We Have a Problem
by Lystelle
Summary: Complete! Will Josh and Donna be able to fight the obstacles of life to find each other?
1. We Have a Problem

"We have a problem."  
"Hello to you to, Donna. I'm fine and you?"  
"You can hold your superiority over me later, Joshua. We have a problem."  
Josh Lyman quickly sobered. He knew that tone in Donna's voice. It wasn't one he liked to hear. "What's going on?" There was silence from the other side. "Donna?"  
"Yeah." She replied.  
"You're not talking."  
"This isn't going to...I just can't seem..."  
"Donna." He was very concerned now.  
"Are you watching the news?" She squeaked.  
"Not lately, I've been busy with...why?" He peered up at his television. It was on mute. He quickly scanned for his remote.  
"It's behind the television." Donna's voice rang in with the answer.  
"You freak me out a little bit." Josh mumbled as he pulled the remote from behind the television. He un-muted the television. "Donna?"  
"Yes, Josh."  
"Please tell me that they're not talking about you in an abortion clinic." He said peering out of his office. Sure enough C.J. Cregg was storming her way down toward his office.  
"I'm so sorry, Josh. Is C.J. there yet?"  
"Joshua Lyman, where is your assistant?" C.J. stood in his doorway. "Donna, where are you?" Josh said looking at C.J.  
"I'm still inside." Donna replied. "I wasn't sure what to do. One of the nurses recognized me, when I was getting ready to leave there was a fleet of reporters. I wasn't sure what to do." She sounded beside herself.  
"First of all, are you okay?" Josh asked not sure how he felt about Donna sitting in an abortion clinic.  
"I'm fine." She muttered.  
"Are you there alone?" Josh inquired.  
"Yeah, I sent Danny home." Donna replied.  
"All right hang on."  
"C.J., she's stuck inside, if she leaves, all we're going to see is the Deputy Chief of Staff's assistant leaving an abortion clinic." Josh said holding the phone against his chest.  
"Is she okay?" C.J. asked.  
"She's fine and she's alone. And I'm pretty sure she's lying to me about being fine." Josh looked at his watch. "Obviously I can't go pick her up. No one who's ever been in front of the camera can go pick her up. In fact no one from the White House can pick her up." C.J. leaned against the doorway.  
"What's Donna doing in an abortion clinic?" Toby asked quietly.  
"We don't know yet. We're trying to figure out how to get her out of there first." Josh said feeling sick to his stomach.  
Suddenly Josh's phone rang. "That's Leo." He handed C.J. the cell phone and picked up his office phone. "Josh Lyman."  
C.J. put the cell phone to her ear. "Donna?"  
"Hi, C.J." Donna sounded upset. "I'm so sorry."  
"Don't worry about it. What are you doing there?" C.J. asked.  
"I can't really explain right now. I'm not entirely sure that there aren't reporters inside." Donna whispered into the phone.  
"Okay, look, we're coming up with a plan to get you out of there."  
"What are you going to do, put on a pair of glasses, a hat and a trench coat and come in here looking unsuspecting? I think the press corp is a little bit smarter than that." Donna sighed. "I should just leave and then I'll turn my resignation in first thing tomorrow."  
"I don't think your boss will agree to that." C.J. glanced over at Josh who was talking passionately on the phone.  
Josh's eyes met C.J.'s. "She's not resigning." Josh barked. He was getting angrier by the minute.  
"C.J., this doesn't look good." Donna retorted. "Leo isn't going to like this."  
"Stay put, I'll call you back in a minute." C.J. hung up the phone at the same time Josh did. "What did Leo say?"  
"He wants to know why I didn't know about this and he even asked if any of this was my fault." Josh was flabbergasted. "I'm supposed to get my ass down there and get her out without anyone seeing. He wants us in his office in one hour. Should I fail to do so, he's going to ask for my resignation."  
"So he took it well then." Toby muttered.  
"I can't believe he thought for one moment that this was in any way my fault." Josh ran his hands over his face and through his hair.  
C.J. called Donna back on her cell phone.  
"Josh?"  
"It's C.J. still. Have you tried calling your roommate?"  
"Yeah, she can't. I've tried everyone I know that doesn't work at the White House and naturally no one is available." Donna whispered.  
"Okay, someone's going to be by to pick you up and bring you here." C.J. hung up again and turned back to Josh. "I'm going to have my friend pick her up. She's going to get brought back here and then you're taking her home and making sure the poor girl is okay." C.J. ordered.  
Josh nodded. Toby and C.J. departed from his office together.  
"This is going to be bad." Toby muttered.  
"Tell me something I don't know." They separated and headed in their own directions.  
  
Donna waited patiently in the women's restroom. She tapped her fingers nervously on the counter. She didn't know what was going to happen. She hadn't meant for anyone to see her come here. Heck she wouldn't have even been here had it not been an emergency. Donna began to pace in front of the blue stalls. She shook her head, she seemed to have picked up some of Josh's nervous habits. She didn't know how she was going to look him in the face. Just then there was a knock on the door.  
Who knocks on a restroom door? Donna thought to herself. "Yeah?" She called out.  
"Are you Donna Moss?" A woman asked peering around the door.  
"Who are you?" Donna questioned.  
"I'm Jane, I'm a friend of C.J.'s, she asked me to come pick you up."  
"You're not a reporter?" Donna still didn't feel comfortable.  
"No, I'm not a reporter. In fact, I've brought a scarf, a hat and a coat for you to wear so the reporters won't get any kind of decent shot of you." Jane replied.  
  
Donna and Jane made it safely to Jane's car. They drove trying to lose the reporters that had jumped into their vehicles to follow. They managed to pull up to the White House and Donna quickly escaped. She made it to the safety of the West Wing and let out a small sigh of relief before she got nervous all over again. She made a pit stop at C.J.'s office before heading to Josh.  
"C.J.?" Donna stood in the doorway.  
"Donna!" She jumped up from her desk. "Are you okay?"  
"I'm really fine."  
"You need to go see Josh." C.J. ordered.  
"I know, I just wanted to know what kind of trouble I caused."  
"Don't worry about it right now. Josh needs to see you and then you have to go see Leo and then you and I can talk."  
"Is he mad?"  
"Josh?"  
"Yeah."  
"Just go see him for yourself, you'll both feel better when you see each other."  
Donna nodded and headed towards her side of the bullpen.  
Josh was standing in his doorway watching her walk down the hallway. She approached him. He stepped aside for her to walk by and then he shut the door behind her.  
"Are you okay?" He asked monotone.  
Donna was sitting in front of his desk while he paced behind it. "Yes."  
Abruptly, he walked around the other side of the desk and stood next to her. "We have to go see Leo." He said emotionlessly.  
She nodded and stood up and followed him to Leo's office. Josh walked steadily a head of her. It was this time through the bullpen that she realized that several White House staffers were watching her with curious or upset expressions. No doubt everyone had heard by now. Gossip always spread like wild fire through the West Wing. They approached Margaret's desk.  
"Donna!" Margaret squeaked. "He's expecting you." She said putting on a more professional attitude. She knocked on Leo's door and then entered. "Josh and Donna are here to see you."  
"Get in here!" Leo yelled.  
Margaret jumped out of the way as the two entered and she quietly closed the door behind them.  
Donna stood quietly next to Josh with her eyes on the floor.  
"Donna, are you okay?" Leo asked abruptly.  
She nodded.  
"Now, I don't mean to be harsh on what must've been a very trying day for you. But what the hell were you doing in an abortion clinic?" Leo all but yelled.  
Josh took a step forward feeling protective. "Leo, I understand that she works at the White House and we're expected to follow a higher standard, but she still has the right to choose."  
"That's great, Josh, but now the question that the President is going to get asked the most is, 'Do you favor abortion? How do you feel about your staffers having abortions?'"  
Donna's head shot up.  
"That's the way it is, Leo!" Josh yelled back to Leo. "The President has made it more than clear about how he feels about abortion. It'll be over and done with by next news cycle. We just have to hope that the Danny guy..."  
"Who's Danny?" Leo barked.  
"The father." Josh replied. "We just have hope that he isn't looking for fifteen minutes of fame."  
"That's not all you have to worry about. Josh, they're going to be parked outside of her apartment, they're going to follow her around and ask her why she had an abortion and..." Leo trailed off.  
"Damn it, Leo! I don't care! It's none of their business." Josh was furious now.  
Donna looked at both men and then saw that the President had entered. She took an unconscious step backwards and knocked into Josh. He put a hand on the small of her back to steady her, but then he didn't remove it.  
"Mr. President!" Leo felt a little ashamed that he was so worked up and arguing he didn't see him walk in.  
"Well I knocked but the yelling in here was so loud that I guess you didn't hear me." President Bartlett took a step towards Donna. "Are you okay, Donna?" He asked sincerely.  
"I'm fine, Mr. President." This was a disaster. Donna wanted to runaway to Wisconsin and never show her face again.  
"I'm glad to hear it. Now would you please tell your side of the story, before the two of these guys have a heart attack? See, Donna, you have to understand that the two of them are incapable of dealing with things of emotion, especially about someone they care deeply about. You're part of the family and they're worried sick about you and your situation." Bartlett explained.  
Donna felt somewhat relieved that the President was willing to hear her out. She kept the President's eyesight as she started. "My friend Danielle, whom everyone calls Danni, called me this morning and told me that she was in an abortion clinic and that she was just about to have an abortion. She begged me to come and be with her. The father had promised to be there but never showed. So I waited with her and one of the nurses asked if I worked at the White House. She said she had seen me on television next to the Deputy Chief of Staff. I didn't have time really to reply when the nurse called Danni back into one of the rooms. So when everything was done we went to leave and that's when we saw the press." Donna explained. "So I sent Danni home because she had been through enough and I called everyone I knew to come pick me up and then I called Josh."  
Josh and Leo both looked sheepish.  
"Now I know that I didn't clarify why I was at an abortion clinic and I know why the press jumped to conclusions because that's what they do, but I didn't expect..." She trailed. "I'm sorry for any confusion."  
Leo and Josh just looked at each other and then back at Donna.  
"How's your friend Danni?" The President asked.  
"She's a bit shaken up. The reason she was getting an abortion to begin with is because she was raped a couple of months ago. The pregnancy came from that and she couldn't bear..." Donna wiped the tears from her cheeks. "I'm sorry for causing so much commotion."  
Josh lowered his head and didn't say anything else. "Please tell Danni that I say that I'm so sorry for her loss and her situation. And you let me know if there is anything we can do for her." With that he left.  
"Thank you, Mr. President." Donna replied with a small smile that faded when she turned back to Leo and Josh.  
"I'm sorry, Donna, I didn't mean to jump to conclusions." Leo said looking at her like he had learned that the Dow just went down ten points.  
"It's fine. I understand." Donna replied.  
"Will you excuse Josh and I for a moment please?" Leo asked.  
Donna nodded and headed out of the office almost colliding with Margaret. "Hi, Margaret."  
"Is everything okay? You're not being fired are you?" She said with urgency.  
"No, Margaret, everything is fine." Donna didn't want to have to explain what happened. She felt invaded. People were judging her for something she hadn't done. She quickly headed back to the bullpen.  
"Donna, over here!" C.J. called from her office.  
Donna was very happy to hide in C.J.'s office. She headed over there quickly and ducked inside.  
  
"Leo, I don't understand how you could even jump to conclusions like that!"  
"I didn't even have to jump, I took a step and there the conclusions were."  
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"  
"I leave you guys alone for five minutes and again with the yelling." Bartlett was standing in the doorway again. "I'm trying to have a meeting with the security advisors and I keep getting distracted. What's the problem?"  
"I'm sorry, Mr. President. Things have just been a little high on the emotional scale today."  
"Yeah." Bartlett confirmed. "So we figured out the main stress point why is there still yelling going on?"  
"I was asking Leo about a comment he made when he first found out about Donna and the abortion clinic and I wasn't sure why it was made and frankly I was terribly upset that it was made." Josh said trying to keep his temper down.  
"What was said?" Bartlett asked.  
"I may have implied that Josh had something to do with Donna sitting in an abortion clinic." Leo said rolling his eyes.  
Bartlett raised his eyebrows. "Really?"  
"Yes, sir." Leo replied.  
He turned to Josh. "You're upset by that?"  
"Why shouldn't I be?" Josh asked defensively.  
"I just asked a simple question, son!" Bartlett snapped. "Why are you upset about the comment?"  
Josh felt cornered suddenly. "I just did not appreciate the implication that Donna and I would be involved that way without anyone knowing, second that if we were involved that way and she was having an abortion that I wouldn't be right by her side every step of the way and third I just don't understand how I was brought into it to begin with, she's my assistant." He muttered.  
"Josh?"  
He looked up to the President. "Yes, sir?" He asked.  
"Donna is more to you than just your assistant." Bartlett stated.  
"She's one of my best friends." Josh finished for him.  
"That's right." Bartlett confirmed.  
"That's right." Josh suddenly felt like his parents had just busted in on him having sex on prom night.  
"You can go." Bartlett stated.  
"Thank you, Mr. President." Josh left quickly.  
"I slipped." Leo said to his friend.  
Bartlett smiled. "That boy is so far into denial. I can't believe he was just going to stand there and say that she was his assistant though." He shook his head. "He was so angry at her for being with another man that that was pretty much all he could think about. Not to mention what a jerk he thought the guy was for leaving her alone at the clinic to begin with."  
"Yeah." Leo agreed. "He was just mad that he didn't know."  
"Yeah." Bartlett looked toward the door that Josh had exited from.  
  
"Oh thank God!" C.J. was relieved. "Not that I have any judgments, but I was really worried about you. I would hate to think what it would be like to go through something like that."  
Donna nodded. "I never want to know. Seeing that look on Danni's face..." She trailed off feeling sick to her stomach. "So how do we control this?"  
"Leave it to me. There's no problem here." C.J. replied. "How's Josh?"  
"I don't know. He barely looked at me." Donna said standing up. "I guess the best thing would be just to get back to work."  
C.J. nodded and watched as Donna disappeared outside of her door. C.J. picked up her phone. "Hey, Jackass, she's on her way back, be nice." C.J. instructed.  
  
Donna took off her jacket, it was Spring but still a little chilly at times. She slid her purse off her shoulder and looked over her desk. She had been gone for nearly three hours and chaos seem to have found her desk with no problem. She looked over Josh's schedule. He was supposed to be in a budget meeting in about two minutes. She picked up the file that she knew he would ask for and headed for his office. She peered in the doorway he was staring blankly at his desk.  
"Josh?" Donna flinched at the quietness of her voice. She wished she could just start smacking off orders like she always did, but something felt wrong between them.  
"Hmm?" He looked up to find her standing in the doorway. "How long have you been there?"  
"Not long."  
"What's up?"  
"You've got budget in like a minute."  
"Yeah." He didn't move.  
"Josh?"  
"Yeah?"  
"The meeting isn't in your office." Donna stated.  
"Yeah."  
Donna took a step forward. "Josh?" She said a little bit more stern while she closed the door.  
He looked over at her again. "What's going on with you?"  
"How do you mean?"  
"You know exactly what I mean."  
"Okay, except that I don't know what you mean."  
"Donna, why did you lie to me? You said that you would never lie to me again."  
"Yeah, and as your assistant I will never lie to you again. As your friend I can't make those kinds of promises. The only reason why you know anything now is because the press corps decided that it was a story. I wasn't keeping things from you, it was my friend's secret, Josh, not mine."  
"If it had been you?"  
Donna looked at him for a long moment, not sure how to respond. He stood up and took the folder from her hands. "It wasn't supposed to be a stumper." He muttered walking out of his office leaving her there.  
  
C.J. released a statement clearing Donna of much more hassle by the end of the week no one remembered the story. Donna and Josh had resumed their daily routine and as usual were ignoring any discomfort with each other.  
"Donna!"  
"It's on your desk."  
"Donna!"  
"Josh." Donna leaned in his doorway.  
"I need the thing."  
"I've told you ten times it's on your desk."  
"No it's not!" He replied pushing papers around.  
Donna walked over and underneath the pile she pulled out a blue folder.  
"Well who could find anything on this desk?" Josh said grumbling under his breath.  
"Now you're blaming me for the condition of your desk?" Donna asked.  
"That's right."  
"Have you seen my desk, Josh?"  
"Today or ever?"  
"Okay, you're going to be late for staff."  
"Donna?" He called right before she disappeared again.  
"Yeah?"  
"Nothing."  
Donna stepped back into his office. "Josh, that is the eighth time you've done that this week." She snapped.  
"You've counted?"  
"Well after the first three I got suspicious. I was just going to wait it out, but apparently you're never going to say whatever it is that you have to say, so I thought I would just come right out and say it."  
"I'm going to be late for staff." He said heading out of his office.  
Donna sighed and headed back to her desk.  
  
"Hi."  
"Nothing!" Josh snarled.  
Toby looked at Josh for a moment. "What was that?"  
Josh looked over at Toby. "Sorry I was in my own thoughts."  
"Apparently. You may want to look into that." Toby said monotone as usual.  
"Yeah."  
"Seriously, Josh, are you okay?"  
"Yeah, I'm fine." He replied.  
"Because you've been acting weird since..." Toby trailed off. "Did something happen between you and Donna?"  
They approached the Oval Office. "No, everything's fine." Josh replied briskly.  
"Okay."  
  
Nearly three weeks later Donna had stayed late one night. She was busily typing at her desk. Josh watched her carefully from his doorway. Most of the West Wing people had gone home for the night. She outline glowed in the dim lighting on her desk. The white and blue computer screen haloed her hair. He let out a frustrated sigh. Three weeks after the incident things had returned to normal more or less but there was still something strained between them. Suddenly she turned her head and met his gaze. Josh felt like a deer caught in headlights. He quickly escaped to his office closing the door behind him.  
There was a small knock on his door just as he sat down and Donna peeked her head in. "Did you need something?"  
"Um, no."  
"Then why were you...is something wrong?"  
"No, I was just looking around the bullpen, taking a quick break."  
"You were looking around the bullpen?"  
"Yes."  
"Taking a break?"  
"Yes."  
"Joshua, what's going on with you?"  
"Nothing."  
"You've been acting strange for quite a while now."  
"I have not been acting strange. I've been acting like me."  
"I know you pretty well and this is not you."  
"If you know me so well then what is wrong with me?"  
"You're mad at me."  
Josh opened his mouth to argue but found that no words came out to argue with her. He took a deep breath. "Donna, I'm not mad at you."  
"You're hurt that I hesitated with the question you gave me three weeks ago. You're mad that I didn't say 'of course I would come straight to you if I were going to have an abortion.'"  
"Okay, apparently you do know me really well."  
"You just don't get it!"  
"What don't I get, Donna? You lied to me to help a friend, I get that, but you basically said that you would lie to me if it were you."  
"I'm sorry, Josh, but if it were me, I wouldn't want you to know. I wouldn't want to see that look in your eye."  
"What look?"  
"The look you gave me when you found out I lied about the diary."  
Josh flinched. They had never mentioned the diary once Cliff handed it back to Josh that night and said that no one would ever hear one word about the entire situation. Josh had handed her the diary and asked if she could get home okay and left her. For a long time after that things had never quite seemed the same between them and Donna knew that she never wanted him to look at her the way did that day.  
"You think I would judge you if you had an abortion."  
"It's more than that, Josh."  
"Explain it to me please."  
"I would never want you to know that I was capable of something like that."  
Josh's expression softened a little. "Donna, you know I feel about abortion. I know that if you ever made a decision like that, it would be because it was best for you, not because...I know better than that."  
"Maybe, but I just wouldn't want to risk seeing that look."  
Josh stood up and crossed the room. He sat down in the chair next to her. "You're one of the most important people in my life, Donna, I would never...I should've never looked at you like that when the whole diary thing happened."  
"It's okay, Josh, I would've looked at me that way too."  
"I didn't look at you like that because you lied," he confessed.  
Donna's attention snapped up to his face. "What are you talking about?"  
"I hated that you saw Cliff again. Even after I told you couldn't and you knew you couldn't you saw him again."  
"Yeah..." She wasn't following.  
"It meant that you liked him a lot and even worse than that you probably had slept with him which is why he knew about the diary to begin with."  
Donna lowered her head again. This felt worse than any of the other thoughts of why he had been so angry and so disappointed. "What are you saying, Josh?"  
"I was jealous, Donna. I'm always jealous."  
Donna couldn't look at him this time. The shock resonated through her body. "What are you saying, Josh?" she asked again.  
"I guess I'm saying that..." he tucked his finger under her chin and raised her eyes to his. He slowly lowered his lips to hers. It was a barely there kiss but it meant the world to both of them.  
"That's saying a lot," Donna whispered.  
"You're telling me." 


	2. Sam's Fault

"Donna!"  
Donna stormed into his office with her hands on her hips and waited for him to look up from his computer. "Donna!" he screamed again.  
She let out a frustrated sigh. He looked over at her. "How long have you been standing there?"  
"We've talked about this," she stated agitatedly.  
"Talked about what?"  
"Your bellowing my name."  
"What was the conclusion of the conversation?"  
"That you would no long continue to bellow my name. And you know what you did?"  
"I bellowed your name."  
"That's right."  
"You know what?"  
"You don't care because you're trying to run the country?"  
"I don't care because I'm trying to run the country."  
"What do you want, Joshua?" Donna was feeling aggravated all the way around. This was her fourth night this week working until long past one o'clock in the morning. They were in the middle of a debacle, and she was completely happy to jump in and help, but it had been just over a week since they had kissed. In fact Josh was now doing everything in his power to keep things extremely professional between the two of them. It was frustrating as hell. If it was a mistake, he should've just said so.  
Once he barked one of his inane orders she stormed out of his office and back to her desk to finish the report she had started. She wasn't staying late tomorrow, she didn't care what bill was going to be passed or in this case not be passed.  
  
Josh listened to her thump back out to her desk. She was mad. He was stupid and sometimes blind but she was mad. And she wasn't mad because he yelled her name, she was mad that he hadn't said or done anything to follow up with the...incident. Every time he yelled for her to come into the office his intentions were to ask her to dinner or out for a drink but he chickened out every time. It wasn't fear of rejection or anything. This was Donna. He was afraid that if they finally went down the road he wanted to go down so badly that he would mess everything up and not only would Donna hate him she would leave him...for good.  
Josh winced at the idea as if someone had sucker punched him in the stomach. He turned his thoughts back to work. It was safer there. Two more minutes of that and he got up and closed the door and sat in front of his phone. He dialed a very familiar number and waited.  
"Sam Seaborn."  
"Hey, Sam."  
"Josh! How are you, man?"  
"I'm good. How are things in California?"  
"What's wrong?"  
"What do you mean what's wrong?"  
"Josh, you're calling me at one o'clock in the morning your time and you're asking me how things are in California? I talked to you a week ago and you could care less how things are in California."  
"Sam, I think I messed up."  
"What did you do?"  
Josh let out a long sigh. "About a week ago..." He told Sam the story of the conversation he and Donna had after the abortion clinic accident and then he told them about the incident.  
"That was over a week ago?" Sam sounded irritated now too.  
"Well, yes."  
"You have to do something."  
"What?"  
"You have to do something."  
"I appreciate the sentiment, but what do you think I should do?"  
"I don't know, but it should probably revolve around telling her how you feel and you know anything short of that you should ignore."  
"I can't do that, Sam."  
"Why not? You two have been doing this dance since day one."  
"What are you talking about?"  
"You know about the rumors. Those have been going on since the campaign. Everyone is still shocked as hell that you two still haven't figured it out and after the revelations that 'the incident', as you call it, brought on, you still don't have a clue...you have to do something, Josh, and it better be soon."  
"What if I lose her, Sam?"  
"Don't hold back on life for 'what ifs'. You may lose her anyway if you do that."  
Josh let out a shaky sigh. "Since the campaign?"  
"Yeah."  
"Okay."  
"Josh?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You two are my best friends, I love you both dearly, but you're a bunch of blockheads. Find her, fix this and I promise you'll feel like a whole new man."  
Josh smiled. "Thanks."  
"No thanks required, just make me the best man and we'll call it even."  
  
"Sam Seaborn."  
"Hi, Sam, it's Donna."  
"Hey, how are you?"  
"What are you laughing about?"  
"Nothing, whatsoever. What's up?"  
"How's California?"  
"Is this about Josh?"  
Donna gasped and her mouth dropped. "Why would you say that?"  
"Because you're asking about California. Just fess up. It's late where you are and I'm sure you and Josh are working late for a reason. What's going on?"  
"He kissed me a little over a week ago and now nothing. He's avoiding me and acting all professional. When was the last time you saw or heard Josh act professional around me?"  
"This is dire," Sam said sarcastically.  
"You're laughing."  
"I am not. Well maybe just a little."  
"Why don't you just go talk to him about it?"  
"What?! You mean walk into his office and say 'hey, you kissed me, now what?'"  
"Sure. Why not?"  
"Because he could hear me."  
"Donna!"  
"I'm serious, Sam, what if he thinks the kiss was a mistake?"  
"What if he does?"  
"I don't like talking to you anymore."  
Sam chuckled. "You two are a bunch of blockheads. You two are my best friends, I love you both, but seriously blockheads. Just go talk to him. I promise you'll feel better once you do."  
"You've been very little help. I hope you know when it comes to your time of need I'm going to be as much help as you have been right now."  
"Excellent. Now, go talk to him. You're both trying to run the country and you can't do it if you're calling me up because 'Dear Abby' is busy."  
"Good night, Sam."  
"Good night, Donna."  
Sam hung up his cell phone and put it back on his nightstand. He shut off the light and let out a long sigh. "They're going to blame this on me."  
  
An hour later Donna was gathering her things getting ready to call it a night. It was Friday night and she knew that Josh would ask her to come in tomorrow morning, but it was a small sacrifice she would make to serve at the pleasure of the President. She strolled over to Josh's office. She peered in and saw that his head was down on his desk.  
"Josh?"  
No response.  
Donna tip toed into the office and leaned over his desk to see that he was out. She smiled. She stacked the files she brought in nicely on his desk and then went around to his side. She kneeled down next to him.  
"Joshua?" she called gently. She didn't like to wake him with a start. He didn't stir. She moved her hand up to his shoulder to shake him awake. Just as he did, he started to mumble in his sleep.  
"Joshua, wake up," she said a little more sternly.  
He murmured some more. She let out a long sigh. She was half tempted to leave him there for the night. She was sure he would get some sleep at least. Instead of going home and turning on MSNBC and yelling at any given Republican he found.  
"Josh, it's time to go home." She used her normal voice and Josh's eyes fluttered open.  
"What's going on?" he mumbled still half a sleep.  
"It's almost two thirty, it's time to go home so you can be back in the office in five hours." Donna gently rubbed his back hoping to get the blood circulating through his body.  
"What day is it?" He didn't raise his head off the desk yet.  
"Technically it's Saturday."  
"What are you still doing here?"  
"Working on 486 remember?" she said softly.  
"You should go home."  
"So should you. You need to sleep in a bed."  
"How about your bed?"  
Donna's eyes grew wide and she felt Josh's entire body stiffen under her touch. She gently withdrew her hand but she couldn't find the muscles to move away from him. She let out a small sigh.  
"What about my bed, Joshua?" She decided that she was going to play with him a little bit.  
"There's no way that this is a dream, is it?"  
"Why would you want to be dreaming about my bed?" She liked where this was going.  
Josh opened one eye and when he found her still sitting directly in front of him he closed it again quickly. "I just meant that if I need to sleep in a bed shouldn't you be sleeping in a bed."  
"Well if I go home that's exactly where I'll be sleeping, my bed."  
"Are you going home?"  
"If I can get you to wake up enough to drive yourself, otherwise I'm going to be going to your house and then I'll go home."  
"I'm fine, Donna, go on and go home."  
"Josh, I'm not leaving you here to sleep in your office. You wake up grumpy and irritable and as the only person who gets to deal with grizzly bear Lyman, I insist that you go home and get some real sleep in a real bed."  
"I comfortable right where I am."  
"Why are you fighting me on this? Your neck is killing you and your back is sore."  
"I want a new assistant."  
"Because I know you too well?"  
"No, because I want one that does what I say."  
Donna rolled her eyes and decided to take things into her own hands. She was done being gentle. She grabbed Josh's arm and yanked really hard, spinning him in his chair so he had to sit up straight. This forced Donna to her knees right between his legs.  
Josh let out a hiss and Donna looked up to meet his gaze. He wore an expression of pure embarrassment and almost like he was in pain. She balanced herself gently between his thighs and then she realized her mistake.  
Her pink mouth formed a small 'oh' as she stared down at the raise in his pants. Her whole entire body went rigid and so did his.  
"You're not helping by staring like that." Josh's entire body was tense. Having Donna between his legs at a moment like this was not helping anything. He wanted so badly to lift her into his lap and have his way with her. He didn't think she would appreciate that very much right now. She needed to move or do something before he exploded right under her stare.  
Donna shifted her gaze to his chest with a sneak peek up into his eyes. She couldn't help but feel a little dazed by the entire situation. She wasn't sure how to respond. She didn't think standing up and running out his office would be the best way to handle it, and she didn't think unzipping his pants and helping him remedy the problem was probably much better, even though that was the more enticing idea.  
"What happened?" she whispered.  
"Dreams," he muttered.  
She cocked an eyebrow. "Really?"  
"You find this amusing don't you?"  
"Come on, Joshua, could this situation get more embarrassing?"  
"I could think of a couple of ways." His voice sounded rough and playful.  
She smirked. "Good point." She started to move and then looked back up at him. "Whom were you dreaming about?"  
Josh felt his entire body tense again. He laid his head back against his chair and let out a deep groan.  
"I don't know why I bother, even if you did produce a name it would probably be a lie any how...so you might as..."  
"You," he interrupted quietly.  
"Just say anything and I'll get up and leave you...I'm sorry?" A shiver ran down her spine when she comprehended his words. She couldn't help the small smile that played over her lips as she blushed. She looked down again getting another eye full of Josh without even thinking. She closed her eyes tight and felt Josh's hands clasp her upper arms and pull her upwards.  
"You're killing me here," he gasped as he sat her on his thigh. She felt her hip rub up against him causing him to gasp again.  
"I think it's time we talk."  
"Talk?" she squeaked.  
He smirked realizing that he was getting to her as much as she was getting to him. His hand that rested lightly on her knee had the urge to skim under her skirt to find out just how much he was getting to her.  
"There are some things I think that are still very much unresolved between us after the whole clinic thing and the thing a week ago and now this...don't you think we should talk?"  
Donna nodded. She felt herself relax in his arms. She liked being surrounded by him, his scent, his warmth and his touch.  
She nodded quietly; her fingers were playing with the buttons to his shirt. "So talk."  
He opened his mouth and all that came out was a high-pitched beeping noise. Josh's arm snaked around her waist and held her to him as he tilted so he could reach his pager that was going off. He pushed a couple of buttons and let out a deep breath. He set the pager on his desk and wrapped his other hand around her pulling her flush against his chest. He brought her mouth into contact with his where he immediately slipped his tongue into her wanting, wet, hot mouth.  
She let out a small moan that he swallowed as she pulled herself closer to him. Josh undid the kiss and quickly as he had started it. He lightly caressed her hair tucking it behind her ears.  
"Something's happened." With Donna still on his lap he picked up the phone and dialed Leo's extension.  
"Leo, it's Josh." He paused. "No, I'm still in the office. Yeah, I'll be right there." He hung up the phone and turned back to Donna. "I've got to go."  
She moved to get off of him, he held her there for a moment. "You should go. We can do this later."  
"Do which part later?" Josh raised his eyebrows.  
"It depends on how well you do with the talking part." Donna finally managed to stand up on her own feet. She felt a little lightheaded. He brushed by her and stopped in his doorway. "You can go home if you want."  
"No, it's okay. I'll stay, you may need me."  
Josh opened his mouth as if he were going to say something and then closed his mouth again. "I'll be back in a bit." With that he was gone.  
Donna leaned against his desk. Some how that last fifteen minutes had done nothing for the situation except left her frustrated with another haunting kiss.  
"This is all Sam's fault," she growled.  
  
Josh hurried to Leo's office. He was on edge now with adranline like he was everytime there was a situation at the White House. On top of that he was sexually frustrated, confused and slightly embarrassed still.  
"This is all Sam's fault," Josh muttered just before he entered Leo's office.


	3. Pillow Talk

"Is there something going on between you and Josh?" C.J. was sitting at her desk looking over the morning wires.  
Donna felt her heart slam against her chest. "How do you mean?"  
"You two are acting incredibly weird. Did you get into a fight or something?"  
Donna wanted to cry out in relief. "We're just a little off lately. Nothing to call the press about."  
C.J. looked up and met Donna's gaze. "Donna?"  
"Yes, C.J.?"  
"Is there something going on between you and Josh?"  
"No, we haven't had a fight. We're fine."  
"Nothing going on that the press would need to know about."  
C.J. nodded. "Okay, well call me later maybe we could do lunch or something."  
Donna smiled and turned around and headed out of the office. She let out a low sigh of relief and muttered to herself, "No nothing at all."  
She sat down in her chair just in time for Josh to bellow her name for the twentieth time that day and it was barely ten o'clock. She headed into his office and leaned in the doorway.  
"What's up, boss?"  
"I need the thing and what time is my meeting with Rupert?"  
"Eleven and I put the thing on your desk like an hour ago when you yelled for it." Donna strutted over to his desk and rummaged through the piles of paperwork and files on his desk. She pulled out a green folder and handed it to him.  
"Thanks." He glanced up at Donna. "What's with you all of the sudden?"  
"C.J. called me into her office," she said causally.  
"Okay."  
"She was wondering if there was something going on between us."  
Josh nearly spit out all of his coffee.  
"She was wondering if we were having a fight or something. It seems we've been acting unlike ourselves."  
"What did you tell her?"  
Donna turned around and sauntered out of the office, saying over her shoulder, "That there was absolutely nothing going on."  
  
Josh watched her leave. He had been in crash position since he went to Leo's office that night after he and Donna kissed for the second time. It had nearly been another week. He had been dying to pull her into his office and show her how he felt, but things kept coming up. Every time an opportune moment presented itself something else would happen. He hadn't been avoiding her...well maybe a little. He also hadn't done much to make it so they could see each outside of the office.  
He let out a long sigh. Donna reappeared in his doorway a couple of minutes later. "Leo wants to see you."  
Josh stood up and tugged his suit jacket on and headed down the hall. "Hey, Margaret, he wanted to see me."  
"Yeah, go on in."  
Josh stepped into Leo's office; he was sitting behind his desk talking on the phone. He motioned for Josh to shut the door and enter. Josh shut the door just as Leo hung up.  
"What's going on with you and Donna?"  
Josh froze and his entire mind went blank. "What do you mean?"  
"Don't play stupid with me, son. What's going on?"  
"Honestly, Leo, I don't know what you're..."  
Leo interrupted, "Are you sleeping together?"  
Josh started coughing and he put his hand on the back of the chair in front of him to keep himself from falling on the floor. "Leo, what the hell..."  
"You two have been acting weird around each other and people are noticing and asking questions."  
"Who are these people?" Josh was trying to act astounded not guilty.  
"It doesn't matter. If something is going to happen between you and Donna...and stop giving me that look, Josh, you know damn well what I'm talking about...if something is going to happen we need a heads up. No one is going to stop you or anything it's just something we're going to have to get geared up for."  
"Which we're willing to do." Toby's voice came from behind Josh.  
"Okay, see now I'm confused." Josh looked back and fourth between the older men and asked, "Are you encouraging me or asking me?"  
"A little of both." Toby glanced over at Leo. "It seems to us that you two have put this thing between the two of you off and we think maybe that's why you guys are starting to act weird is because it's starting to get to you."  
Josh looked down at the ground. "That's not why we're acting weird."  
"Then why?" Toby sat down on the couch.  
"Because three weeks after the abortion incident I kissed her then a week in a half after that I kissed her again and it's been a week since that and we're off kilter because we haven't talked about any of it."  
Leo chuckled to himself and Toby smirked. "You two do realize you're not in high school anymore, right?"  
"If you're just going to make jokes, I'm leaving right now."  
"I'm sorry, Josh, but you really are just hopeless when it comes to women."  
Josh let his head hang hopelessly. "Can I go now, Leo?"  
"So what is going to happen now?"  
"Nothing. I think Donna's pissed at me now and it's probably all over. I think I ruined something before it even started which is even a record for me."  
"Well find a way to get back on track one way or the other. Now get out of here." Leo watched as Josh sulked out of his office. He turned to Toby who was still smirking. "I think it's time we get geared up for this."  
"Sam was right, the two of them are so far in denial about each other that even when they admit it out loud they're clueless about how they feel." Toby stood up. "The longer they let this drag the bigger the explosion in the end."  
  
Donna looked up as she saw Josh approaching. He was in deep thought she could tell. He glanced over at her, their eyes locked and Donna suddenly felt pinned to her chair. His eyes never left hers until he passed her and went directly into his office and shut the door.  
She suddenly felt very on edge. She waited a good five minutes before she walked over to Josh's office. She tapped lightly and opened the door. He peered up from his desk.  
"What's up?"  
"Here's the thing you need for your meeting with Rupert which is in ten." She walked the folder to his desk and turned around to leave.  
"Donna?"  
"Yeah."  
"Did I ruin everything?"  
She tilted her head and looked at him for a moment. She let a small smile curve over her lips. "No," she murmured. He smiled back with full dimples and she felt a little weak in the knees.  
She scurried back out to her desk and answered the phone just as she reached it.  
"Josh Lyman."  
"Donna?"  
_Oh my god_!  
  
It was nearly nine o'clock in the evening when Josh wandered out in the bullpen. "How's it going?" He sat on the edge of her desk.  
She leaned back in her chair. "It's nine o'clock at night on a Friday, I'm doing just fine. How are you?"  
"I'm ready to go home."  
"Really?"  
"Yeah. It's Friday night, do you want to have a drink with me?" Josh felt his stomach twist.  
"Tonight?" she squeaked.  
"That was kind of the idea. I thought maybe we could talk."  
Donna just started to laugh. "You are unbelievable."  
"What? What I'd do?"  
"I would love to go out and have a drink and talk...but I can't. Jack called me today and asked me to give him a call at his hotel when I got off. He says that he has to talk to me as well. He's only in town for a couple of nights and..."  
Josh held up his hand to stop her from going on any further. "Commander Wonderful is back in town?"  
Donna just nodded.  
"So that's it then?"  
"What do you want me to do, call him up and tell him I can't see him, my boss whom I see everyday wants to have a drink and talk?"  
"Yeah!"  
"Josh!"  
"What? I don't want you to go out with him."  
"It's not a date, Josh, he just wanted to see me."  
"Donna, be realistic, do you really think he just wants to have dinner."  
"Maybe not, but at least Jack didn't hesitate to ask me out to dinner or anything else for that matter."  
"Jack isn't busy running the country. Jack is sitting in a hotel room wondering what his ex-girlfriend is doing so maybe he can get a little action."  
Donna stood up and poked Josh in the chest. "So you're saying the only reason why he would call me is to get a little action because lord knows how easy I am?"  
Josh opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out at first.  
"That's just great, Josh. I don't know why you would want to go have a drink with the D.C. whore. Have a good night! I will not be in tomorrow!" She grabbed her purse and her jacket and stormed out of the west wing.  
Josh stood there trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.  
  
It was nearly eleven when Josh heard a loud pounding on his door. He moved off the couch and headed to the door.  
"Donna?"  
"Hello, Mr. Lyman."  
"You're drunk."  
"Turnabout is fair play. You've shown up drunk to my apartment far much more than I have shown up to yours." She wavered a little bit and Josh reached out to hold her steady. She pulled out of his grip. "I'm fine!" she snapped.  
"I can see that. What are you doing here?"  
"I couldn't find my keys or it turns out my apartment and for some reason I had no trouble remembering where yours was, so here I am. I thought this would be better than a headline that said, 'Deputy Chief of Staff's Assistant Found in Gutter.'"  
"Good call." He dragged her inside and closed the door. "Why are you drunk?"  
"There was wine at dinner."  
Josh helped pull off her coat and hung up it up on the coat rack. His eyes traced over her body. She was wearing a red slinky dress. Josh felt angry and aroused all at the same time. He loved when she wore red and here she was wearing red for Commander Wonderful.  
"Why did you get drunk?"  
"After Jack proposed I was feeling the need to relax a little."  
Josh stopped suddenly in his tracks causing Donna to run into his backside. "Proposed another dinner invitation?" he asked hopefully.  
"Marriage."  
"Ah." He turned around to face her. "What did you say to him?"  
"About what?" Donna began swaying.  
"The proposal."  
"I didn't have to say anything. After about two hours of me ranting and raving about my lunatic boss he retracted the proposal and put me in a cab."  
"Why were you talking about me?"  
"According to him...it's because I'm in love with someone else."  
Josh's stomach was starting to twist for all new reasons. "Are you?"  
Donna glared at him. "You were mean tonight."  
Josh led her to the couch and pushed mute on MSNBC and turned back to Donna. "I'm really sorry if I hurt your feelings. I was just not thrilled about you going out with Jack."  
"Why couldn't you just say that, instead of making it about me?" She pouted.  
"Because I'm an idiot. You know that. Why are you surprised when I do stupid things?" He sighed. "I'm sorry, Donnatella."  
She smiled. "I would've said no anyhow."  
"Really?"  
"Yeah."  
"Why? I mean he was great to you."  
"Don't love him."  
Josh nodded. "You should go to bed. You're going to have one hell of a hang over tomorrow."  
"Where am I going to sleep?"  
"My bed."  
"Will you be there?"  
"No I'll sleep on the couch."  
"I always give you the couch when you're drunk."  
"Do you want to sleep on the couch?"  
"No, but I don't want you to sleep on it either."  
"Where should I sleep?"  
  
Donna woke up feeling dizzy, nauseated and blurry. She didn't move for a very long time. She kept her eyes closed because every time she opened them, the sunlight blinded her and seared her headache. It took a long time for her to notice that there was an arm draped over her hip. She retraced her memory. She remembered having dinner with Jack and she remembered that there was lots of wine. She remembered him proposing and then the rest of her memory was hazy.  
Oh no! She slowly opened her eyes letting them get used to the light. She peered over to her right and saw a fully clothed Josh sleeping next to her. He was on top of the covers laying face down with his arm draped over her waist. She then remembered seeing him last night, but she couldn't remember much more than that.  
The blankets had shifted over the night and were now down around her knees. Donna spotted her dress flung over in the corner of the room. She wondered if she took it off or if Josh had. She looked down at her red bra and panty-clad body, her matching garter still holding up her stockings. She shifted a bit trying to reach the blanket without disturbing Josh.  
"Donnatella, stop squirming," Josh mumbled into his pillow scaring Donna half to death. He reached down and pulled the blanket up over her chest placing his arm over her waist again. Then he twisted his head around and looked at her through blurry morning eyes. "What are you doing awake?"  
"My body always wakes up at five thirty," she muttered.  
"Tell it to go back to sleep," he whined.  
"Josh, why is my dress lying in the corner of your bedroom? More importantly why am I in your bedroom?"  
Josh raised his head off the pillow. "How many bottles of wine did you drink?"  
"Too many."  
"You came over last night. You didn't want to sleep on the couch and you didn't want me to sleep on the couch. Then once we got in here you stripped off the dress and threw it across the room and got under the covers."  
"In front of you?"  
"Don't I wish! No, I was in the bathroom."  
"Why did I come here and not go home?"  
"You said you couldn't find your keys or your apartment."  
A flash of a memory came from the night before. Jack had told her that she was in love with Josh. He put her in a cab and she decided that she was going to go tell Josh that she was not in love with him, but when she got to the door all she could think about was how darn cute he looked.  
"Right, it's all coming back to me now," she let out a heavy sigh and closed her eyes and cuddled back down into the covers.  
"Now I'm all awake," groaned Josh.  
"I should go home, so you can get some sleep." Donna started to sit up but Josh pushed her back down into the pillows, throwing his leg over hers so she couldn't move. "Joshua, what are you doing?"

"Holding you hostage."

"What on earth for?" He turned his face into his pillow. He said something but Donna couldn't make it out for the life of her. "Joshua, I didn't understand that."

"You don't understand 'pillow talk?'"

She glanced over at him to see him smirking. "What'd you say?"  
"I like laying here with you and I don't want you to go," he whispered. Donna looked at him for a long moment.

"I appreciate the sentiment but I'm laying here in my underwear while you're fully clothed, it's a little..." She trailed off as he sat up and pulled his t-shirt over his head and then slipped out of his jeans discarding the pieces of clothing on the floor. He pulled back the covers and slipped into the bed in nothing but his boxer briefs. Donna's mouth just kind of hung open from surprise and lust.

"Better?"

She felt his furry leg graze hers. She turned onto her side to face him. "What's going on here, Josh?"

"Don't you think it's high time we had that talk we should've had like a month ago?"  
  
Donna smirked. "Oh sure it takes a proposal and me laying half naked in your bed for us to get here!" Josh glanced over her body. "You know you got a whole show when I stripped, this isn't exactly fair."

"Joshua, you were talking."

"Right." He brought his gaze back up to hers. Her blue eyes were shining brightly. "You're beautiful in the morning," he said at last. Donna couldn't help but smile. There were a few sobering moments that she had had with Josh. The night she told him about Dr. Freeride stopping for a beer, the night he told her to keep the red dress that she had bought to go out with some gomer, the night of the Inauguration balls when he told her she looked amazing.  
"Talk, Joshua!"  
"I guess the easiest way to say this is that I'm in love with you."  
Just then Josh's cell phone rang. "Oh my god," Donna growled.  
"Josh Lyman." Josh didn't say anything but his expression got darker and darker as the minute went by. Finally he said, "Okay, we'll be in a few minutes." He looked at Donna and flipped his phone shut. "We have a problem."


	4. Team Josh

"What do you mean the press is at every exit?"  
Josh pulled his t-shirt over his head and looked at her with that this-is-not-fault expression. "Apparently the press thinks we're having an affair."  
Donna was looking for the zipper on the side of the dress; she froze and looked up at Josh. "Strip!"  
Josh smirked. "What?"  
"Strip!" she ordered again.  
"I can't, we have to be in Leo's office in twenty minutes."  
"If I'm going to be accused of having an affair," she approached Josh reaching for the hem of his shirt, "I'm going to by god be wreaking the benefits of one."  
Josh grabbed her wrists and pulled her against him. "While I applaud the thought, Leo's waiting and I don't want our first time to be with the press twenty feet from the building thinking that we're doing what we would be doing."  
"They ruined our moment. In fact our moments keep on getting ruined." She buried her face in the crook of his neck.  
He stroked her hair lightly and inhaled deeply. He loved her scent, she smelled like lilacs and vanilla with an underlying musk that was all woman. "I know this sucks, but I promise I'll make up for all the ruined moments."  
"Really?"  
"Truly." He nipped playfully at her ear.  
She giggled and pulled back to look at him. "How are we getting out of here?"  
He had an evil grin on his face. "I'm glad you asked."  
  
"Hi, Margaret." Donna stood in front of her friend's desk.  
"Is it true?"  
Donna smiled at the red head. She was the queen gossip in the White House among other things. "Is what true?"  
"Are you and Josh having an..."  
"Good morning, Margaret." Josh strutted in.  
"Hi, Josh." Margaret eyed them carefully and then nodded. "You can go in."  
Josh reached for Donna's hand and pulled her behind him. They tentatively stood in front of Leo who was reading a document.  
"Leo?"  
"We're waiting for someone," he said simply without moving his eyes off the paper.  
"Good morning." Jed Bartlett strolled through the connecting doors between the Chief of Staff's office and the Oval Office.  
Donna tensed up next Josh, he squeezed her hand to reassure her that he was there with her and that everything was going to be okay.  
"Good morning, Mr. President," they said together.  
"Good morning, sir." Leo stood up at the President's appearance.  
"I was told there is a situation of some kind." President Bartlett looked from Donna and Josh to Leo.  
Leo nodded seriously. "C.J. called me this morning. Danny has a quote from an unnamed source that Josh and Donna are having an affair."  
"Interesting. Any pictures taken?"  
Leo glanced over at Josh. "Just the ones leaving my apartment this morning," Josh replied.  
"Donna was at your apartment this morning at five-thirty?" Bartlett asked.  
"Yes, sir."  
"What business could you possibly be conducting five-thirty in the morning on a Saturday?"  
"She wasn't there on business, sir."  
"It's all my fault. See I had dinner with Commander Reece last night and he proposed to me and then he took it back because he said that I was in love with Josh and well I got a little drunk last night and I couldn't remember where I lived or where my keys were so I just went over to Josh's I wanted to talk to him about what had happened anyway and well sir we woke up and Leo called and here we are. Mr. President we're not having an affair."  
"At least not yet," Josh muttered.  
"I'm sorry, Josh, did you say something? I didn't quite hear you."  
Josh looked at the President. "I said, at least not yet, Mr. President."  
"Are you saying that you're planning on having an affair with Donna?" Josh noticed the smirk play across his face.  
"No, sir, not an affair. See this morning I told Donna that I love her and I do very much and I fully intend to do something about it, that is if she loves me back. I understand how it looks from a PR point of view and if you want me to resign I would be happy to, but don't punish Donna."  
"Donna?" The President looked over at the stunned young woman in front of him.  
"Yes, sir?" Her voice was heavy with emotion.  
"How do you feel?"  
"About which part, sir?"  
"What Josh just said."  
"First of all if Josh resigns, I resign and second of all I love him too and would love for him to do something about it...finally."  
Bartlett couldn't help but laugh. "I'm afraid we all agree with you, Donna. Finally!"  
"What happens now?" Josh asked.  
"I definitely hate to say it like this, but there needs to be some damage control." Leo looked behind Josh and Donna.  
"That's what I'm here for."  
Josh and Donna both turned around to see C.J. and Toby standing directly behind them.  
  
After talking Josh and Donna through the next forty-eight hours of their life C.J. meandered back to her office where Danny was sitting on her couch. C.J. sat down next to him on the couch.  
"How'd it go?"  
"A lot better than I thought. Apparently right before Leo called Josh told Donna he loved her and she reciprocated his feelings right there in Leo's office." C.J. leaned towards Danny just a little. "Thanks for leaking the story for me."  
"I can't believe it took those fools so long to realize that if you're in love you should just really do something about it and not drive..."  
C.J. cut him off by pressing her lips to his. She pulled back eventually and looked at him for a reaction. "...Everyone crazy with all the sexual tension," he finished.  
"Danny?"  
"Yeah?"  
"I just kissed you."  
"I noticed that. What for?"  
"I'm sick of driving everyone crazy with the sexual tension."  
"Feel better?"  
"Danny?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you have a problem with a reporter dating the Press Secretary?"  
"No, as long as I'm the reporter and you're the Press Secretary." He smiled.  
C.J. kissed him again. "Pick me up tonight?"  
"Sure. What time?"  
"Seven?"  
"Yeah, okay." Danny stood up. "Do they know that you set them up with the press?"  
"No, and I'd like to keep it that way. I don't think a lot of people would be happy with my messing with the press just to play Yenta."  
"I don't know, I think they would be grateful."  
"I'll tell them after they've had their first child."  
  
"Josh Lyman."  
"Hi, Donna, it's Sam."  
"Hey, Sam."  
"You look good on television. Did you wear that dress just to impress the TV viewers or..."  
"Sam?"  
"Yes?"  
"Shut up!"  
"Are you and Josh finally together?"  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"It means that you're a bunch of blockheads and are you two finally together?"  
"We've told each other that we love each other and in front of the President no less, but I don't know if that means if we're together or not."  
"Blockheads."  
"Thanks, Sam. Did you call for anything or did you just call up to remind me and Josh how stupid we are?"  
"I saw you on television and wanted to know if you were okay. You and Josh looked really sweet together holding hands facing the press together."  
"I'm going to tell him you thought we looked cute and he's going to have words with you."  
"Donna, seriously, is everything okay? It's not easy having your life sprayed all over the newspapers."  
"I guess you would know with the having your picture taken with a prostitute and then running for Congress."  
"I'm calling to be nice and you're making fun of me!"  
"Sam, you called me and Josh blockheads."  
"Ask anyone they'll agree."  
"Everything's fine, Sam. It means a lot that you called."  
"Will you keep me posted?"  
"Yes, Sam."  
"Josh already promised to let me be the best man so I should be one of your first phone calls."  
"Sam!"  
"Oh come on, Donna, you've thought about it."  
"This is all your fault anyway."  
"How is it my fault?"  
"It just is. You had to be all...it just is," Donna accused.  
"Fine, I'll happily accept blame for this. It'll be in my toast as best man at your wedding."  
"Don't you have work to do?"  
"Yeah. Hey, is your boss around?"  
"No, he's still in a meeting with Leo, Toby and the President."  
"What's the meeting about?"  
"The cheese in Wisconsin, Sam."  
"I sense a tone, Donna."  
"They're discussing damage control."  
"Why aren't you in there with your man?"  
"Because I was asked to step out."  
"I have a better idea, will you patch me through to Debbie or Charlie please?"  
"Why?"  
"I have some urgent news for the President."  
"Sam!"  
"I have the number, Donna, I can just call myself."  
"Fine."  
Donna forwarded the call and smiled as she hung up.  
  
"Mr. President?" Charlie entered the Oval Office quietly.  
"Yeah?"  
"Sam Seaborn is on the phone."  
"Excellent, put him through, Charlie, and then come in here too."  
"Is this about Team Josh?"  
Josh buried his face in his hands. He mumbled something quietly.  
"I'm sorry, Josh, we couldn't hear you." The President smirked.  
Josh looked around the room. "Was that out loud?"  
"What'd you say?" Leo asked.  
"Why there's never a national emergency when you need one."  
The men erupted with laughter. Charlie came back in and put the phone on speaker next to the President.  
"Sam?"  
"Hi, Mr. President."  
"How are you?"  
"I'm well, sir. How are you?"  
"You're missing all of the fun, Sam. Did you hear what happened?"  
"I caught a little on the news and I just talked to Donna."  
"What did she say?" Josh suddenly very enthused about the conversation.  
"Hi, Josh," replied Sam.  
"Hi, Sam, what did she say?"  
"She just told me what happened between the two of you in Leo's office with the President." Sam asked. "What's going on there?"  
"Well we're talking to Josh about what his intentions are towards Donnatella Moss. She's one of the family, you know."  
"Yes, Mr. President." Josh glanced over at Toby. "You've been awfully quiet over there."  
"You going to ask her to marry you?"  
Josh's eyes widened. "Why did I even go there?"  
Toby smiled. "Pay backs a bitch!"  
"Pay back?" Josh looked over at his friend.  
"I believe Team Toby was your idea and you also spread the news about the house with Andi."  
"Ah!" Josh made a face like he was going to be sick. "I was just trying to help."  
"As am I."  
"May I be excused?" Josh asked.  
"I'm afraid we're not done here yet, Josh."  
  
It was almost lunchtime when Josh returned to his office. Donna was sitting in his chair, her legs draped over the arm of the chair and her head was resting against the back of it. He quietly closed both of the doors and approached the woman. He stared at her for a long time. She had her haired pulled back with a pen through it to hold it in place, she often did that to keep her hair out of her face. She was still wearing the red dress from the night before.  
"Donna?"'  
She opened her eyes immediately and turned to him. "I'm sorry, I just..."  
"Hey, it's okay." He kneeled down in front of her lightly stroking her calf. "We can leave now if you want."  
"Is everything okay?"  
"Everything is fine. The President has ordered us to take the rest of the weekend off and do some serious talking. Plus I'm sure you want to change into something a little less fancy. I thought I would take you to your apartment and you can do what you need to do and then I'll take you out for lunch."  
"I like that plan." Donna felt a chill run up her spine from his feather light touches.  
Josh stood up holding his hand out for hers. She accepted it and he pulled her to her feet. She was standing in front of him a little shorter than usual because she didn't have on her heels. He kissed her forehead.  
"Let's get out of here."  
"Let's!"  
A few minutes later they were strolling out of the White House. Josh's cell phone rang. He flipped it open. "Josh Lyman." His face melted into the nauseated-I'm-in-trouble-now expression. "Hi, Mom!"  
Just then Donna's phone rang too. She pulled it out of her purse. She pushed talk. "Hi, Momma." 


	5. Leaving Behind His Future

"Mom, I'm not going to...Mother!"  
Donna glanced over at Josh who was sitting in the driver's seat of his car arguing with his mother. Donna heard her Mother ranting and raving about how Donna never told her anything.  
"Donnatella Moss, I can't believe I had to hear about this through the news before I heard it from my own daughter."  
"What did Daddy say?"  
Donna heard Josh stop in mid-sentence at that question. "He can't believe you're actually part of a scandal."  
"Momma, we're not a scandal. The press got some bad information, C.J. is going to take care of it."  
"I don't care, they made you sound like some kind of hussy."  
Josh let out a frustrated cry. "Mom, don't you think that I would tell if you something like that had happened. I wasn't not telling you, this all happened very quickly. The President lectured me and so did Leo, you were my next call."  
Donna smirked. She knew that Hannah Lyman was chastising him as much as her mother was chastising her.  
"Is he there with you now?" Mrs. Moss asked.  
"What?" Donna squeaked. This wasn't good.  
"He's sitting there next to you right now, isn't he?" Her voice grew insistent.  
"Yes, Momma."  
"Put him on."  
"I can't right now, he's busy talking to his mother."  
Josh looked over at Donna with a panicked look on her face. He started shaking his head adamantly. Donna shot him a glare. Then as if on cue, Josh said, "Yeah, she's sitting right here." He glanced over at her. "She's on the phone...yes, Mother." Josh pulled the phone from his ear. "My mother would like to have a word with you."  
"My mother would like to have several with you."  
They exchanged phones.  
"Hello, Mrs. Moss." Josh greeted.  
"Hi, Mrs. Lyman."  
"Donna, dear, how are you?"  
"I'm well. How are you?"  
"I'm good, very good. You looked pretty on television this morning."  
"Thank you. Mrs. Lyman, I want you to know that Josh and I were really planning on calling you, it's just that we can't even seen to find a minute to talk to each other let alone anyone else."  
"I understand, dear. I have to read Josh the riot act, it's my job as a mother, but I just wanted to tell you that you've always been part of the family. I know Noah liked you, he thought you were good for Josh. And I just love you to pieces. You make it easier sometimes."  
"Make what easier, Mrs. Lyman?"  
  
Josh laced his fingers through Donna's as if he knew what they were talking about. "Joanie." That was the only words that she had to say and Donna understood. She felt her chest tighten with emotion.  
"I know that you and Joshua have a lot to talk about, I just wanted to tell you that I'm thrilled that you guys are finally figuring it out."  
"Figuring what out?"  
  
"That you're meant for each other."  
Donna smiled and squeezed Josh's hand. "Thank you, Mrs. Lyman."  
"Oh, call me Hannah, dear."  
"Mrs. Moss, I assure you that I love your daughter more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire life," Josh announced.  
"Who's Josh talking to?" Hannah asked.  
"My mother."  
"I'm sure she's as happy as I am."  
"She's just mad that she didn't find out before the rest of the block. She loves to be the block gossip especially when it comes to my love life."  
"It's a mother's right."  
"I haven't gotten to that yet, Mrs. Moss." Josh sounded exasperated. "That's what the President said," he chuckled. "I'm going to hand you back to your daughter now. It was very nice to talk to you."  
They exchanged phones again. "Hello, again, Mother." Josh said placing his arm along the back of Donna's chair, gently playing with her hair.  
Donna let out a small sigh. "Mom?"  
"He's a fine young man, Donnatella."  
"Yes, Mom."  
"You'll keep me posted from now on."  
"Yes."  
"I don't want to find out that you were married on the news."  
"Yes, Momma, I promise that won't happen."  
"Go be with Josh and call me later."  
"I love you. Tell Daddy I love him too."  
"I love you too, pumpkin, and I will."  
Donna flipped her phone shut just as Josh did.  
"How did it go?" Donna asked.  
"Better than expected. Your father isn't going to hunt me down and kill me is he?"  
  
"I think you're safe, just don't knock me up before we're married." Donna's eyes widened. "I mean, not that we're going to have kids or get married for that matter."  
"Donna?"  
"Yeah?"  
"You ready for some lunch?"  
  
Donna scurried into her bedroom while Josh flipped on the television to check the news. Donna caught a glimpse of their story as she was passing by. She shed her dress and lingerie and jumped quickly into the shower. She wandered into her bedroom and picked out her favorite pair of panties and bra to match. She opened her closet and pulled out a pair of jeans and a low cut, black, v-neck, shirt with three quarter sleeves. She blow dried her hair and left it down. Her golden hair glimmered as it cascaded down her shoulders. She applied a little make-up and slipped on a pair of black-heeled boots.  
She grabbed a sweater just in case it got chilly in the evening. She stepped out into the living room to find Josh yelling at the television. This was nothing new mind you, but it was always amusing.  
"Joshua."  
  
Josh turned around and felt his heart jump into his throat. Donnatella Moss had always been beautiful, but right there in that moment she had never seemed so beautiful and it was because she was dressed and made up just for him and him alone. He felt himself get all puffed up when he realized he was going to have the hottest lunch date in the history of hot lunch dates.  
"You look amazing."  
Donna beamed at him. "Are you ready or did you want to yell at MSNBC some more?"  
He shut off the television without taking his eyes off of her. "I'm ready." He stood up and held his hand out for hers.  
"Stop that."  
"What?"  
"Looking at me like you haven't seen me in years."  
"You don't understand, Donnatella Moss, this is the first time that I get to look at you and know that you're all mine, plunging neckline and all."  
Donna glanced down at her chest and back up at Josh. "Feed me, Joshua."  
They arrived at the restaurant a few minutes later. He opened the doors for her and pulled out the chair for her. He was being the perfect gentleman. They were seated in a corner of the restaurant away from the main hustle and bustle of the dinning room.  
They ordered their food and chatted lightly about things.  
"J!" Donna felt herself glaring at the woman approaching their table.  
Josh turned around in his chair and then glanced back at Donna. "Amy, hi."  
"Donna." Amy didn't hide her dissatisfaction.  
"Amy." Donna didn't either.  
"I saw a silly little news cast today that said you two were having an affair," Amy sputtered.  
"Funny, I saw the same one. Well you know what they say, if it's on television it must be true," Josh sneered.  
"You're a couple now? Did you resign from the White House?"  
"Yes and no. In fact the President gave his blessing along with Leo, Toby, C.J. and the entire White House Press Corp and I think, yeah, Sam too."  
"I guess that answers that, huh, Donna?" Amy peered over Josh's shoulder to Donna.  
"I guess it does."  
"Answers what?" Josh asked looking between the women.  
"Just girl talk," Amy sneered.  
"It was lovely bumping into you like this," Donna dismissed Amy casually.  
"I just wanted to ask Josh why he didn't come by last night like he said he was."  
Donna registered the guilt on Josh's face and knew she wasn't lying. "Funny, when I found him he wasn't going anywhere in his socks."  
Amy glowered at both of them. "It's okay, I'm not into pity fucks anyway."  
"Really? I thought you'd be used to them by now." Amy snorted something and turned around making sure to give her hips an extra shake as she walked out. Josh wasn't even facing her.  
"Listen, Donna..."  
"Josh, spare me the excuses, okay. You were mad at me so you were going to go sleep with her. Why? Just to make me jealous?"  
  
"I called her that's true and yeah a part of me wanted to hurt you the way you had hurt me by going out with Jack, but once I hung up I had no intentions of following through."  
"You know what, Josh, we're not a couple, I mean I don't know what we are, but maybe we should just stop this before we end up drowning in guilt and regret." Donna stood up.  
"Donna, please." He stood up to block her.  
"Are you going to call her every time you get mad at me?"  
"Are you going to go out on a date with an ex-boyfriend every time you're mad at me?"  
"This was a mistake. We're obviously not ready for this. Maybe we never will be." Donna knew that Josh would reach for her if she tried to pass him. She looked over at him, his pained expression and his sad brown eyes.  
"Donna," he whispered.  
She turned away from him and walked out.  
  
"What do you mean you walked out?" C.J. cried on the other side of the line.  
Donna was sobbing in the cab on the way back to her apartment. "What was I supposed to do, just sit there and be okay with the fact that he called her?!"  
"Donna, you went out with Jack and Jack proposed to you and Josh was just happy you came to him instead. Shouldn't you be glad that he wasn't with her at all?"  
Donna thought about it for a long time.  
"Donna? You still there?"  
"Yeah."  
"You and Josh have come too far for all of it to be ruined by Amy Gardner before you even get a chance to really start."  
Donna heard a voice in the background. "C.J., do you have company?"  
"Yeah."  
"Who?"  
"Never you mind. You have to go back and find Josh and tell him that you want a clean, clean slate and start over."  
"C.J., we told each other we loved each other like six hours ago and already we're having issues. This isn't a good sign."  
  
"Ye have little faith, mi compadre." C.J. paused and the male voice in the background was talking again. "That's right. Donna, do you remember Inauguration night when he came to you after you lied to everyone about the quote and you called you on it. He threw snowballs at your window. It doesn't get more romantic than that."  
"C.J., he got back together with her right after Zoey was brought back safely. They broke up right before all the crap happened last October. I can't and I won't compete with her."  
"Oh for crying out loud, I'm pretty sure he couldn't stand her half the time. This isn't some romance movie. Shit happens. Look, you guys are past all of that, you finally admitted your feelings which means that the games are over now you can just be together."  
"I think...you know this is just all wrong. I'm his assistant, C.J., and I shouldn't be dating my boss." She took a long, shaky breath in. "I think it's for the better."  
"Donna," C.J. sighed. "Don't do this, you'll regret it."  
"I have to go." Donna disconnected the phone before C.J. could argue. The cab pulled up in front of her house. She paid the cab and got out. When she arrived Josh was sitting on her front steps.  
Donna stood frozen on the sidewalk. He stood up and approached her.  
"Let me say what I have to say, Josh. I've spent six years being your assistant and most of that six years loving you. But right now I don't think we should be together. I think that it's too confusing. We're both still raw from many other things. I just think that maybe we rushed this. I think we should take some time and reflect and figure some things out. Maybe after the term, three more years, it's nothing after the last six. I'm your assistant and we're supposed to be held to a higher standard. I think as long as you're my boss we shouldn't be together. It all gets far too complicated."  
"I quit then," Josh said simply.  
"Josh, this is your dream job, you can't quit."  
"Then you're fired."  
"Josh!"  
"Tell me what to do, I'll do it. I refuse for this to be the end of something we never even got started. I can't be so bad at relationships that I end one before it even starts."  
"It's not your fault. The last month things have been so out of control. Starting with the whole abortion clinic incident. It started a chain reaction and we started being selfish. We're in the White House, Joshua. We need to act like it." She looked down at the ground so she wouldn't have to see his face.  
"Donna, I won't give up on us."  
"There's always hope, but I think it's better this way."  
"Donna."  
She headed for her apartment. "Josh, go home, I promise in a couple of hours you'll see it my way."  
He didn't say anything; he just watched her walk up the steps and into the apartment building. He stood there for a long time, he thought he saw Donna's silhouette in her window. Finally he turned around and left leaving his future behind him. 


	6. Remarkable

Josh stared through the glass. Doctors and nurses surrounded Donna. The words 'pulmonary embolism' kept circling his mind. His father had died from that very thing. He watched with antagonizing nausea as the doctors tried to repair her.  
The last couple of months had been hard. After Donna had told him that they were not going to finally start their relationship, he had sort of punished her. He didn't want her to leave him as an assistant if he couldn't have her any other way. He kept her doing brainless stuff. She was better than that and he knew it. Finally he had relented. He sent her to Gaza with other projects behind it for her to up and get a promotion within a month or so and then he would be searching for a replacement for an irreplaceable person. He knew it would be hard, but Donna deserved better. She was smart and she had the potential to be better than an assistant. To him she was his partner but he could see how it would be harder for her to see it that way.  
Josh shook his head, what had he been thinking sending her to Gaza?  
Between the heart break of seeing Donna broken and bruised in a hospital bed in Germany he had to watch I'm-too-sexy-for-my-camera kiss her and fawn all over her. She apparently was now into dating new people and had completely forgotten all about him. His heart had plummeted to his feet when he saw the British Heartthrob lean over the hospital bed and kiss Donna. Now he was staring through a glass window waiting to see if she was going to live or die.  
His cell phone rang. He muted the ring and headed out into the main part of the hospital. "Josh Lyman."  
"It's me."  
"Hi, Toby," Josh replied numbly.  
"What happened?" Toby's voice was full of concern.  
"She's...she developed a pulmonary embolism...she's...they're operating on her now to try and remove it."  
"Josh?" Josh could hear Toby's concern. "She's going to be okay, Josh. She's a strong girl. You didn't see her when you got shot, she's a strong girl."  
"Yeah, Toby, but her body's so frail. I don't know what I'm going to do if I lose her."  
"You're going to do what you should've done a long time ago. I don't care if you have to kidnap her to make her see the light."  
Josh chuckled at Toby's somewhat romantic side. "Toby, it's not meant to end like this right?" He did everything he could to keep from crying. "It's not meant to be an endless string of tragedies with some good moments in between, right?"  
"Why do you think I've been working so hard in the White House and not seeing my children? I can't face them until I know I've made this world better for them."  
Josh was surprised by Toby's statement. "You're a good man, Toby."  
"Josh, she's going to be okay."  
"Her Mom is going to be here soon, how am I going to tell her?"  
"Josh, this isn't your fault."  
Josh was back in front of Donna's operating room. Her blonde hair was draping off the operating table as he peered inside.  
  
"Toby?" C.J. slowly crept inside his office as Toby hung up the phone.  
His glossy, pained brown eyes looked up at C.J. "What happened?" she whispered.  
"Donna has a pulmonary embolism, she's in surgery right now."  
"Oh, god!" She covered her mouth. "Josh?"  
"Blaming himself like always. I swear to god, C.J., if she doesn't pull through this I'm going to quit. Josh has had enough tragedy in his life. We all have."  
"Toby," C.J. said gently. "You can't quit, not now."  
"I'm going to go give Leo an update." Toby stormed past C.J. down the hall and into Leo's office area. "Margaret, is he available?"  
"Yeah, go on in."  
He heard her stand up and follow him in.  
Leo peered up from his paper. "What's up, Toby?"  
"It's Donna."  
  
Colin Ayres is pacing in front of Donna's empty room when Josh approaches. "She's in surgery," he manages to say.  
"What happened?" Josh was aggravated by Colin's concern.  
"She has a blood clot."  
"Bloody hell." Colin leaned back against the wall. "How long ago?"  
"About two hours."  
Josh peered into her room; they had cleaned up the room. It looked like it was waiting for the next patient. He slowly stepped inside trying to stay calm.  
"Do you mind if I wait with you?"  
Josh didn't respond, he just sat down and stared at the black television screen.  
"She's a rather remarkable girl, Josh, I wouldn't..."  
"Why does everyone keep telling me that? Why is that supposed to make me feel better?" Josh's voice was low and harsh. "Does everyone really think I'm that stupid? That I don't see how remarkable she is, how wonderful she is, and how completely amazing she is. I've worked with the girl for nearly six in a half years. She's opened my eyes to things I would've never seen without her, she always keeps going. She stayed by my side everyday after I was shot, she knew before anyone that I had PTSD; she even took me to the hospital that night to get my hand checked out. She's just amazing. She comes to after being in a car bomb and she's concerned because I haven't shaved? The girl is crazy but she's amazing...so I don't need you to tell me that she's remarkable and she'll pull through." Josh turned to face Colin who was standing in the doorway. "That's not the problem, the problem is, I've seen remarkable people die."  
Colin's expression shifted slightly. "You're in love with her."  
"Wouldn't you be?"  
"A few days and I'm completely smitten. She didn't mention that there was something going on between the two of you," he said quietly.  
"There's not."  
"Would you be more comfortable if I left?"  
"Donna would want you to be here."  
"Does she know how you feel?"  
"She did, I don't know anymore."  
"You should tell her."  
"Why would you encourage something like that?"  
"I'm not someone to stand in front of, as corny as it might sound, true love." Colin looked back in the hallway as if he were searching for her. "Something tells me she isn't either."  
Josh continued to stare into the blank television but he felt like there might be a little more hope. Colin sat down next to Josh and they let the silence drift over them.  
  
The President wandered into Toby's office. It was nearly eleven o'clock at night. Toby immediately stood up at his presence. "Good evening, sir."  
"Keep your seat. I just came to see how you were doing. With all of the commotion I haven't had a lot of time for well anything."  
"I'm fine, sir."  
"Andi?"  
"She'll be home in the morning."  
"Very good." He glanced around the room. "Any word on Donna?"  
"She's in surgery for a blood clot, sir."  
"Josh?"  
"Going a little crazy as we all are, sir."  
He nodded solemnly.  
"Are you okay, Mr. President?"  
"I don't know, Toby. I didn't think anything could feel worse than Rosslyn and now I've got a whole new marker. First Josh and then Donna, I swear if those two don't get their heads out of their asses I'm going to give an executive order for them to get married in the Oval Office. The same goes for you and Andi."  
"With all due respect, sir, I asked her many times to marry me."  
"Find a way, Toby. Life's short."  
"Yes, Mr. President."  
"Mr. President?" Charlie appeared in the doorway.  
"Yeah?"  
"They need you in the situation room."  
President Bartlett let out a long sigh and nodded. Just before he left Toby's office he turned and said, "Find a way."  
  
C.J. curled up next to Danny's body; he wrapped his arm around her and held her securely to him. "You guys have seen bad before."  
"This is worse."  
"Yeah."  
"Two of my good friends are suffering and there's nothing I can do about it. The President has to make the biggest decision of not only his life but of the country's life. Two congressmen, an aide and Admiral Fitzwallace are dead. Andi was nearly killed, Toby is ready to give up if Donna doesn't make it, and god only knows what will happen to Josh if she doesn't make it. Leo and the President are not on good speaking terms. Danny, it doesn't get any worse than this."  
"Yeah." Danny squeezed her gently. "You know I love you, right?"  
C.J. had her head rested against his chest; she peered up at him and smiled. "I think I knew that. I love you too."  
"It can only get better, C.J."  
"One can only hope."  
  
"Josh Lyman."  
"Josh, it's Sam."  
"You heard?"  
"I just talked to Toby."  
"Yeah."  
"Any word?"  
"No."  
"Do you want me to come out there?"  
"No."  
Colin whispered to Josh, "I'm going to go get some coffee, would you like some?"  
Josh nodded and watched the man disappear.  
"Who was that?"  
"Donna's boyfriend."  
"Her what?"  
"Apparently she met him in Gaza, they had a thing. He has expertly deduced that I'm in love with her and that I should tell her how I feel." Josh needed a good vent. He hadn't had one since he was standing outside the Oval Office and lightly suggested that they kill everyone.  
"So he's a smart guy," Sam said sarcastically.  
"Oh yeah, and British. He's this I'm-too-sexy-for-my-camera-belongs- on-the-cover-of-a-romance-novel photographer guy. Donna was all happy to see him and they were kissing and I'm pretty sure that I'm going to kill something in about a minute."  
"Let's hope the guy takes his time getting coffee. I don't want to have to bail you out of a German prison."  
"Mr. Lyman?"  
Josh turned and saw the doctor standing in the doorway. He stood up feeling his stomach twist and turn as he walked over to him.  
"Mr. Lyman, Donna is going to be just fine. We were able to get the clot out and she stable. She'll be put back in her room in a couple of hours."  
Josh felt his knees start to shake; he wavered a bit and then stumbled backwards to lean back on the chair. "She's okay, are you sure?"  
The doctor smiled. "I'm sure, Mr. Lyman. I'll let you see her in a little while."  
"She's okay?" Sam cried from the phone.  
The doctor left the room. "Yeah, she's...they...she's in the recovery room."  
Colin returned with two cups of coffee just in time to hear Josh's news. Josh accepted the coffee from Colin, and nodded a 'thank you.'  
"You should call Toby, he's worried."  
"Yeah." Josh felt kind of dazed. "Thanks for calling, Sam."  
"You should sleep soon too."  
"Yeah, okay. I'll call you later."  
Josh pressed Toby's number into his phone and waited. Toby answered, "How is she?"  
"She's going to be okay." Josh felt himself smile for the first time.  
"Oh thank god!"  
"I don't know about you, man, but I think it's time to reopen 'Team Toby' and 'Team Josh' before we lose again."  
"I'll second that."  
"Call me after you see her."  
"Yeah."  
Josh flipped his phone closed and took a big gulp of his coffee. "Thanks for the coffee."  
"No problem," Colin said quietly.  
"Maybe we should try eating something real, we won't be able to see her for a couple of hours."  
Colin smirked, "You asking me out, Josh?"  
Josh rolled his eyes. "You should be so lucky."  
  
It was nearly dawn when Donna's eyes fluttered open. She had been having such weird dreams about her life. The first thing she saw was Josh's sleeping form. She would smile if she could remember how. He looked so peaceful.  
"Hi, you." She heard Colin's voice next to her. She shifted her head slowly and found the handsome man staring at her with an angelic face.  
"You're still here," she whispered.  
"I just wanted to say good-bye."  
"Where are you going?" She would pout if she could remember how.  
"You're in good hands here. Josh says your mom will be here this morning. I think it's best if I leave. Plus I've got some stuff I need to do."  
Donna looked at him for a long moment. She glanced over at Josh and then back at Colin. "Did something..."  
Colin cut her off. "He's a good man, Donna. You're in good hands." He leaned forward and gently kissed her forehead.  
  
Josh woke up to the sound of the nurse's voice. "How are you feeling?"  
Josh sprang up from his chair. He approached the hospital bed slowly. "Hi," he said quietly.  
"You look awful."  
He smiled. "You look wonderful." Something occurred to Josh and he looked around the room. There was no sign of Colin or his belongings.  
"He left earlier."  
Josh turned his attention back to Donna. "He's a good guy."  
Donna made a face.  
"What?"  
"You sounded all mature and grown up."  
"I can grow."  
She gave him a look and he knew that if she had the power, her brow would've been cocked. "I can," he argued.  
"Just hand me my water, would you." Her voice was still weak, along with the rest of her body but he could hear the humor in her voice.  
He smiled and held her water for her while she drank. "You're remarkable, Donnatella Moss." 


	7. Recovery

"Josh, you have to go back to work."  
"I don't like the idea of leaving you here," he argued.  
Donna gave him a look. "Joshua, I'm sitting in the middle of a German hospital, in you know, Germany, what do you think could possibly happen to me?"  
"I'll go home when you go home," he remarked crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly.  
"Josh, that's weeks away. The country needs you."  
"You know what, they brought Angela in once they can do it again. I'm replaceable."  
"Josh," Donna growled. "I'm fine, I'm going to keep on being fine. My Mother left two days ago. I have a lot of rehab to go through and then I'll be coming home. Will you just go back to work!"  
"Do you really want me to leave?"  
Donna looked at him for a minute. "Not really, no," she admitted.  
"Then why are you pushing?"  
"Josh, you have to get back to work. You can't be sitting in your..."  
"So help me god, Donna, if you say assistant," Josh warned.  
Donna closed her mouth. "You have to go back to work."  
Josh sat down in the chair and huffed, "I know."  
"Then why are you fighting me on this?"  
"Because the first time I let you out of my sight you were in a car bomb in Gaza, the second time I let you out of my sight you had a blot clot!" He didn't mean to yell, the emotions were rocking his insides and he couldn't seem to get a hold of himself.  
"Josh, this isn't your fault." She held her hand out for his. He stood up and placed his hand in hers. "I get you, I get what's going on inside you and this isn't your fault."  
"Donna," he whispered in protest.  
"Josh, you need to go back to DC. You need to go back to your job. I talked to Leo's, he's hired you a new assistant. They need you. The country needs you. I promise I'm going to be okay."  
Josh caressed her hand lightly with his own and stared at her for a long moment. "One more night and you have the nurse call me if your temperature changes one degree."  
"Agreed." She nodded.  
He pulled her hand up to his lips and lightly kissed the palm of her hand. "Let's see what they've brought you for breakfast."  
  
"Josh is coming home tomorrow."  
Toby peered up from his desk. "Really? Who twisted his arm?"  
C.J. plopped down on his couch. "Donna, who else?"  
"I wonder how the hell she managed that." Toby ran his hands over his face. "It'll be so nice to see them walking down the hall arguing about the latest inane trivia she's found. I can't wait for that." He let out a long sigh.  
"Yeah." C.J. smiled faintly at the thought of the two of them bantering.  
"Who did you talk to?"  
"Donna, she called when Josh went to clean up a bit after breakfast."  
"How does she sound?"  
"She sounds good."  
"Good."  
"How's Andi?"  
"She's good. She's glad all the funerals are taken care of and she just wants to relax."  
"Huck and Molly?"  
"They're good."  
"Toby, we've got three more years left and I'm not sure how much more disaster and bad news I can take. Doesn't it have to get better at some point?"  
"It will, we always recover."  
"Yeah, but how long until the next bomb goes off?"  
  
Josh wasn't sure what time it was when he woke up. He looked around the room, it was darker than normal, but there was still plenty of light so the nurses could move in and out of the room, see what the need to see and not disturb anyone. He stood up out of the chair and walked over to Donna's bedside.  
He had told her that if he was leaving in the morning that he refused to spend his last night in the hotel room. She finally relented but told him that she didn't want to hear about his aching back.  
He carefully moved a strand of hair out of her face and lightly caressed her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open and Josh retracted his hand.  
"If I am going to be attuned to you, you're going to have to learn how to sleep," she murmured.  
"Sorry." He managed a weak smile and looked down when he felt her hand slip into his.  
"I was joking. Don't you have a sense of humor at three o'clock in the morning?"  
"I want to stay," he said desperately.  
"Joshua, you can't."  
"I can. The country doesn't need me."  
"They do. I'll be home soon enough and you can bother me at home as much as you want."  
"You bet your ass, but I still don't want to go home."  
"Josh, Leo was really nice to let you come here in the first place. You need to go back. They need your help. You can only take so much vacation."  
"Everyone understands why I am here."  
"I know, Josh, but the thing is, I'm your friend and your assistant and while I know that everyone seems to understand that, you have to go back to work."  
"Yeah." Josh felt his anger stirring.  
"You should get some more sleep. You have to be at the airport in a couple of hours." Josh leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "Yeah."  
  
Donna woke up feeling a little disoriented. When she finally realized where she was and what had happened she looked around for Josh. He wasn't anywhere to be seen. In fact all of his belongings were gone as well. The nurse came in a few minutes later, she smiled warmly. "Your man left this for you. He said he couldn't bare to wake you up." Donna didn't correct the woman even though she felt like saying, 'he's not my man, he should be, but we're a bunch of blockheads according to my best friend, so we're just friends and co-workers.' The nurse handed her an envelope and a rose. Donna carefully opening the letter up and squeaked when something shiny rolled out of the envelope. She picked it up and her heart drummed in her ears. She opened the letter and immediately recognized Josh's handwriting.  
  
_Dearest Donnatella,  
  
I'm sorry I didn't wake you to say good-bye, I was afraid I wouldn't be able to leave, and we've had that conversation too many times. The argument I wanted to have was that if I was your husband no one would question me staying in Germany with you until you were released for home. In fact I bet the President would've made it an executive order had I tried to come back. He would've done the same for Toby if Andi had been in your place. In fact I think the President is going to order them to get married some day soon.  
What I'm saying is that months ago when we were going to try 'us' I knew exactly what I wanted. After that first kiss, it opened my eyes and suddenly I knew exactly what I wanted my future to look like.  
Then when you told me that we had to stay friends and co-workers I never fully accepted it and I held this in my pocket...until today.  
Today I have decided that it's time for me to really move on. You obviously have. I don't mean that to sound as jealous and jaded as it sounded, even though it's how I feel at the moment. I'm glad you were able to find happiness after all the ups and downs of what we've been through. Colin is a decent guy and whether or not you end up with him I know that you'll find someone.  
I couldn't bear to take the ring back to the store and I couldn't bear to keep it, it belongs to you anyway, do what you will with it.  
_ _ I think you're right that it was time for me to go. Now we can both start our full recovery and when you come home...life will be just as you left it.  
For the last time, I love you Donnatella Moss.  
Best Wishes for a speedy recovery, I'll be in touch.  
  
Your dearest friend,  
  
Josh  
_  
Donna looked over at the engagement ring shimmering in her hand and started to cry. At least now she had the time and the space to make the recoveries that she needed to make, her broken leg and her broken heart.  
  
"Josh, there's a Donna on the phone for you."  
He looked up from his desk to see Ginger standing in the doorway. He glanced at his phone. When he opened his mouth she held up her hand.  
"I'm not lying for you again. It's been over a week. Talk to the poor girl," she snapped. "Line two." And she left.  
Josh looked at the blinking light. He hadn't talk to her since before he left Germany. He felt guilty, mad and embarrassed about the letter he wrote. He regretted every second of giving her the ring. She should've never known about the damn ring.  
He let out a frustrated sigh and picked up the phone. "Donna?"  
"I thought you were going to avoid me until I came back to work."  
"I haven't been avoiding you."  
"Really? Then why haven't I heard from you?"  
"There is a time difference, I didn't want to bother you."  
"You are so full of crap."  
"I'm talking to you now aren't I?"  
"That's just because I told Ginger that if you aren't on the phone in one minute I was going to call Toby and see what he thought of you avoiding me, then I was going to call the President."  
"You're the one that sent me back to work," he accused.  
"That's right. You know what, that's fine. You call me when you're ready to talk," she snapped and hung up the phone.  
"Donna, wait!"  
She had already hung up. He slammed the phone down and let out a disgruntled growl. He stormed out of his office and into Toby's office. He flopped down on his couch and waited for Toby to acknowledge him.  
"Ginger made you take the call didn't she?" Toby peered around the newspaper he was reading. It was Saturday and a rather slow day.  
"I thought I had closure and that I would be able to start moving on, but every time Ginger tells me she's on the phone I want to hide under my desk and I can't bring myself to call her back."  
"Just so you know she's ordered everyone to stop giving you updates on her health, including the nurses, you are to talk to her directly for any privileged information." Toby paused and looked up at his friend again. "And how the hell do you expect to get over her, closure or not? You know damn well it's going to be impossible and you know damn well she's going to come around at some point."  
"I don't think so. I really think she's likes Mr. Photogenic. I guess I should be grateful that he isn't a damn Republican, cause those are the ones that usually end up screwing me in the end as much as they screw her."  
"Oh yeah, you're moving on," Toby muttered sarcastically.  
"It's been a week, Toby."  
"It's been a week, you're avoiding her calls, still talking, thinking about her every second of the day and you're avoiding her. You should've stayed in Germany."  
"She wouldn't let me."  
"What happened in Germany, Josh, why are things so off balance all of the sudden?"  
Josh hadn't told a soul about the letter or the ring. He just said that they left on awkward terms and everyone else wrote their own version of what happened.  
"I didn't say good-bye to her before I left. I wrote her a letter and I left something with her."  
"What did the letter say?"  
"You would be interested in the writing wouldn't you?"  
"I'm the communications director, it's my job to know what the message is that we're putting out there."  
"I told her I loved her for the last time. I told her that it was obvious that she had moved on and that I should too."  
"There's something else. That's not a big deal."  
Josh let out a frustrated sigh. "In the envelope I left her the engagement ring I've been carrying around for months. I told her I couldn't bear to take it back and I didn't want to keep it, I said she could do what she wanted to do with it."  
"You didn't buy an engagement ring, did you?"  
Josh looked a little alarmed. She slowly shook his head. "It was my Grandmother's. It was supposed to go to Joanie but..."  
Toby nodded. "You gave her an engagement ring and told her you were moving on?"  
Josh suddenly felt sick to his stomach. "You do not under any circumstances have to tell me what an idiot I am, believe me I am fully aware. By the time I realized it I was stuck 30,000 feet in the air for ten hours. Otherwise I would've rectified the problem before she even knew about it."  
"What happened when you talked to her today?"  
"She was mad at me because I was avoiding her and I told her I wasn't and well it turns out that she's not dumb and that she knows me entirely too well and she hung up on me telling me to call her when I was ready to talk to her."  
"Josh, stop treating her like she's done something wrong."  
"Yeah."  
"Go call her, you'll feel better."  
"Yeah."  
  
"He did what?" Sam squeaked.  
"He didn't tell you?" Donna asked.  
"Not hardly. I don't think he will either. He doesn't like to admit to people when he's made a mistake."  
"He doesn't think it's a mistake. You don't leave your Grandmother's wedding ring with someone and tell them that they're moving on, without knowing exactly what you're doing."  
"I think he felt really burned that Colin was there and then you kept telling him to go back to work. I think he felt like it was really over between the two of you and that it was time for him to move on."  
"He needed to go back to work, Sam. You know that and I know that."  
"I'm not arguing with you, but if the love of my life was going to be sitting I a hospital in Germany you could bet I would careless about work. In fact you're not the love of my life and I still want to be sitting in Germany, but I've managed some self-control so I think you should give Josh a little credit here."  
"Yeah, except now that he's managed his closure and moved on he won't even speak to me. He won't take my calls and he doesn't call me back. He always tells someone to say hi for him. He's constantly pestering everyone about how I'm doing but he won't talk to me. That's the most annoying thing in the entire world."  
"I know I'm one of the people he pesters."  
"What am I supposed to do, Sam?"  
"Do you love him?"  
"That's a stupid question."  
"No so stupid. You were dating Mr. Photogenic...I mean the photographer guy."  
"Mr. Photogenic? Josh came up with that one didn't he. He damn well knows Colin's name. Why does he have to keep coming up with really annoying names for my ex-boyfriends. Dr. Freeride, Commander Wonderful, and now Mr. Photogenic? I never did that with any of his...except maybe Amy but that was pretty basic. I don't think 'Bitch' can really be construed as the same thing, do you?"  
Sam chuckled. "He's jealous, Donna."  
"Well he has a stupid way of showing it!" she snarled.  
"Call him again."  
"No!" Donna snapped. "I'm done calling him, if he wants to talk to me, he'll call."  
"Okay. You're right," Sam tried to say in a soothing voice.  
"Sam?"  
"Yeah?"  
"How is he?"  
  
"Donnatella Moss's room please." Josh waited while he was transferred to her room.  
"Hello?"  
"Hi, Donna."  
There was a long silence. "I didn't expect to hear from you so soon."  
"How are you?"  
"Physical therapy sucks."  
"You always used to call me a big baby."  
"Only to make you work harder. And secretly you love to prove me wrong, cause you don't get to do it very often if ever."  
"Boy isn't that the truth." Josh smirked. "You sound good."  
"I'm starting to feel almost human again."  
"Good. I'm glad. The sooner you get better the sooner you come home."  
"I didn't think you would be very excited about that. It sounded like you needed some time."  
"I've had time. In fact way too much of it, so if you could just hurry your recovery along that'd be great."  
"You never were one for patience."  
"No."  
Donna chortled lightly, "How's work?"  
"It's work. It feels okay to be back here. I still wish I was there with you."  
"Yeah? With the bad hospital food and all?"  
"Bad hospital food and all."  
"Josh?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Why do I have your Grandmother's wedding ring?"  
Josh swallowed hard. "It was burning a hole in my pocket. It belongs to you," he whispered. "How did you know that it was my Grandmother's ring?"  
"You told me about it when you and Mandy were on good terms during the campaign."  
"That's right."  
"So what should you be doing instead of chatting with me?"  
"I've got staff in...five minutes."  
She could picture him looking at his watch. "Josh, you need to go to staff now."  
"Why?  
"Because your watch sucks!"  
"It's new."  
"It was new three two ago and you still haven't replaced the battery like I told you to. Get going."  
Josh flipped open his cell phone, sure enough his watch was six minutes behind.  
"Debbie isn't going to let you in the meeting if you're not there in like a minute. And don't forget your folder."  
"I'll call you later, okay? I promise."  
"I know," she paused. "Josh?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Was it really the last time?"  
He didn't have to ask what she was talking about. He looked over at the picture he found of him and Donna from the Ignaruation night last year. Their arms were wrapped around each other and he was in the middle of telling her to address him as 'Wild Thing' from now on. He smiled, "How could it possibly be the last time?"  
"You'll be late."  
"I'll call you later."  
He hung up the phone and hurried it to the Oval Office. Toby, C.J., Charlie and Debbie were all chatting animatedly as he approached.  
"What are we talking about?" he asked.  
"That would be Team Josh," Charlie annoucned.  
Josh grinned, dimples and all for the first time in days. 


	8. Invaulable

"Thank you, Mr. President." Toby, C.J., Josh and Leo started filing out of the Oval Office.  
"Josh?"  
Josh turned around as everyone left and faced the President. "Yes, sir."  
"How's she doing?"  
"Donna?"  
"Yes, Donna. I know how the First Lady is doing."  
Josh smiled. "She's doing well. Everyday she's getting stronger. She thinks they might release her in a week or so."  
"That's excellent. Have you two gotten back on track?"  
"Sir?" Josh felt himself blush slightly.  
"Don't play stupid with me. You're not very good at playing stupid, you're too cocky for it."  
"Honestly, sir, we're just friends and well co-workers."  
"You're not co-workers at the moment." The President cocked an eyebrow.  
"Yes, sir."  
"Do I need to make an executive order, Joshua?"  
Josh shook his head. "No, sir. I just don't think we're in the same place right now."  
"You'll get there though."  
"I hope so, sir."  
"You had better and you can take that as an order."  
"Yes, sir."  
"Good, now get back to work."  
"Yes, sir. Thank you, Mr. President."  
Josh wandered back to his office he was intercepted by C.J. "Josh, have you talked to Donna?"  
"Yeah, this morning."  
"How's she doing?"  
"She's good. She sounds really good."  
C.J. smiled. "Great. I gotta go right now, but I'll see you in a bit."  
"Akay." Josh looked at her curiously and then headed to his desk.  
"Josh!"  
Josh turned around and saw Toby heading toward him. "What's up, Toby?"  
"Have you talked to Donna today?"  
"Yeah, this morning. Why is everyone asking me this? She talks to all of you."  
"How is she?" Toby asked ignoring him.  
"She's great. They're talking about releasing her next week I guess."  
"That's good." Toby replied.  
"Man, you're freaking me out. What is with everyone?"  
Toby just shrugged and moved down the hallway. As Josh moved closer to his desk he ran into Ginger and Carol. "Hi, Josh."  
"Hi, ladies."  
"Have you heard from Donna today?"  
Josh just looked at the girls in horror and pushed past them and headed for is office. It was only a few feet away when his cell phone went off.  
"Josh Lyman."  
"Hi, Josh, it's Sam."  
"Hey, how's it going?"  
"Good, how about you?"  
"Real good."  
"Can I just say that people are acting very weird."  
"Really? Have you heard from Donna today?"  
Josh pulled the phone away from his ear and stared at. He quickly bolted into his office and closed the door. He stared at the door and put the phone back up to his ear.  
"Josh?" Sam was calling for him.  
"Yeah."  
"Donna, have you heard from her today?"  
"Yeah, I talked to her this morning. Why?"  
"How's she doing?"  
"She's good. Why do you know something I don't know?"  
"Where are you?"  
"I'm standing in my office."  
"Really?"  
"Yeah, why?"  
"Does anything look different?" Josh could hear the humor in his tone.  
Josh was really confused about what was going on. He turned around and felt his heart slam into his throat. "Donna!"  
There she was sitting behind his desk. Her face was full of color, the scrapes and bruises were mostly healed. Her shimmering blonde hair was longer than he remembered and it flowed down her shoulders.  
"Call me back later." He heard Sam disconnect.  
Josh couldn't stop smiling. "Hi."  
"Hello." She was beaming at him. "I wanted it to be a surprise."  
"I'm very, very surprised and very, very happy to see you."  
"I'd hug you, but I'm still getting used to his damn wheel chair and I can't stand up, so..."  
Josh approached her. She wheeled out from behind his desk and opened her arms. He leaned down and hugged her lightly.  
"I'm not going to break, Joshua," she whispered. She felt his arms tighten around her.  
He couldn't believe how good she smelled. Her breath was warm on his neck. He wanted to pinch himself; it had felt like forever since he had seen her. He tucked his head into the crook of her neck and let out a heavy sigh.  
Once he finally released her he held on to her hand and leaned against his desk. "It's really good to see you."  
She grinned at him. "This place is a mess, Joshua," she scolded.  
"What can I say, this place runs like a fine oiled machine when you're around but leave it up to me and I'm afraid...well just look."  
"I see that. You should get another assistant."  
"Ginger and Bonnie help out all I need."  
There was a small knock at the door. Josh released Donna's hand self- consciously and called, "Come in."  
"I'm sorry, I couldn't wait any longer." C.J. entered the office. "Hi, Donna!"  
The two women embraced and Josh got out of their way. Suddenly everyone started filtering into his office greeting Donna. Josh stood in the background just watching. A familiar voice sounded next to him.  
"I had Abbey pick her up this morning, she was waiting in the residence until you came to Staff."  
Josh looked over at the President. "Thank you, sir."  
"Leo told me that she's going to be starting a new position when she comes back to work."  
"Yes, sir."  
"That'll be good for her."  
Josh nodded. "She's a bright girl. She's done a lot and she deserves to spread her wings."  
Soon everyone had cleared out and Josh was left alone with Donna once again. "Quite the welcoming committee."  
"I still can't believe the First Lady came to the airport to pick me up. She was so gracious and kind."  
"You know you're one of the family here."  
"I know, but my head still goes, 'the First Lady is sitting next to me,' you know?"  
"Yeah, I know." Josh looked around the room.  
"How much longer do you have to have the cast on?"  
"Hopefully not very much longer." Donna glanced down at her fingers; she was fidgeting with her West Wing security pass.  
"Has Leo talked to you yet?"  
"About the job?"  
"Yeah."  
"Yeah, I talked to him yesterday when I was talking to Margaret."  
"And?"  
"Are you okay with it?"  
"Donna, it was my idea."  
"I know, but I can't help but think he did that when you were mad at me."  
Josh rolled his eyes. "Don't you think I would keep you working for me if I wanted to torture you."  
"That's an excellent point. So, Gaza was my last job as Senior Assistant to the Deputy Chief of Staff for Strategic Planning?"  
"That's right. When you come back to work for the White House, you won't come to the West Wing, you'll be reporting to OEOB."  
"Who's going to be your assistant?"  
"Leo has ordered me to ask you to help find one that will be suitable for me. He says that you're the only one qualified to find the right person for the job."  
Donna smirked. "Leo has a fair point," she replied. "Of course I'll help with the interviews."  
"Help? You'll be running the interviews, I'm not allowed to have a say."  
Donna just laughed. "Okay. I can start doing that next week. I'm sure there will be tons of people lined up to help the Deputy Chief of Staff."  
Josh scoffed, "Don't bet on it."  
  
"Kelli, how would you describe yourself?"  
Donna stared at the younger woman with a skeptical eye. Kelli Wagner was twenty-seven, died blonde hair and was far too ambitious for her own good. Donna had taken an instant dislike to her...mostly because she knew that Josh would drool over her for the first couple of weeks, not that she cared, but professionally he needed to be able to concentrate.  
The last six interviews had been with women that if Donna didn't know any better she say they came right from his fan club. The Lyman Hoes! Donna groaned inwardly at the very thought of it.  
She glanced at the woman who was still talking animatedly. Donna couldn't bring herself to actually listen. She was a little under qualified and Donna was given this job to find her perfect replacement and Kelli Wagner wasn't her.  
After ten more minutes of the interview Donna finally brought it to and end. Once Kelli had left Josh came bounding into the Muriel Room.  
"How was she?"  
"Not quite right."  
"Donna," he whined.  
"Josh, do you want the job done right or not?"  
"I hired you after speaking to you for like five minutes and you've seen I don't know how many candidates and you still can't find someone?"  
"Josh, there is a process. You finding me was a once in a life time chance," she boasted.  
"'Tis true," he sighed. "Okay, so how many more do you have?"  
"I've got three more today and then I'm supposed to make a decision."  
"Have you seen your new office yet?"  
"Yes, it's an actual office with a door and four walls. It's very impressive."  
Josh leaned against the table next to her. "What are you doing next Saturday?"  
"Not much. My mother is finally going home tomorrow. I've convinced her that I'm able to get around without her help. It's been nice to have her around, but I'm so ready for her to go home."  
"Does she need a ride to the airport?"  
"No, we're good. Thanks, though."  
"So what about Saturday?"  
"What did you have in mind?"  
"I don't know, I thought we could spend some time together. We haven't had a lot of time together since you got back cause I've been working on the thing, and you've been recovering still. I just thought we could do something."  
"Yeah, okay."  
"Donna, your next interview is here."  
"Thanks, Ginger."  
In walked another leggy blonde, with big blue eyes and a large smile.  
"She has potential," Josh muttered as he made a quick exit.  
Donna looked down at the folder she was holding. Grace Morris wouldn't do one bit.  
  
Josh had seen the scowl on Donna's face every time a beautiful woman had walked into the Muriel Room for an interview. He found it amusing. Something told him he was going to end up with a very old assistant. He didn't care, because he only had eyes for one woman any way, but it was still amusing. It meant that Donna wasn't completely immune to him, as he originally had thought.  
Josh couldn't help but egg her on just a little bit. He knew in the end that she would find him the best replacement for an irreplaceable woman. He strutted back to his office where he found C.J. waiting for him.  
"What's up?" Josh asked as he approached.  
"How are the interviews going?"  
"I don't think Donna is pleased with any of the candidates so far."  
"Too young and too pretty are they?"  
Josh smirked. "I'm sure she could come up with some valid answers."  
"I don't doubt it."  
"What do you need, Ms. Cregg?" Josh asked heading into his office.  
"Honestly, I was just passing by saw you heading this way, I thought I'd say hi."  
Josh's forehead creased in confusion. "What's going on, C.J.?"  
C.J. quietly closed the door. "I've been dating Danny for the last few months."  
Josh's eyes widened a little. "Really?"  
"Yeah."  
"No one knows?"  
"I'm not sure anymore. We were seen out at a Starbucks this last weekend by a White House Reporter, by Katie, she didn't seem to suspicious but that doesn't mean that she hasn't put a tail on us so to speak."  
"C.J., you know I don't care if you date Danny. I know that you two will respect each others professional lives, you need to talk to Toby and then you need to talk to Leo and possibly after that, you're going to have to talk to the President."  
"Josh, we're getting married!"  
Josh set down his cup of coffee; happy that he hadn't been drinking when she laid that little piece of news on him. "When? When did this happen?"  
"Last night he proposed, I said yes and now I don't know what to do!"  
Josh sat down in his chair. "Wow! As your friend, Congratulations, as your boss, you need to go talk to Toby."  
"He's going to be mad."  
"I know."  
"You want to come with me?"  
"Not particularly."  
"Hey, I stood behind you and Donna."  
"I'm standing behind you and Danny, just I'll be standing here and you'll be in Toby's office."  
"Bambi ass!" C.J. opened his door to walk out.  
"C.J., no joke, congratulations."  
She smiled, "Thanks."  
  
Grace Morris left the Muriel Room. Donna let out a frustrated sigh. She had been the most annoying and the stupidest person she had interviewed yet. She was surprised to see that Josh wasn't hanging around to ask if she had been the chosen one. Donna through Grace's file on top of the rejected stack and opened the next one.  
A few minutes later Ginger brought in Michael Taft. Donna smiled to herself. He was a good-looking guy, just about to hit thirty. Donna hadn't seen many men in a position like hers, but there were a few.  
"Michael Taft?"  
He nodded and held out his hand.  
"I'm sorry, I would stand but my legs broken."  
"I'm sorry, I hadn't noticed." He reached over and shook her hand.  
"It's fine. My name is Donna Moss and I'm Josh Lyman's current assistant."  
She went through her process, asking the questions, going through the questionnaires they were required to fill out and vetting him as she did the others.  
"Thank you so much, Mike."  
"Thank you, Ms. Moss."  
"Donna, please."  
"I hope your leg gets better soon."  
"Thank you."  
She watched him leave. She closed his file and tossed it in what would be her acceptance pile except that Mike's file was the first one in it.  
"You can't seriously be considering a guy."  
Donna didn't even bother to turn around to face him. "He's very qualified and very nice. He has a good sense of humor. Plus I think it makes more sense for you to have a male assistant. As much as you stay in hotels, I think running around in your boxers in front of Mike is much more appropriate than in front of a woman."  
Josh smirked and approached her. "You never seemed to complain."  
Donna glanced up at him. "Josh, I swear that your fan club got a hold of the information that you were looking for a new assistant. I mean these women were just..." she trailed off.  
"Just what?" He was still smirking. Damn him!  
"They just would not have suited your needs."  
"So you're hiring the guy?"  
"I have two more interviews but he seems like the most promising."  
"I bet."  
  
A week later...  
"Josh Lyman's office."  
"Hi, Mike, it's Donna."  
"Hi, Donna."  
"How's it going?"  
"There's a lot to take in."  
"I promise it'll get easier."  
"Did you want to talk to Josh?"  
"Is he around?"  
"Yeah, hang on."  
"Well, Miss Donnatella Moss, how are you?"  
Donna smiled. "I'm quite well. You Mr. Joshua Lyman."  
"I'm great. What can I do for you this fine Friday afternoon?"  
"Are we still on for Saturday?"  
"Absolutely."  
"Hey, how is Mike working out?"  
Josh chuckled to himself. He knew that Donna would hire Mike and it turned out that he was a quick study and would probably turn out to be very helpful once he got a handle on the ropes, but he still had to tease her. "He's okay, I still think that what's her name would've been better," he whined with a smirk on his face.  
"Josh, you didn't do the interviews, I did and I bet Mike turns out to be valuable."  
"I suppose, but you were invaluable, that's a lot to live up to."  
Donna felt herself smile despite herself. "Go back to work, Joshua."  
"I'll be over early tomorrow."  
"Okay."  
Donna hung up the phone and stared at it for a long moment. She carefully repositioned herself on the couch so she was more comfortable. She looked down at her fingers where she was fidgeting with the ring that Josh had given her. Ever since she had been home, she had it on a silver chain around her neck. She couldn't bear to be without it, but she never once put in on her ring finger. She let out a heavy sigh. She wondered if they would ever find their way back to each other. 


	9. The Ring

"I can't believe it is almost fall again." Josh was staring out of Donna's window in her living room looking down onto the street.  
"How do you think I feel, I've spent the summer in hospitals and a cast?" Donna complained as she took a bite out of the muffin that Josh had brought her for breakfast. "So what did you have in mind for today?"  
"Wait a second, I have to have the plan too? It was my idea for us to spend time together and I even brought breakfast, but now I have to figure out what we're going to do today?"  
"You're the one who said that we hadn't spent any time together and that we should do something, so I thought that meant you had a plan."  
"Donna, how long have you known me?"  
"Roughly seven years."  
"And have I ever had a plan?"  
"Well there was that one time."  
"What one time?"  
"It was secret plan." Donna's lips curved into an evil smile.  
"A secret plan?" Josh looked at her with a clueless expression.  
"Something about your secret plan to fight inflation."  
Josh just glared at her. "Just for that, I say you have to think of the first thing to do."  
"Okay, first I think we should get outside and get some fresh air. Then I think we should go see that movie we've been wanting to see and then I think we should have lunch at that little Mexican place down the street. After that we should come home and relax and talk, followed by dinner with C.J., Danny, Andi, Toby, Charlie and possibly Mallory at Italianos."  
"You had a plan?"  
"Of course I've had a plan, I've known you for like seven years remember?"  
Josh flopped down on the couch next to her. "See this is stuff that Mike doesn't get yet."  
"You like Mike, so stop fighting it. You're just mad because he doesn't look like a Victoria Secret model."  
"Nah. I've got a more specific type."  
"You don't have a type."  
"I do too."  
"Do you want to connect the lines from Joey Lucas to Amy Gardner please?"  
"Not particularly."  
"I didn't think so."  
"Neither one of the are what I consider my type anyway."  
"Really?"  
"Enlighten me, Joshua, what is your type?" Donna felt her stomach flutter in anticipation.  
"Weren't we going to go for a walk or in your case a roll?"  
"Smooth, nice change of subject."  
"I'm a brilliant political mind, Donnatella, you don't want to mess with me."  
"Josh, I mess with you every day."  
"You don't have to remind me." Josh stood up. "Shall we go for that walk?"  
  
A couple of hours later they were sitting in a quaint little Mexican restaurant arguing, laughing and smiling. Donna hadn't felt like this for a long time. She was out with a man that who was attentive, kind, smart, funny and who seemed to completely enjoy her company as much as she enjoyed his. She hadn't felt that since Jack Reece, but even then she felt there was tension between them, maybe because of their jobs and maybe because she talked about Josh a little too much. She couldn't help it sometimes, her job was so much apart of her life and whom was she kidding, she was in love with Josh.  
"What's with the group dinner tonight?"  
"Toby had an idea to take C.J. out to congratulate her and Danny on their engagement, right before they go public and the press ruins everything."  
"Good plan." Josh thought for a moment. "That was Toby's plan."  
"We all think Andi had something to say about it, but yeah."  
"Wow!"  
Donna reached with her fork across the table and stole a bite of his food.  
"Hey!"  
"That's really good."  
"I know that's why I ordered it."  
"It's nice to share, Josh."  
"I was done anyway."  
She quickly stole another bite and smiled. She stifled a yawn.  
"We should probably head back to the apartment. You should probably nap before we go out to dinner."  
"Thank you, Nurse Lyman."  
"Come on, Donna, you're not up to full speed yet and the doctor told you to take it easy."  
"How do you know what the doctor told me?"  
"Because the doctor told me the same thing after I was shot. You know what else, I had this crazed lunatic of an assistant who made me abide by the doctor's rules, in fact she made up her own crazy rules and I'm pretty sure that if it wasn't for her I wouldn't be as well off as I am today."  
Donna stared at him for a long moment. "You're right."  
"I'm sorry?"  
"I'm not saying it again and I wouldn't get used to hearing it either."  
"Are you sure, cause it sounded like I was right?"  
"Let's go, Joshua!"  
  
Josh helped Donna into her bed. He sat down next to her once he pulled the covers around her.  
"What are you going to do?"  
"Actually I was thinking I would take a nap too."  
"Are you feeling okay?"  
"I'm feeling very relaxed which is a new thing for me. I never get enough sleep so getting a little extra probably wouldn't hurt anything."  
"Probably not, but where are you going to sleep?"  
"The couch."  
"That's silly."  
"Really?"  
"I have a queen sized bed, Josh, why don't you just crash over on the other vast side of the bed."  
Josh glanced over her form to the gaping hole on the other side of the bed.  
"Oh sure you're all hesitant about sleeping in the same bed with me when I'm sober and fully clothed..." she trailed off.  
"I guess I'm just a little put off because I don't know where we stand anymore."  
"Join the club, but I promise you that we won't figure it out in the next ten minutes and so we should just shut up and go to sleep so we're both pleasantly rested before dinner tonight."  
Josh scooted off the bed and head to the other side. He stretched out next to her and put his hands behind his head and closed his eyes. Donna fell asleep shortly after he did.  
  
Josh woke up feeling fuzzy and warm. He hadn't woken up like that since long before college. He opened his eyes; it took him a moment to figure out where he was. He heard a soft murmur from his left and glanced over to see Donna's form sleeping soundly. He let out a long, heavy yawn and turned on his side to stare at the woman lying next to him.  
Her silky blonde hair was slightly mussed from sleep; her soft pink lips were parted. He watched her chest rise and fall as she slept soundly. Then something caught his eye.  
Pooled in the center of her collarbone was a chain that he hadn't noticed before and connected to the chain was the ring he had given her before he left Germany. He stared at it for a long time. He finally was able to tear his eyes from her when she started to stir. He quickly turned over and pretended to sleep.  
  
Donna let out a small moan as she stretched her arms above her head. She felt relaxed and sated. She hadn't slept that way in months. She felt the cold metal of the ring against her neck and as she sat up she tucked it under her shirt. She glanced over at Josh who was sleeping soundly. She smiled and lazily she traced a finger over his shoulder to his hand and finally gave up the small connection. He started to stir and she reached for her crutches.  
"Morning, Sunshine," Donna called as she stood up.  
"What time is it?" He stretched his arms. He looked so adorable with his hair sticking up in every direction; his v-neck sweater was all askew and his eyes were still heavy with sleep.  
"It's about five. We've have about an hour to get ready," she said heading into the bathroom.  
  
"Where are Charlie and Mallory?" Donna asked as Josh helped her with the crutches.  
"Charlie had to go with the President to Camp David and Mallory had to cancel, something came up," C.J. replied.  
Donna and Josh both took note that suddenly it looked like they were out on a triple date. C.J. and Danny were cooing and murmuring sweet nothings to each other, while Andi and Toby were arguing over the latest political disaster and Josh and Donna were just sitting there quietly trying to figure out how to act.  
Soon the conversations took over the discomfort between Josh and Donna and everyone was laughing and having a good time.  
"Have you guys set a date yet?"  
C.J. glanced over at Danny, "We're thinking February 12th."  
"Any particular reason?" asked Donna.  
"Honestly, we just put a bunch of names in a hat," Danny replied.  
The table chuckled.  
They ordered dessert and the night became more intimate as C.J. and Danny were feeding each other chocolate cake and Andi and Toby were playfully sword fighting with their forks over their apple crisp.  
"No, see, Donnatella, you ordered the cheese cake while I ordered the turtle cheese cake you can't all of the sudden change your mind like you did with your salmon and my steak."  
"Fish is better for you."  
"I don't care, I ordered the steak and you ordered the salmon there for you have to eat the cheese cake."  
"What does the steak and salmon have to do with the cheese cakes?"  
"You made me eat half of the fish and you ate half of my steak not to mention most of my mashed potatoes. This piece of turtle cheesecake is mine."  
"Joshua, you won't hurt you to share."  
"On the contrary, if I don't eat this entire piece of cheese cake sitting in front of me, I could get violent and it would hurt me to hurt you."  
Donna glared at him. "They're both cheesecake, couldn't we just split them, we'll have a variety that way."  
"This is worse than you not ordering any food at all and then eating all of mine," Josh said putting his arm up as a protective barrier around his cheesecake.  
"You're unbelievable you know that. It's cheesecake."  
"That's right, my cheesecake."  
Donna crossed her arms over her chest and huffed. "Is there a problem, Donna?" Toby asked.  
"No."  
Toby looked over at Josh who was about to eat his first bite of cheesecake. "What did you do?"  
"I refuse to share my cheesecake when she's got her very own dessert in front of her."  
Five minutes later Josh and Donna were sharing his turtle cheesecake.  
  
Over cappuccinos and coffee the six friends chatted, when Donna excused herself Andi and C.J. followed to make sure she would be okay. Once they arrived in the lady's room, the girl talk started.  
"Okay, now let's see the engagement ring," Andi said turning to C.J.  
C.J. held out her hand and the diamond ring glimmered in the florescent light.  
"It's beautiful," Donna gushed. "I can't believe you guys are getting married."  
"What about you and Tobias?" C.J. asked Andi.  
"I don't know. Right now I like the way things are. Ever since Gaza he's been spending more time with the twins and more time with me. I just wonder how long it's going to last."  
"Andi, Toby loves you so much and he loves Huck and Molly too. He just cares so much and he's afraid that he's not good enough for you guys." C.J. leaned against the counter.  
"I know, I know, but I don't feel like I can take a chance of being with him for real and then have him retreat into himself again. I don't think I can take that kind of heartbreak twice in a life time."  
The women nodded in understanding. "What about you and Lyman?" Andi asked.  
Donna blushed. "What about us?"  
"You two act married, shouldn't you just get married?"  
"Andi!"  
"It's true, Donna. You guys have always been that way."  
"We have not."  
"Donna, you were arguing about sharing food, if that isn't a married thing then I don't know what is." Andi smirked.  
"We all see the way you look at him, the way he looks at you. You were so close a few months ago, what happened?" C.J. asked.  
"Honestly, I'm not sure. We had a run in with Amy, I got jealous and angry and the next thing I know I'm telling him it's a bad idea and then Gaza happened and now I'm not working for him any longer. Things just keep changing and I'm not sure..."  
"What's that?" Andi interrupted.  
"What?" Donna looked down at her dress expecting to cheesecake on her dress or something. Andi reached out and that when Donna noticed the ring sticking out of the neck of her dress. "It's nothing." She went to reach for it but Andi tucked it back underneath.  
"That's an engagement ring. In fact that's an antique engagement ring," C.J. sputtered.  
"It's nothing."  
"Donna?" Andi looked at her with questioning eyes.  
"He left it in a letter when he left Germany saying that he loved me but he was going to move on and he didn't want to have this ring anymore burning a hole in his pocket so I should have it and do what I want with it," she fumbled through the words quickly. "Now I don't know what to do, because this ring was supposed to be Joanie's, he said that he was going to move on, I don't know if I can ever move and now all I want is to tell him that I love him and I want him back." Tears started to pour down her cheeks.  
C.J. and Andi wrapped their arms around the young woman trying to sooth her. Finally C.J. said, "You should just tell him how you feel."  
"What if it's too late?"  
"What?"  
"What if he's moved on?"  
"Donna, I promise he hasn't."  
"How would you know?"  
"Because Sam and I have no secrets," C.J. replied with an evil smile.  
"We should get back, otherwise the boys will send a search party," Donna said wiping her tears away.  
  
Josh drove Donna home and walked her up to her apartment and made sure she got in okay. "Thanks for the great day," Donna was leaning on her crutches in the middle of the living room.  
"It was a great day. We should do more, more often now that we're not going to see each other as much with not working together anymore."  
Donna nodded, "That's a good idea."  
"I'll talk to you tomorrow?"  
"Absolutely." He walked over a kissed her lightly on the cheek and left without another word.  
Josh walked out to his car and feeling good about the day. He and Donna had finally made some progress in getting the relationship back to a comfortable and normal pace. Now he just had to figure out a way for her to come to her senses about them and forever.  
  
Donna was getting ready for bed and as she slipped off her dress it only took her moment to realize that it was gone. Donna searched her apartment from the front door to her bedroom hoping that it fell while she was home, but she knew better.

The ring was gone.


	10. The End of the Friendship

"Hi, Josh."  
Josh peered up and standing in the doorway of his office was Andi. "Hi, Congresswoman."  
"Oh, please." She rolled her eyes. "I just dropped by to give you this." She held up a familiar looking chain with an even more familiar looking ring dangling from it. He couldn't find any words let alone any air. "Donna dropped it on her way out of the restaurant the other night, I couldn't catch you guys in time, so I just figured I'd drop it off this morning."  
"Um, thanks, Andi. I'll let her know." Josh had no idea how he was able to speak but he was glad for it.  
"Where do you suppose she got a rock like that?" Andi asked curiously.  
No response.  
"She must be devastated if she thinks she lost it."  
No response.  
"You'll make sure she gets it?" Andi asked.  
He nodded slowly and she disappeared out of his office. He looked down at the ring in his hand. How the hell was he supposed to give her the ring back?  
He closed his door and picked up the phone.  
"Hi, Josh," Sam greeted.  
"Hi, yourself."  
"What can I do for you? You sound agitated."  
"I don't know what to do."  
"What did you do now?"  
"Why does everyone assume that I've done something wrong?" Josh whined.  
"Because you usually do. What's going on?"  
"When I left Germany I gave Donna the engagement ring I had wanted to give her for months and told her that I was going to get over her. Well we all know how well that worked out, so now we're finally getting back on our feet and Saturday we took a nap and when I woke up I saw the ring was on a chain that she wore around her neck. Well that night we went out with C.J., Toby, Andi and Danny and Andi stopped by this morning and brought me the ring saying that Donna dropped it in the restaurant on accident and now I have to figure out how to tell her that the engagement ring I gave her, that she wears around her neck all the time is now back in my possession."  
"You're in quite a predicament."  
"Thanks, Sam," Josh said sarcastically.  
"I don't know what to tell you on this one, except maybe you could just propose to her and put yourselves out of your misery."  
Josh opened his mouth to speak and the closed it again. Finally he said, "I can't do that."  
"Why not? Are you afraid she's going to say no?"  
"Not so much as I'm afraid she's going to say no."  
Josh could hear Sam chuckling on the other end of the phone.  
"This isn't funny, Seaborn."  
"Josh, just go give it to her, tell her the truth. Andi found it. Whatever happens after that happens."  
"Isn't that leaving a little too much to chance?"

"That's all it ever is, Josh."  
  
Donna was sitting at her new desk, in her new office, chatting on her new phone. She scanned her office, she needed to decorate, and she just hadn't found the energy to go shopping. As her eyes traced across the room, they settled on the doorway, where Josh was leaning. He had a big smile on his face, a bouquet of flowers and a present.

"Your assistant told me that I could come on in. I think she's scared of me."

Donna smiled and held up her hand while she quickly ended her phone conversation. "What did you do to her?"

"Nothing, I swear. I just asked if I could see you, she got all flustered and told me to come on in."

"Maybe she was over come by your handsomeness."

"See I was going to say that, but I was afraid I would sound..."

Donna interrupted, "Vain?"

"I come bearing gifts and you're calling me vain?"

"That's right."

"Okay, just so we're clear. This is a nice office."

"Thank you."

"How's it going?"  
  
"It' intimidating, but I like it. I think I'm going to do well."

"That's excellent." Josh approached her desk and handed her the flowers and set the present on her desk. Suddenly he was looking around the room as if he thought someone was watching him and he knocked off her stapler and jumped. "I'm sorry to just drop in on you like this, if you're busy, I can come back," he said nervously.

"Why are you acting weird all of the sudden?" She cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Weird? How am I acting weird?"

"I don't know, one second you're handing me flowers and the next you're saying that you can come back later...what's up?"

"Open your present." Josh began pacing next to her. Donna eyed the rectangle box and then glanced over at Josh who ran his fingers through his already disarrayed hair.

"Josh, what's going on?" She reached out and grabbed his hand so he would stop pacing and face her. She watched him reach into his pocket with his other hand and he pulled out something that fit in the palm of his hand. Donna sat back her in chair and watched as he opened his fingers revealing the chain and the ring that she had lost a couple of days ago. So many emotions were clouding her all at once. She was embarrassed, happy that someone had found it, and horrified that he had found it. She opened her mouth to speak but she couldn't form any words.

Josh started talking instead. "Andi stopped by this morning. She said that you dropped this at the restaurant. She asked me to stop by and give it to you."

Donna just stared at him.

"I wasn't exactly sure how to bring this back to you. I don't know how to take the fact that you're wearing this around your neck. Did Andi know what this was?"

Donna nodded quietly. He let out a heavy sigh. "Team Josh is apparently still active."

"Team Josh?" she asked.

"Long story."

"Anything like Team Toby?"

"Not such a long story."

"What do I do, Donna? I mean if you're going to wear this ring, shouldn't it be...what do I do?"

Donna looked up at him meeting his eyes for the first time. "What do you want to do, Josh?" Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"You know what I want, Donna, you're the one who didn't want this."

Donna felt like she had just been punched in the gut. The air was trapped in her throat; her heart was drumming against her chest. She wanted to scream that she loved him and that she wanted to wear the ring the way it was supposed to be worn, for the reasons it was supposed to be worn. No words came.

"I'm sorry I didn't expect this to be...I have to go." Donna watched him bolt from her office. The ring was slipping from her desk, she held her hand under it and it fell into her palm. She leaned forward resting her head against her desk.

"Ms. Moss?" Donna peered up.

"Morgan, I told you to call me Donna. What's going on?"  
  
"Your eleven o'clock is here."

"Who is my eleven o'clock?"  
  
"Mallory, what the hell are you doing in my office?"

"It's good to see you too, Josh."

Josh closed the door behind him. Usually if Mallory was looking for him, it usually had something to do with Leo and usually not something good. "What do you want, Mal?"

"Grumpy, aren't we?"

"Don't start naming seven dwarves, I'm fine."

"Did you give Donna the engagement ring back?"

Josh just stared at her dumbfounded. "How the hell..."

"I'm Leo McGarry's daughter what did you expect? I know everything there is to know. Not to mention that I've known you the longest besides my father."

"What does any of this have to do with..."

Mallory interrupted, "Josh, you're a good man with a big heart and you annoy the crap out of me the way a big brother is supposed to but you've been in love with Donna forever and she's been in love with you, why on earth would you jeopardize all of that just to save face."

"Mal, you're apparently not up on current events, she didn't want to be together."

"Yes she did."

"Then why did she tell me no?"  
  
"Blockheads!" Mallory grunted.

Josh looked at her for a moment. "Have you been talking to Sam?"  
  
Donna couldn't believe her eyes when she saw Sam Seaborn walk into her office. She grabbed her crutches and got up. Sam rushed to her side and helped her into his arms for a giant hug. "I can't believe you're here!" she squeaked. Emotions were tugging on her and she started to cry.

"Hey," Sam rubbed her back and talked in a soothing voice. "It's okay, what's going on?"

"He brought the ring to me and he's mad at me, and he brought flowers and why didn't I just tell him and I feel like all of this is my fault," she sobbed. Sam helped her back into her chair and he leaned against her desk, not leaving her side.

"Donna, I only got about half of that."

"Remember I told you I lost the ring."

"Yeah."  
  
"Andi found it at the restaurant and gave it to Josh and told him to give it back to me. She knew what the ring was. Then he stopped by here this morning returned it sort of. He asked what he should do. I couldn't tell him what I wanted him to do and he left. He brought me flowers, Sam and a present which I don't have the heart to open."

Sam wiped away some of her tears with his thumb. "You two are a bunch of blockheads. How many more years do the rest of us have to watch this will- they-won't-they production?"

Donna couldn't help but laugh. "Tell me what to do, Sam, and I'll do it."

"Donna, you don't want to take romantic advice from me. I slept with a prostitute on accident, I tried dating Mallory and failed, I tried to tell Ainsely how I felt but before I could get the words out she started dating some other Republican lawyer."

"I'm beginning to think the only people that have are going to walk out of this administrative as a couple are the President and Dr. Bartlett and if we're lucky Danny and C.J."

"You and Josh will get there, you just have to stop being afraid of your feelings."

"Oh, is that all?" she laughed.  
  
The day was over and everyone was meeting at a local bar. Donna arrived a little later than she had anticipated and everyone else was there. "Hi, guys!" she greeted as she hobbled her way over to the large group on her crutches. Josh and Sam immediately got up to help her into a chair. She was tired and didn't feel the need to say she could do it on her own. She was grateful for the help. She felt a zing when Josh's hands snaked around her waist when she wobbled a little, she tried to ignore it and sit down. Donna scanned the table. Everyone was there greeting her. It had been a very long time since all of them had sat down at the same table. Josh sat on one side of her and Sam was on the other, next to him was Mallory then C.J., Danny, Charlie, Toby, and Andi.

"Donna, you're looking good," Charlie complimented.

"Thanks, Charlie." Donna smiled.

"Sam, how are things in California?" Danny asked.

"Sunny." Donna was looking at Sam when she noticed that his hand slowly slipped off the table, then she saw Mallory's shoulder shift slightly and then she looked down into her lap almost like she was blushing. Donna smiled to herself; they were holding hands. She wondered if that was what had brought Sam back to DC. Donna shifted her attention back to the conversation. They were discussing old times. Soon the evening was full of laughter, teasing and people getting up and down to get the next round of drinks.

"The one time I mess up in front of the press and no one forgets it," Josh whined. "It was your fault for baiting me!"

"Josh, you never need baiting to act like that," Donna replied.

The entire table erupted in laughter just as Josh, C.J., Charlie and Toby's pagers went off. Sam looked down at his belt out of habit and kind of felt sad that he was no longer in the loop.

"We gotta go." C.J. stood up and Danny kissed her good-bye. Toby, Charlie and Josh were saying their quick good-byes.

"Can I call you tonight?" Josh whispered to Donna. She nodded and he quickly kissed her on the cheek and ran out the door behind the others. Mallory, Sam, Danny and Donna all sat quietly for a moment.

"Do you miss it, Sam?" Danny asked. "I do. Quite a bit actually, but I like what I'm doing now." "I know exactly how you feel," Donna interjected.  
  
Donna was nearly asleep when the phone rang. She answered the phone keeping her eyes closed. "'lo?"

"I woke you didn't I?"

"S'okay," she murmured.

"I'm sorry about this morning. I shouldn't have run out on you like that," Josh said quietly.

"It's all right, Joshua, I understand."

"You seem to be in this holding pattern that is about to drive me crazy."

"Uh uh," Donna agreed.

"What should we do? I think we should agree to be friends or agree to be more than friends, because this in-between stuff isn't working."

"Let's go out to dinner tomorrow."

"I'm confused." Donna chuckled, "I don't want to be friends, Joshua, let's go out to dinner tomorrow. Let's start at the beginning like we should've a long time ago." Her voice was still heavy with sleep but she was sincere and almost giddy.

"Really?" Josh sounded ecstatic.

"Truly."

"What time should I pick you up?"

"Seven-thirty."  
  
Josh hung up the phone with a huge smile on his face.

Toby wandered into his office. "We're in the middle of a situation and you're smiling like a fool."

"Donna and I are going out on a date. She doesn't want to be friends, we're going on a date."

"About time," he muttered and wandered off again.

"Did I just hear you right? You and Donna are going on a date?" C.J. peered into his office.

"Jesus! Leo's right you need a bell," Josh replied.

"When are you going on your date?" "Tomorrow night barring any national emergencies."

"Just don't screw up, Joshua."

"Yes, ma'am."

C.J. glanced down the hallway. "Hey, Sparky, wait up!" She charged after Toby leaving Josh to revel in his glee.


	11. Chocolate Chocolate Cake

Donna stared at her reflection in the long mirror in front of her. She was wearing a white dress shirt that had renaissance sleeves and a pair of black dress pants. Her hair was down and curled in loose locks. She applied a little make-up but she was so nervous her cheeks were flushed pink. She turned around and saw the heap of clothes on her bed; she turned around and looked in the mirror one more time. This was by far the best outfit she had tried on in the last hour.  
That's when she heard her buzzer. Her stomach twisted and fluttered as she quickly slipped on her black heels on and trotted out into the living room, she took a deep breath and opened the door.  
She was greeted with a large bouquet of a fall arrangement of flowers and Josh who was smiling like an idiot. Donna smiled back.  
"Hi," was all she could manage to say.  
"Hi," he replied.  
"Would you like to come in?"  
"Yeah."  
She opened the door wide and he walked in and handed her the flowers as she shut the door. "They're beautiful." She inhaled their sweet perfume. "I'm going to put them in water before we go."  
He followed her to the kitchen. Then she saw his eyes widen. "Your cast is off!"  
She danced in a little circle to show off her freedom from the cast. Her leg was weak and it looked pale and scarred but soon it would be normal again. She felt his gaze on her as she started fumbling around in cupboards for a vase. She was reaching to get a one when he spoke, "You look beautiful, Donnatella." She fumbled with the glass cylinder and she closed her eyes expecting to her glass shattering below her. A moment later when she opened her eyes she realized that she was leaning back against a hard, warm body behind her. His arms were raised above her head; he gently set the vase that he caught on the counter.  
"You okay?"  
"Fine," her voice cracked.  
He took a step back and watched her fill the vase and arrange the flowers. She set the flowers on the kitchen table where the last of the sunlight was peering in.  
"Let me just get my purse and I'll be ready to go." She sauntered out into the living room, him on her heels. She grabbed her purse and turned around to him. "Ready?"  
He nodded and as they walked out of the apartment building to his car, she felt his hand resting on the small of her back. He opened the car door for her and waited for her to get in and he closed it behind her. Once they were on their way to dinner Donna glanced over at him. They hadn't said a word since they left the apartment.  
"Joshua?"  
"Hm?"  
"Why are you being so quiet?"  
"Quiet?"  
"Josh, I can usually never get you to shut up and now that you are it's very disconcerting."  
He smiled. "What would you like to talk about, Donnatella?"  
She groaned, "Anything."  
He chuckled, "You sound nervous over there, are you okay?"  
"I'm fine, I'm just...you're so calm. You're being a gentleman, what is with you?" she squeaked.  
"I don't know actually. I just have this overwhelming sense of calm. It's very unnerving actually."  
"Did you drink?"  
"Donna!"  
"You have a very sensitive system and if you had..."  
"Donna, I have not had any drinks for a very long time. I'm not drunk or under the influence of anything...except maybe you. You're pretty intoxicating." His gaze darkened as he looked over at her.  
Donna felt her entire body heat instantly. His gaze traced over her body and she suddenly felt ravished and they hadn't even had dinner yet.  
Once they arrived at the restaurant Donna felt calmer. They were seated in a cozy corner near the back. There was light classical music floating through the air and the candlelight set a more intimate mood. They kept sneaking glances at each other as they looked over their menus and ordered.  
They eased into conversation, twirling from one topic to another. Donna loved that she had his full attention. The three attractive women that had walked by hadn't distracted him, he hadn't mentioned work and he seemed to be completely focused on her. She missed being near him, talking with him and spending late nights with him just listening to him talk. She didn't realize until tonight that she wanted to see him every morning when she woke up and every night before she went to bed. She wanted to hear his voice just as she was about to sleep, to feel his heart beat in her ear and she wanted to feel his touch more than just on the small of her back.  
Josh had this urge to tuck her blonde hair behind one of her ears, just to feel the texture. He loved to listen to her laugh or talk about something she was very passionate about. He would never fully admit it, but he missed walking the halls of the White House with her bantering on about one thing or another. He loved her stupid trivia and her inane knowledge for inane things. He loved this woman and until tonight, until he was allowed to love her openly, he hadn't realized how much he loved her.  
The waiter brought their dessert they decided they wanted to share. Josh watched as she put the first fork full of chocolate, chocolate cake up to her mouth. She parted her lips and her pink tongue caressed the bottom of the fork. She slowly pulled the fork out of her mouth making a small moaning noise in pleasure.  
"This is delightfully sinful," she murmured.  
Josh was trying to remember how to breathe. He was sitting in the middle of a restaurant, he was the Deputy Chief of Staff and all he wanted to do was grab Donna, throw her on the table and make love to her. He had never been turned on so quickly in his life.  
Josh tried to take a bite of the cake to try and put his mind some where else otherwise he wasn't going to be able to walk out of the restaurant.  
"Don't you like it?" she asked innocently.  
"It's...um...great." He managed a halfhearted smile and put a second bite into his mouth. He forgot to chew when she licked the sticky chocolate goop from her fingertip.  
"Josh, why are you looking at me like that?"  
His eyes widened, "Like what?"  
"What's with you all of the sudden?" She held another bite just inches from her mouth. Josh was pretty sure he couldn't take this much longer.  
"Why don't we get a piece to go and we can go back to my apartment and watch a movie or something?" he suggested lightly.  
"You're not enjoying the atmosphere? The dessert? The company?" He saw the faint humor in her eyes that she was trying to hide. Suddenly he wondered if she was torturing him on purpose.  
"The atmosphere is great, the dessert tasty and the company is well the best ever, but I just think that we should move this to a more comfortable and cozy place. We can have some coffee, watch a movie, talk...anything is acceptable really."  
"Except that you don't want to stay here and finish the dessert?"  
This time a small smile curled over her lips and that suddenly turned him on. This wasn't good. "Donna," he whined.  
"What, Josh?"  
"You know damn well, what!"  
"Is something bothering you?" she asked as she casually dipped her finger in the chocolate sauce that was pooled on her plate and licked it off.  
Josh leaned over the table and whispered through his teeth so he was sure that no one would over hear him. "Keep doing that and your going to find I like the dessert a lot more as I'm licking it off your body in the middle of the restaurant."  
Donna and Josh were both surprised by the words that came out of his mouth, but it didn't feel awkward or weird, it felt right and hot.  
Donna found that she was suddenly uncomfortable now too, she squirmed in her chair feeling hot and bothered. She set the fork down on her plate and grabbed the waiter just as he happened by. "Check please."  
  
Josh drove back to his place calmly. He was thinking through what was happening. He hadn't intended to take her back and ravish her until she screamed his name...no matter how enticing it sounded at that particular moment. He wanted to take things slow with her and right. He wanted everything to go smoothly.  
Donna was smiling as she stared out the window. The evening had been perfect. He had been a gentleman and flirtatious. They had wonderful conversations and playful banter over dinner and then dessert came and she saw his reaction, the heat burning in his eyes each time she took a bite. She had to admit it was fun torturing him, but he had turned the tables on her and now she was so aroused she could barely sit still.  
They had some idle chat until he parked his car outside of his apartment. They walked up to his third story apartment. He held open the door for her as she entered the threshold. She sauntered over to the couch and flopped down.  
"Coffee?" he asked.  
"You're going to bring me coffee?"  
"Well we both know you're not going to do it." He smirked as he headed for the kitchen.  
"I'm not your assistant anymore, I'll bring you coffee next time."  
"This is the first time I'm actually happy that you're not working for me anymore. If I would've known you'd bring me coffee, I'd have fired you years ago."  
Donna just rolled her eyes. She glanced down at the bag of dessert she set on the table in front of her. She grabbed it and stood up and headed to the kitchen. She brushed passed him and slid it into his barren refrigerator. When she stepped back she felt Josh's arms snake around her waist and pull him flush against him. She let out a small grunt of pleasure as he pulled back her hair and lightly grazed his lips against her neck. She tilted her head to give him better access. She slid her hands down his sides and leaned back into him.  
Her lips parted and his name escaped from her throat. She tried to turn around in his arms, but he held her tightly against him. She felt his erection against her bottom and gently shifted her hips causing friction. She heard him hiss. He lightly nipped at her shoulder.  
"You feisty little pixy," he growled as his fingers slipped underneath the fabric of her shirt.  
"You're torturing me," she growled.  
"Turnabout is fair play, Donnatella," he whispered. His fingers traced circles over her flat stomach slowly and she couldn't help but press into him again.  
"Turnabout for what?" she questioned innocently.  
Josh grunted, turned her around in his arms quickly then without a word he propped her up onto the counter. He stood between her legs, his hands running up and down her thighs. She rested her hands on his shoulders and then caressed down the length of his chest and back up.  
"I didn't bring you here to do this, I just couldn't resist a little payback." He said meeting her eager blue eyes.  
"So we're not going to do this?" She leaned forward and started leaving barely-there kisses on his neck, jaw and cheeks.  
"I didn't say that, I just said that I didn't bring you here specifically for this," he mumbled, his hands slithered up her hips, torso and across the sides of her breasts.  
"Okay. Do you want to do this?"  
"Want is not part of the equation."  
"What is?"  
"This was our first date. In the past we've never made it past our first date. I just didn't know if maybe we should move things slowly."  
She kneaded the muscles in his back as she murmured, "How slowly?"  
"What do you think?" He was lightly stroking her inner thigh near her center.  
"I think that we've waited long enough." Donna pulled back and looked at him for a brief moment before her mouth descended over hers.  
Suddenly everything became frenzied. Josh was unbuttoning her shirt without trying to rip it, even though he could care less and Donna was fumbling with his belt. Josh finally managed to undo the last button; he parted the fabric and slid it off her shoulders. Their mouths were still sealed together as Josh reached behind her to unfasten her bra. Donna cried against his mouth as his hands cupped her breasts, caressing them, kneading them and pinching her nipples to pert points. He tore his mouth from hers and started to suckle on her breasts.  
Donna could no longer concentrate on the belt; instead she raked her fingers through his hair and moaned his name leaning her head back against his cabinets.  
"God, you're beautiful," he murmured against her flesh.  
Donna arched her back and filled his hands and mouth more of her. She inched her hips forward causing some friction, she let out a small moan. Slowly Josh kissed his way back up to her mouth. She scooted off the counter and finally released the belt. She quickly undid his button and zipper and started to pull them down his legs. She knelt down in front of him; she slid his boxers down his legs and discarded them with the rest of their clothing. Josh shucked off his shirt and then watched with anticipation as Donna licked the head of his erection. She ran her hand down the length of him in a slow, torturous rhythm. Josh groaned, his knees started to shake. Donna pulled back and released him.  
She gently pulled his arms so he kneeled down in front of her. They were eye to eye again. He glanced over her. "You're wearing too many clothes."  
"I am?" She smirked.  
"I would take you to the bedroom," he said as he unzipped her pants and started to slide them down.  
She interrupted, "I can't wait that long."  
Josh disposed of her pants and underwear. She laid down on the hard, cold linoleum and pulled him down onto her. Their lips met in another searing kiss.  
"Protection?" Josh muttered against her mouth.  
"Pill," she gasped as he slid a finger into her without warning.  
Josh rolled off of her a little bit and looked down the length of her body. His eyes caressed every curve. He ran his free hand down the leg that had just had the cast removed. There were scars were the bones had penetrated her leg. He carefully touched her wounded leg with his fingertips as he continued to stroke inside of her. Her breath was coming out in jagged pants and small cries were escaping from her lips. His eyes returned to her face and he felt her hand caress the scar he barely noticed anymore.  
It was then that they both realized they had nearly lost each other too many times. Donna let out a frustrated cry when he slipped his fingers out of her. Josh lowered himself over and slowly filled her again. They both let out a loud moan.  
As frenzied as everything had started, their rhythm was slow and sensual. Josh's torso was pressed against hers, their legs intertwined, and their eyes never wavering from each other. Soon the primal act took over their bodies and they needed more. They were both thrusting into her each other and just as they both released they swallowed their screams in a passionate kiss.  
They laid their for a long time entangled in each other's arms. Both of them were shaking with emotion.  
"I love you." Neither one of them knew which one said it first but it didn't matter.  
Josh leaned in and kissed her gently.  
Finally Donna said, "This is real romantic but my ass is sticking to the linoleum, do you think we could move at least onto the carpet?"  
Josh chuckled. They stood up and started kissing again. They headed into the living room with full intentions to make it to the bedroom. Josh's hands were roaming all over her body and Donna was stroking his already hardening erection.  
They made it to the side of the couch. At least there was carpet.  
  
Hours into the night after three pit stops they finally made it to the bedroom. They were lying just feet away from the bed. "I didn't realize you'd have the stamina for up against the wall," Donna cooed softly into his ear.  
"With you it seems I can do just about everything," he replied kissing her forehead.  
"Except make it to the bed," she giggled.  
"We'll get there, I promise. I'd take you there now but I'm not sure my legs work quite yet. Where did you learn to do that thing?"  
She smirked blushing slightly. "I heard about it and it seemed like the thing to do at the time."  
"I had no idea that you would be that limber."  
"Yoga is a girl's best friend. Maybe you should learn," she suggested.  
"When would I learn to do yoga in between staff meetings and meetings on the Hill?"  
"Good point. Maybe once you're out of office."  
"Deal."  
"Hey, Joshua, do you think we could make it to the shower? There is still chocolate cake on my chest and stomach."  
Josh looked over at the doorway behind them and then over at the bed. "It is closer than the bed. I like our chances."  
Donna giggled and kissed him hard on the mouth. "Race ya!" 


	12. For or Against

"Is it true?" Sam asked Mallory as they were strolling through the park. The leaves were changing and winter was on its way.  
"I don't know, I can't get a straight answer out of Josh and no one seems to have the facts."  
"They went out on a date, we know that much."  
"Sam, that was a month in a half ago."  
"Donna won't give me a straight answer either. In fact she doesn't give me any kind of answer. Do you think they're married?"  
Mallory laughed, "No!"  
"Do you think that the first date went really bad and now neither of them want to talk about it?"  
"I don't know. Josh does seem to get into a mood when ever I pester him about it."  
"Hm?"  
"Hm, what?" Malloy pulled Sam closer by putting her arm around his waist bring his hip into contact with hers.  
"I don't know. You'd think if they did get together they'd tell the world about it."  
"We're not exactly screaming it from the rooftops!"  
"Okay, but I fly out here almost every weekend, that might be a clue."  
"You could move back here," she suggested lightly.  
Sam stopped and looked over at Mallory who looked a little surprised at her statement as well. "Really?"  
"Or I could move out there," she stated lightly.  
"Really?" he asked again.  
"I hate that I can't see you when ever I want. Plus you should see my long distance bill and the minutes on my cell phone I use up in like a week."  
Sam smiled and kissed her. "We'll work something out."  
  
"Danny, I'm not having carrot cake for my wedding."  
"Your wedding? I thought it was our wedding?"  
"That's more of an honorary thing."  
"You guys like doing that."  
C.J. looked over at Danny from her wedding planner. "Women?"  
"No, your administration."  
C.J. smirked, "Only to a couple of people. Sam mostly, but he isn't there anymore."  
"So basically for the wedding I just have to be there."  
"Basically. Let me tell you if you mess that up...the wedding night isn't going to be fun for you."  
"The wedding night wouldn't be fun for you either."  
"Oh, I'd have fun," C.J. said playfully.  
"You're evil."  
"That's right."  
C.J. flipped through her planner as Danny spoke, "Any news on Josh and Donna?"  
"Why does Josh's name always get spoken first? Why isn't it Donna and Josh?"  
"Is this about changing your last name to Concannon?"  
"Claudia Jean Concannon? Plus I'm on television it will get confusing."  
"You could hyphen like Courtney Cox Arquette," he suggested.  
"Danny, would you change your name?"  
Danny looked at her for a moment. "Yes."  
"You would change your name to Danny Cregg?"  
"Yes, only I'd hyphen Concannon and Cregg."  
"Fine, then I'll do it if you do it."  
"Any news on Josh and Donna?"  
"I don't know are we on the record?"  
"No."  
"Then, no I haven't. They're not saying much about anything these days. I do notice that Josh often gets out of the office early when ever he can, but that could be to drink himself into a stupor every night for all we know."  
"Good point. On the record?"  
"The White House doesn't comment on personal relationships."  
Danny smiled and pulled C.J. into his lap and kissed her. "You think Danny Concannon-Cregg works for me?"  
"It could." She smiled.  
"I don't care what your name is, C.J., as long as you're in my arms."  
  
"Charlie!" the President yelled from the Oval Office.  
"Yes, sir?"  
"How did Norte Dame do last night?"  
"It was a massacre, sir."  
"We've talked about this, Charlie. You just say they lost."  
"It was pretty bad, sir."  
"Okay."  
Charlie nodded and was about to leave when the President called him back, "Oh and Charlie have we heard anything about Josh and Donna?"  
"Sir?"  
"They had a date a month or so ago, are they still dating?"  
"I don't know, sir."  
"Haven't heard anything?"  
"I've heard many things. Mostly speculation."  
"What do you think is going on between the two of them?"  
"Josh isn't talking, sir."  
"Okay, but what do you think is going on between them?"  
"It's hard to say. He seems like the same Josh to me, I would think that if he and Donna were together that he would be strutting around here more than he already does."  
"You don't think Josh could keep a secret if he wanted to."  
"I'm sure he can, but I think this one would be pretty hard for him to keep."  
"Sam thinks they're married?"  
"Yes, Mr. President."  
"Is there a pool?"  
"I'm sorry, sir?"  
"Don't play dumb with me, Charlie. There's a pool isn't there?"  
"Yes, sir."  
"Well?"  
"Fifty bucks, for or against."  
"I'm for! I bet they're together."  
"Yes, sir. I'll tell Toby."  
"What does Toby think?"  
"Toby says he doesn't care."  
"Where's his money sitting?"  
Charlie smiled. "For."  
The President grinned. "That's all, Charlie."  
"Thank you, sir."  
  
"Well I gave him the ring like a month ago to give back to her and if no one has seen a ring on her finger then maybe they're not together," Andi was sitting on Toby's table with her legs crossed.  
Toby was leaning back his chair throwing his ball against the wall. "Most people expect Josh to be strutting around and cocky if he is with Donna, but I tend to disagree. See Donna is different from the Joey Lucas's and the Amy Gardners of Josh's life. I think that if he and Donna are together they're keeping it themselves so they can enjoy it before friends, family and the media can stick their noses in it."  
"Toby that's you, not Josh," she argued.  
"I'm only going to say this once and I will never admit it in public, but Josh and I are a lot more alike then anyone realizes."  
Andi smirked, "That's a scary thought."  
"Tell me about it."  
"So when are they going to tell the world that they're together?"  
"How should I know?"  
"You know that they're together!"  
"I don't not, Andrea, I guess that they're together."  
"You sounded pretty positive."  
"Is there anyway out of this conversation?"  
"You coming over tonight?"  
"I was planning on it."  
"You want to stay after we put the kids to sleep. We could talk for a while."  
"About what?"  
"Nothing, just talk."  
Toby smiled, "Yeah, okay."  
  
"I've heard they've been spotted at a couple of restaurants and near a Tiffany's," Margaret spoke quietly to the other assistants surrounding the coffee stand.  
Ginger scoffed, "That doesn't mean anything."  
"They're friends, we all know that and now that they don't work together they're probably just spending time together," Bonnie continued.  
"Don't you think if there was something going on one of them would've let it slip by now?" Carol asked.  
"Wouldn't we see a difference in the way they act?" Kathy suggested.  
"I don't know, I kind of figured it Josh and Donna ever got together they would still be Josh and Donna," Nancy inputted.  
"I think they're acting far to calm for nothing to be up," Debbie said casually.  
"We all know Josh Lyman's I-just-got-laid swagger and I haven't seen it," Ginger said.  
Carol replied, "Yeah but this is Donna not some skank like Amy."  
Charlie interrupted, "Okay, Ladies, enough chit chat are you in or are you out?"  
  
"Agent Casper is here to see you," Margaret entered Leo's office.  
"Yeah, send him in please."  
A few moments later Agent Casper came through the door his arms behind his back. He stood stiffly in front of the Chief of Staff's office. "Hey, Mike, how's it going?"  
"Good, sir."  
"Call me Leo."  
"Yes, sir."  
"What have you found out?"  
"Our intelligence hasn't been able to find much. We know that after Gaza there has been a lot of tension."  
"I could've gotten that from my own intelligence, Mike, but Margaret has actual sightings. Can you confirm that Josh and Donna are dating?"  
"No, sir."  
"Mike, I've got fifty bucks riding on this."  
"I'm sorry, sir, but there just isn't much to go on."  
"You're the FBI, Casper!"  
"Yes, sir. Have you thought about just asking, sir?"  
Leo glared at the younger man. "Did you ask?"  
"Yes, but he didn't answer. But you're his boss you could order him. Have the President order him, sir."  
"Do you have money on his, Mike?"  
"Yes, sir."  
"Are you for or against?"  
"I'm against, but mostly it's just wishful thinking. I wish I would've asked Donna out years ago."  
Leo chuckled. "You're excused, Agent Casper."  
"Thank you, sir."  
  
"This is a brilliant plan. They won't suspect a thing."  
"Jed, you really are incorrigible. Why doesn't everyone just let the poor couple be?"  
"Do you know something, Abbey?"  
The First Lady looked over at the President. "No, but if I did I wouldn't tell."  
"That's because you've got fifty bucks in the pot too. I balance the check book to relax remember?"  
"Yes, Jed, but you still don't know which way I went."  
"That's an excellent point, but let's just hope one of us is right or we loose an hundred bucks," replied Bartlett as he tugged his sweatshirt over his head.  
"Mom?" Zoey's voice echoed through the residence.  
"We're here!" Abbey called back.  
Zoey entered the bedroom a few minutes later. "You do know that guests are arriving any minute?" she asked looking at her mother standing in a robe.  
"I know, dear, I was just about to go change. Keep your father busy so he doesn't go into the kitchen and bother the chef."  
Zoey kissed her mother on the cheek. "Okay." She kissed her father. "Hi, Dad."  
"How's school, sweetheart?"  
"I graduated."  
"That's right, so what are you doing now?"  
"I'm working at a business in New Hampshire, Dad. You know that?"  
"I know."  
"Is Charlie coming tonight?"  
"I believe so, yes. He was invited anyway."  
"How much money do you and Mom have riding on this little farce?"  
"Farce? This is a dinner to enjoy the company of all of our friends."  
"This is a dinner to find out if Donna and Josh finally got together or not."  
"We see you once a month now, how do you possibly know what's going on around here?"  
"I have my ways." Zoey glanced at her watch. "We should get down stairs, people should be here soon."  
  
Nearly a half and hour later almost everyone was there. They were milling around the common area chatting animatedly and laughing. When Josh walked into the room there was deadening silence that filled the room. Josh cautiously crept into the room looking behind him to make sure that it was him that everyone was staring at. He walked up to Sam who was the closest.  
"Why is everyone staring at me?"  
"It's a thing we do every time some one walks in," he replied. "Did you come alone?"  
"I came from the office, was I supposed to pick someone up between my office and the residence?"  
Sam looked slightly disappointed but replied, "No."  
The room filled with noise once again. About three minutes later Donna came into the room and the room filled with silence once again. She quietly and quickly milled over to the group of assistants near her.  
"What's going on?"  
"Nothing, it's a thing we do when someone new walks into the room," Margaret replied.  
"Oh. Why?"  
Ginger shrugged her shoulders. "We're not sure."  
The evening continued and just before dinner was served Donna and Josh had ended up in the middle of the room from mingling from one group to another.  
"Hi," Donna smiled casually.  
"Hello." He stuffed his hands into his pants pockets as they started their conversation.  
Slowly each conversation died and everyone was watching them carefully for any sign that would give them away one way or another.  
Josh stopped in mid-sentence when he realized that he was the only one in the room talking. They looked around the room and noticed everyone was staring at them.  
"Okay what is going on?" Josh yelled.  
Everyone stared at the ground as if they were ashamed.  
"Are you married?" Sam squeaked.  
Donna turned and looked at him. "Is who married?"  
"You and Josh," Mallory responded.  
"That's what all of this is about?" Josh asked.  
"Not so much about the married part," C.J. said.  
"We just want to know if you guys finally got together," Danny finished.  
"No one can seem to get a straight answer." Margaret stated.  
"You all act like there is money riding on this," Josh interjected.  
Everyone's eyes drifted to the floor again.  
Donna scolded, "You all should be ashamed of yourselves."  
"How much?"  
"Fifty dollar," Charlie replied.  
"What's the bet?" Donna asked.  
"Whether you're together or not." Toby was leaning against the wall looking slightly guilty but mostly amused.  
Donna looked over at the President. "Are you in on this too, sir?"  
"I'm for if that's any consolation."  
"You had to have a fake dinner to find out if we were together or not?" Josh seemed completely flabbergasted.  
"What did you think we would come in holding hands and whispering sweet nothings into each other's ear?" Donna smirked.  
"Oh, come on, you guys are the hottest will-they-won't-they couple since Ross and Rachel," Zoey chimed in  
"Can we move this along, I'm hungry!" Toby shouted.  
"Well, are you going to tell us?" Leo asked.  
"We're going to talk in the hallway, we'll be right back." Josh and Donna moved casually out into the hallway without looking at each other or touching each other. They closed the door and everyone waited for them to return.  
  
"I knew it! Everyone was acting far too fishy!" Donna whispered.  
Josh reached out and grabbed Donna around the waist and pulled her to him. "It's been like forty-five minutes and I missed you way too much. That little time in my office wasn't enough. We should've just not shown up." Josh started kissing down her neck.  
Donna started to giggle as he tickled her a little. "I can't believe they bet money on us. You'd think these people would be too busy to worry about whether we're together or not."  
"Should we tell them?"  
"I don't know, I kind of want to torture them now."  
"Are we ready to tell the world that we're a couple?" Donna's fingers were lightly brushing up and down against the back of his neck. "I don't know if we can keep finding reasons to come out here and make out like teenagers." She kissed his neck and his jaw lightly.  
Josh growled and pulled her tightly against him and assaulted her mouth with his. A few moments later Josh froze. Donna pulled away and looked at him. "What?"  
"I don't think it matters anymore." Donna followed his gaze to the doorway they had exited. Sam and Toby were standing on either side of the doors holding them open while all the guests gaped at them.  
There was a loud thunder of applause and cheers and a few growls of those who had lost their money.  
Josh cleared his throat still holding Donna to him, "Ladies and Gentlemen, we have an announcement." 


	13. Come Back to Me

Josh entered Donna's apartment cautiously. The living room was dark but there was a faint light streaming in from Donna's bedroom. There was a thick haze of distress in the air, Josh wasn't sure what he was going to find, but every bone in his body told him that he needed to find Donna. He stepped toward the bedroom. He breeched the entrance and felt his stomach twist in anguish.  
The room had been turned upside down. He had been to her apartment frequently over the last couple of weeks since they had gotten together. She was a tidy person. Seeing broken glass and picture frames on the floor was unsettling. The drapes were all closed and clothes were strung everywhere. He headed for the bathroom fearing the worst had happened.  
He stepped into the entryway of the bathroom. He stood there frozen for a moment and just stared. Then he felt his body spring into action; he knelt down next to the bathtub and flipped open his cell phone and dialed 911.  
"I have an emergency!"  
  
**One week before.**

"Die Hard is your idea of a romantic movie?" Donna looked at him with a disapproving look.  
"It's very romantic."  
"Which part is romantic, him cutting his feet on lots of glass or beating the hell out of the big German guy?"  
"Hey! He did it all in the name of love! His wife was in that building."  
"Joshua, you're the one who wanted to do the romantic evening with a romantic movie and then a romantic dinner and then a romantic bath!"  
"That's right. We'll have all of that."  
"Is watching Die Hard part of all that?"  
"Yes."  
"Your romantic plan is flawed."  
"You're just jealous because you didn't think of it first."  
"Just start the movie." Donna curled up against Josh. He put his arm around her and she felt safe and comforted.  
Josh peered up at Josh as the credits started rolling. He was fast asleep. She quietly shut off the television and shook him gently. "Let's go to bed, Josh."  
He opened his eyes and allowed her to help him off the couch. They headed into the bedroom. She tucked him in on his side and then she tucked herself in. He turned on his side and draped his arm over her waist. She felt weird. There was something twisting inside her. She felt wide-awake now and sort of angry. She flipped around in the bed causing Josh to withdraw from her. Finally after a long struggle she fell asleep.  
  
Josh remembered what it was like for him after he was shot. He had nightmare after nightmare when he fell asleep at night. The only thing he ever felt comforting is when Donna would sneak into his room and sit by his side all night. He remembered her cool touch as she lazily stroked his hair and his shoulders. He remembered he felt every ounce of the pain he felt when he was shot. The nightmares had finally desisted after he met with Stanley. Not that they were completely gone, he had a couple of nightmares here and there. The night the pressroom had been shot at he had had a nightmare. He ended up calling Stanley like Donna had suggested. Then there was the first night in the German hospital before Donna had woken up the first time. Instead of him being shot, he watched her get shot. Never in his life did he remember feeling so awful until he stood outside of the operating room when she had the pulmonary embolism.  
When Donna started screaming Josh felt his entire body jolt with adrenaline, she sounded just like she had in his dream when she was shot and there was nothing he could do to help.  
Josh sat up and at first there was no sign of Donna, then he heard her gasps coming from the other side of the bed. He leaned over and found her breathless and sprawled out across the floor.  
"Donna?"  
She looked up at him, her eyes wild with emotion. She didn't respond to him. Josh crawled out of bed and knelt down next to her. She was shaking and crying now. He pulled her into his arms. She sobbed into his shoulder.  
He finally got her back into bed and she fell asleep cradled in his arms.  
  
The next morning Donna woke up early. She climbed out of Josh's arms and went into the bathroom. She looked at her reflection in the mirror she didn't recognize the person staring back. She had barely slept a wink last night. She hadn't wanted to go back to where her dreams seemed to take her. She remembered the sounds of the metal exploding, crushing and screeching all around her. There had been a sharp pain in her leg and then her entire body seemed to ache, then there was darkness.  
She remembered sitting for hours upon hours with Josh when he had started having nightmares. She had never been more scared watching him cry out in fear and pain. The first couple of nightmares Donna didn't sleep a wink those nights. She knew how it must've looked to him last night, but she was fine.  
  
"You're up early," Josh said sleepily.  
"I need to get some stuff done in the office," she mumbled pulling up her socks.  
Josh sat up and rubbed his eyes. "Donna, it's Sunday, we had a day planned."  
"I know, but I completely forgot, and it's really important."  
Josh nodded his head. "Okay. What time do you think you'll be done?"  
"I'm not sure." She smoothed her shirt and slid on her tennis shoes. "I'll call you later."  
Josh watched her walk out of the bedroom; a moment later he heard the front door close. "Good-bye," he muttered.  
Josh waited until eight o'clock before he called Sam. "Hey, Josh!"  
"Hi."  
"What's wrong?"  
"Nothing, I just...have you talked to Donna recently?"  
"Yesterday, why?"  
"Did she seem different to you?"  
"Different how?"  
"I don't know. Last night she had a nightmare and then this morning she left at like five o'clock in the morning to go to work and she didn't even say good-bye. I would like to think that I did something wrong, but I didn't. We watched a movie together last night, and I fell asleep, she woke me up to bring me to bed and then...that's it. I didn't do anything wrong."  
"Are you sure? Because it sounds like you did."  
"What?"  
"What movie did you watch?"  
"Die Hard."  
"With Bruce Willis?"  
"Is there another one?"  
"Josh!" Sam scolded.  
"What?" he squeaked.  
"Nothing, I'm sure that she gave you plenty of crap for that one. It doesn't sound like you did anything."  
"Even if I did it's not like her just to leave like that. She didn't kiss me; she barely acknowledged my presence. She just put on her shoes, told me she would call me later and left.  
"I don't know, Josh."  
He let out a long sigh. "You know what, I'm probably being paranoid. I was half asleep when she left, maybe she did say good-bye, I'm sure I'll hear from her later and everything will be fine."  
"I'm sure you're right, buddy."  
  
**Two days later.**  
  
"I don't care!" Donna yelled at the top of her lungs. "Like it matters to me!" She slammed the phone down so hard that she slipped and nailed her hand down onto of the cradle for the phone. She cried out in pain.  
Josh hesitated before he said anything. "Donna?" His voice was barely above a whisper.  
She snapped her head up to find him staring at her with concern. "When did you get here?"  
"Just in time to witness your performance there."  
"I was dealing with some idiot from the majority whip," she growled.  
"Donna, are you okay?"  
"I'm fine," she snapped.  
Josh didn't respond. "I came by to see if you wanted lunch."  
"I can't. I have a thing."  
"You've just been getting busier and busier lately haven't you? This is like the third lunch date you've broken."  
"I'm sorry, Josh, but I can't always drop everything I'm doing to attend to your ego!"  
"Hey!" Josh was taken aback. "I just wanted to spend some time with you."  
"I'm sorry, Josh, my job here is important and I thought you of all people who have broke more dates for your job would totally understand that."  
"I get it, Donna, you don't have to be such a..."  
"I thought you liked bitches, Josh, lord knows you attract enough of them."  
It was then that Josh knew that he was no longer dealing with "his Donna" she had been replaced with something angry and practically violent.  
"I'm just going to go, I obviously did something to piss you off."  
"All you had to do was be you!"  
Josh stormed out without another word. Donna just stared after him for a moment. "They always leave," she muttered before slamming her office door shut.  
  
C.J. busted into Josh's office without even knocking. "Josh!"  
He stood up looking alarmed. "What's wrong?"  
"You're right something's wrong!"  
"What are you..."  
C.J. interrupted, "She was fired from work today!"  
"What?" He felt his entire body shake. "What the hell happened?"  
"She took a swing at someone, she was fired on the spot. That's not the worst of it."  
"What is?"  
"The press has a hold of the story. In fact that's how I found out about it."  
Josh covered his face with his hands. "What happened to her, C.J.?"  
"You haven't talked to her?"  
"Three days ago. She won't return my calls. No one can seem to get a hold of her."  
C.J. looked at her friend. "I don't know what to do. I'll say no comment for right now, but that's going to hold forever."  
"Thanks, C.J. I'll see what I can do."  
Josh sat and stared at his desk for a long time. His thoughts drifting over and over what had been going on for the last week. It was then when it occurred to him.  
He quickly started paging through his phone book on his cell phone he punched the number in. "Hi, it's me, how soon can you be in D.C.?"  
  
Donna ignored the mirror. She hadn't been able to look at herself for a long time now. She didn't even know who she was anymore. She started the bathtub. She needed to relax. She wandered into her bedroom where she started to disrobe. She sat on the bed and on her nightstand was a picture of her and Josh. It was a picture of them at the Inauguration Balls after he had come and picked her up after discovering that she lied about the quote. He brought Toby, Will, Charlie and Danny to her apartment. They stood out in the street throwing snowballs at her window. She remembered how romantic she thought it was. She picked up the picture and examined it. Josh had brought it as a present when he returned the engagement ring that Andi had found. Who was the smiling blonde staring back her? She threw the picture across the room it shattered against the wall. Suddenly she released her anger on the rest of the room. She started throwing things, breaking things, shredding things. Her room was left in complete disarray when she finally headed into the bathroom to take her bath.  
She stepped into the scolding hot water. She didn't care, she said down not feeling her sensitive skin burning. She shut off the water and laid back into the water.  
This was the worst day of her life. But what she couldn't remember, what she couldn't think of...what was the point of getting up tomorrow morning. There was nothing for her now.  
  
After Josh got off the phone he decided that he needed to find Donna. He went over to her apartment to find a disaster waiting for him. Donna was lying in the bathtub unconscious and it looked like she had slit her wrists. The ambulance arrived in short order, but he had no idea how long she had been bleeding, how long she had been unconscious. For the second time that year he wondered if he would ever see Donnatella's smile.  
He waited in the hospital waiting room. C.J. and Sam showed up shortly after.  
"What the hell happened?" Sam was extremely upset.  
"It looks like she tried to kill herself," Josh muttered.  
"God." C.J. sat down.  
Sam just stared at his best friend. "How did this happen? She was fine."  
"Obviously she wasn't fine. She had stopped talking to me, she got fired for getting into a fight and she tried committing suicide, obviously she _WASN'T FINE_!" Josh yelled.  
Sam grabbed Josh by the upper arms and shook him a little. "This isn't your fault."  
"Shouldn't I have seen this?"  
"Josh, don't you dare blame yourself for this," C.J. wrapped her arm around her friend's shoulders.  
"Josh?" The three of them turned around.  
Josh had a look of relief. "I'm so glad you could come."  
  
Donna woke up with a bad headache. She had no idea where she was; she recognized the surroundings enough to know that she was in a hospital. Part of her wondered if she ever got out of Germany, if that last few months had been a dream. It was then that she saw a familiar face staring at her.  
"Hi, Donna."  
"What are you doing here?"  
"Josh asked me to come."  
"I'm fine."  
"I don't think you are."  
"Look, I appreciate that Josh asked you to come, but I'm fine."  
"You're sitting in a hospital again because you slit your wrists, does that sound fine to you."  
"I didn't die, now did I?"  
Donna felt like her world was spinning out of control. She turned and looked at the older man. "Where is Josh?"  
"He's out in the waiting room. He didn't think that you would want to see him, so he sent me in here."  
"What does he think that you can just fix me, Stanley?"  
"He knows better than that, but he hopes that's what I'm going to do."  
Donna smirked. Stanley knew Josh well. She supposed it wasn't that hard to figure out, but nonetheless.  
"What happened, Donna?"  
  
Josh was pacing back and fourth outside the main entrance to the hospital on his cell phone. "Hi, Mrs. Moss. I wanted you to know that the doctor just came out and told me that she's awake and that she's doing well."  
"Oh thank god! Have you seen her?"  
"No, not yet."  
"Is everything okay between the two of you?"  
"I'm not sure. Look, I don't know if Donna told you but a few years ago after I was shot I developed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and I talked to a guy."  
"I do remember Donna was worried sick. She didn't sleep until she took you to the hospital that night."  
Josh closed his eyes for a moment, feeling sick for having worried her so much. "Well I flew Stanley in, the guy I talked to. I figured that if he can help me, he can help any body. He even sat with the President for a while."  
"Thank you so much, Josh."  
"I'm so sorry, Mrs. Moss."  
"You just take of yourself. Let me know if there are any changes and have her call me when she's ready."  
Josh hung up the phone a few minutes later and wandered back into the waiting room. Sam and C.J. had been replaced with Mallory, Carol, and Margaret. Josh sat down across from the three women.  
  
Hours later everyone had disappeared; Josh was left alone in the waiting room. He was starting to doze off reading the latest issue of In Style.  
"Josh?" Stanley's voice brought everything back into focus.  
"How is she?"  
Stanley held out his hand and helped Josh to his feet. "I never saw a couple better suited for each other. I thought that three years ago and I still do. I don't know where either of you would be without the other. I think you two have saved each other's lives on many accounts. She's going to be fine. You were right she does have PTSD. I'm coming by tomorrow morning to do some more talking with her. She was very tired by the end of our conversation but she asked me to send you in."  
Josh felt relieved. Stanley always made him feel better. "Thank you."  
"She's still a little raw and probably will be for a while. Just take it easy with her and be patient."  
"Yes, sir," Josh replied.  
"Go in and see her and then go get some sleep."  
Josh headed for Donna's room slowly. He peered in and she saw him right away. He leaned in the doorway feeling helpless and angry that he had allowed her to be put back into a hospital bed so soon.  
"Come closer," she called.  
Josh approached the bed and looked down at her pale face.  
"I'm so sorry, Joshua!" she sobbed.  
Josh leaned in and caressed her cheek. "Shhh, it's okay."  
"I never meant to..."  
"It's okay. I know. I know." Josh glanced over her bandaged wrists and then back to her face. She started to calm down; her eyes were heavy with exhaustion. "Go to sleep. I'll be here when you wake up." Josh quietly pulled the chair over to her and sat beside her.  
"I love you, Donnatella," he whispered as he watched her as she started to doze off. "Please come back to me." 


	14. Every Time

_Disclaimers-I kind of forgot about these so I just thought 14 chapters in was a good place to start. The West Wing is in no way any part of mine-all the characters belong to Aaron Sorkin, NBC and now John Wells. Also Every Time by Britney Spears is hers and she sings it well._

_Thanks so much to all of you who are reading my stories and a special thanks to TheRealMcCoy for reviewing. I enjoy and look forward to seeing what you have to say. I've never written a song fic, I hope it isn't too sappy, but this song seemed perfect for what I thought they might be feeling. Anyway, enjoy!_

* * *

_Notice me, take my hand _

_Why are we strangers when _

_Our love is strong _

_Why carry on without me  
_  
Josh sat in the hospital chair, his eyes fixated on Donna. He was afraid that if he fell asleep, if he looked away for one moment that she would be gone. Every time he looked away something bad seemed to happen to the ones he loved. He had lost his sister, he had lost his father, the President had been shot and then he had lost Donna, then she almost died but as if life was reminding him how unfair it was, he almost lost her again. She looked so small and delicate curled into the hospital blankets. He stared at her wrists feeling cold and sad that she thought that was her answer. He couldn't believe that she thought she had lost so much that only death would bring her redemption.

_Everytime I try to fly, I fall_

_Without my wings, I feel so small _

_I guess I need you, baby _

_And everytime I see you in my dreams _

_I see your face, it's haunting me _

_I guess I need you, baby  
_  
It was nearly dawn before Josh let his eyes drift shut. His hand held hers, touching her he felt anchored to her and would know if she needed him. Slowly his eyes closed and he was whisked off into his dreams where Donnatella Moss was always in his arms and she never wanted to be anywhere else.  
  
_I make believe that you are here _

_It's the only way I see clear _

_What have I done _

_You seem to move on easy  
_  
Donna opened her eyes a few hours before dawn to find Josh sleeping soundly next to her. She felt his hand holding hers and she smiled weakly. She couldn't believe that she had gotten to his place in her life. She never wanted to feel that way again. She loved Josh, her family and her friends, why she ever thought that she never had answers was beyond her. She took a long look Josh. He looked so young when he slept.  
She felt the cold metal of the engagement ring around her neck. She wouldn't be so stupid. She had her second if not third chance at life now. Every time she thought they were so close something seem to get in the way. No more. She wanted to be his; she wanted to spend the rest of her life loving him; if he would still have her.  
  
_And everytime I try to fly, I fall _

_Without my wings, I feel so small _

_I guess I need you, baby _

_And everytime I see you in my dreams _

_I see your face, you're haunting me _

_I guess I need you, baby  
_  
Donna had thought about their life together, their wedding, their home, their children. She had no trouble envisioning a Joshua Junior running around the house with his toy donkey. His first words would be "Congress sucks" followed by "Democrats Rule" and hopefully some where in there he would learn "Mommy" and "Daddy."  
Every time she thought about all the times that they almost lost each other it was ridiculous, how did they end up with so many chances?  
  
_I may have made it rain _

_Please forgive me _

_My weakness caused you pain _

_And this song's my sorry  
_  
_I need you_, she thought.  
Donna clutched his hand wanting to feel close to him some how. She didn't know what was going to happen when the morning came. She just hoped that he wouldn't hate her forever, that he would find it in his heart to give her one more chance. That was all she needed to make this right. Just one more chance.  
  
_At night I pray _

_That soon your face will fade away  
_  
Donna finally fell back to sleep. Her dreams were full of hopeful images of her future, of their future together. She remembered the nights that she wished she wouldn't have feelings for Josh that it just made everything too complicated, but in the end her heart had won out and now all she wanted was to find her way back into his arms.  
  
_And everytime I try to fly, I fall _

_Without my wings, I feel so small _

_I guess I need you, baby _

_And everytime I see you in my dreams _

_I see your face, you're haunting me _

_I guess I need you, baby_


	15. I Asked You First

"Josh?"  
His eyes fluttered open and the first thing he was greeted with was Donna's glowing face. She had improved a hundred percent. Her cheeks had color, her hair was mussed from sleeping and her eyes were brighter than they had been all week.  
Josh sat up in his chair. "Hi, you."  
She managed a weak smile. "Hi. You should've gone home. Your back is probably killing you."  
"How do you do that?"  
Donna tilted her head. "What?"  
"Worry about me when you're the one sitting in the hospital. You did it in Germany too."  
"I worry. You don't take care of yourself."  
"I do take care of myself."  
"Josh!"  
"Okay, I don't take care of myself. But you haven't been taking care of yourself, and I'm trying to do what you do, but you're way better at it than I am."  
Donna's smile widened. "I'm way better at a lot of things."  
Josh chuckled. "How are you feeling?"  
"I'm okay. I feel horrible about what I did to every one more than anything. What I did to you." Her smile faded.  
"Don't, Donna."  
"Josh, I'm so sorry," she sobbed.  
Josh stood up and wrapped his arms around her. "Don't worry about it. I'm just thrilled you're okay. And Stanley is a miracle worker. Look what he did for me."  
Josh felt her laugh against his chest. He smiled and smoothed her hair out of her face.  
"There's something I have to tell you."  
Josh sat back and looked at her. "What?"  
"There is a reason why I knew what was happening to you that Christmas, there's a reason why I went through what I went through."  
Josh's eyebrows furrowed. "I know why you..."  
"No, it isn't just because of the car bomb. There's more."  
Josh just waited silently for her to continue.  
"When I was sixteen my cousin, Lydia, and I would drive the dirt roads in Wisconsin for hours, at night especially. Well, one night we were with a couple of our guy friends and they brought beer. We were all drinking and swerving around the roads. It was Lydia's turn to drive. Well another car was on the road and Lydia decided that playing chicken sounded like a good idea. We were on a bridge when we collided with the car. I was immediately thrown from the car; I was the only one who wasn't wearing a seat belt. Turns out it saved my life, the other two cars went off the bridge and into the river." Donna was sobbing hard now. Josh just listened in horror. "It was horrible. I woke up in the hospital to find out that my friends; my cousin and the woman and child that we hit were all dead. They were all dead." She took a moment to try and compose herself. "I had a really bad reaction. It was PTSD and it was survivor's guilt. I was never the same after that. Here I am again and I'm the only survivor."  
Josh wiped away the tears streaming down her cheeks. "You are so brave, Donnatella. You amaze me so much." He took a deep breath. "Did you tell Stanley this?"  
"She doesn't have to."  
Josh and Donna turned to see Stanley leaning in the doorway. "I'm sorry to eavesdrop."  
Donna shrugged and Josh stood up and shook the man's hand.  
"Well, Donna Moss, I think you just helped yourself a lot all by yourself. I'd still like to talk to you a little then I'm going to recommend a therapist for you."  
Donna nodded.  
"I'm going to go outside," Josh said as he kissed her on the forehead.  
"Why don't you go home and take a shower. I just talked to the doctor's out there; she can go home when I give the okay. Go home take a shower, and then come pick her up and take her home, get some Chinese food and watch a movie. Something other than Die Hard, Josh."  
He smiled sheepishly. "Is that an order?"  
"Yes," Stanley affirmed.  
"He's tough." He kissed her again. "I'll be back in an hour."  
  
Josh's cell phone rang just as he left the hospital. "Hello?"  
"How is she?"  
"She's much better this morning," Josh replied. He heard Sam's sigh of relief. "She's talking with Stanley right now."  
"I've been up all night worrying about her. When are they releasing her?"  
"Stanley says they'll release her when he gives the okay. I'm going home to shower and then I'm coming back to pick her up, I hope."  
"Excellent. Look if you two need anything, please let us know."  
"Us?"  
"Mallory, C.J. and Danny are sitting here with me. We're all a little shaken up."  
"Yeah."  
  
"Josh, I don't want to go back to my apartment," Donna said quietly.  
"Do you want to stay with me?"  
"Can I?"  
"Of course."  
"Josh, please think about it a moment, I've said some pretty horrible..."  
"Donna, if we're giving out awards for that, then I'd win, so please don't think that I'm going to be mad at you...I mean, that Christmas you took me to the hospital and you stood there while the doctor gave me a shot and stitched my hand up. You brought my coat and you went home with me just to make sure that everything was okay. Don't think that you could ever do anything to make me turn my back on you, Donnatella Moss." Josh glanced at her as he drove to his apartment. He put his hand on her knee and squeezed it gently.  
Donna slid her hand over his and squeezed back. He could feel her body shaking with tears. He didn't move his hand until they arrived at his apartment. He parked the car and helped her up to his apartment.  
"Do you need anything?"  
"Yeah, a job."  
"About that, I can talk to someone in your..."  
"No," Donna interrupted. "I can't go back there. I can't show my face there ever again."  
"Donna," Josh started.  
"No, Josh."  
He relented. "Are you hungry?"  
"A little."  
"How about I order some pizzas and I'll call Sam, C.J., Toby and their significant other who have been worried sick about you, and have them over for dinner?" suggested Josh.  
"Not tonight. Definitely tomorrow, but not tonight."  
"Okay."  
Donna wandered into Josh's bathroom and stared at her reflection. It was the first time in a week that she recognized herself in the mirror. She felt sick to her stomach still. She couldn't believe what she had done. She had ruined everything. She let out a long sigh.  
"Donna?" Josh's voice was quiet on the other side.  
"Yeah?"  
"Do you need anything?"  
She lowered her head. Her thoughts were weighed down with guilt and shame. "I'm fine," she said out loud.  
"Okay, well I'll be out here if you need anything."  
_I need you_, she thought to herself.  
  
The next morning Donna woke up in Josh's bedroom. She had to memory of how she got there. She had fallen asleep on the couch with ever intention of sleeping there. Josh must've moved her. She felt around the other side of the bed. There was no one. She got up and slumped out into the living room and sure enough there was Josh sprawled out all over the couch.  
She knelt down next to him. "Josh," she called.  
He stirred immediately. "You okay?" he mumbled.  
"I'm fine. What are you doing out here?"  
"Sleeping," he yawned.  
She rolled her eyes. "I can see that, but why aren't you in your bed."  
"That's where you were."  
"So?"  
"I wasn't sure...I just decided to crash out here to give you your space." His eyes were still half closed.  
"Josh, did I ruin everything?"  
He opened his eyes and met her gaze. "No, why on earth would you think that?"  
"I just feel like I messed everything up. You've had enough pain and suffering in your life you don't need me making matters worse. I mean, Josh, I got fired from my job, I yelled at you and said unforgivable things and I..."  
"Donna, I yelled at the President, I yelled at you, I put my hand through a window. Shit happens!" he interjected.  
Donna sat there for a moment and stared at him. "Stanley said that you and I are a match made in Heaven."  
"Yeah?"  
"He said that I definitely complete the complexities of you and you complete the simplicities of me. I wasn't sure what it meant, but he's probably right."  
"You going to let me talk to your boss at OEOB?"  
"No, I really don't want to go back there."  
"Okay, okay. Do you want me to help you look for a job or just stay out of it?"  
"I'm not sure."  
"Donna, it's six o'clock in the morning. Is there anything you are sure of?"  
"I love you," she whispered. "You asked me what I needed last night, I need you."  
Josh pulled her onto him. Her body stretched over his. He lightly caressed her cheek and looked at her face. "I need you too."  
Donna held her closed hand on his chest so he could see what she was doing. She opened her hand and the engagement ring and chain fell onto his chest. "I've been holding onto this since you gave it to me. I wanted to tell you over and over again that I love you and I want to marry you and that there is no one I would rather spend the rest of my life with. Things just seemed to get more and more complicated. I'm pretty sure that they're as bad as they're going to get. I love you and I need you in my life. I want to wake up with you next to me and I want you to whine that I designed our house too girly and that you hate our sons middle name and that if any of our children turn out to be a Republican you're blaming me." She took a deep breath. "Will you marry me, Joshua Lyman?"  
Josh stared at her for a long moment and slowly a smug smile curved over his lips. His dimples were showing and his eyes were glistening with emotion. "Okay, but just as long as we're clear I asked first."  
"That's not how I remember it."  
"You've had the ring for months, Donnatella."  
"Yes, but technically you never asked."  
Josh grabbed the ring from her and slipped it on her finger before she could change her mind. She started to cry and not that he would ever admit it, but so did he. They pressed their lips together and kissed each other thoroughly.  
"As much as I would love to continue this...we have to call my mother, she told me that if I didn't call her five minutes with in the engagement ring being put on that she would give me the spanking of my life."  
Donna kissed down his neck. "How would she know?"  
"Oh she'll know and she's not bluffing about the spanking either."  
She giggled, her whole body shaking. "Then we'd better call her because if anyone is going to be spanking you, Joshua, it's going to be me."  
Without changing their position Josh reached over to the coffee table and grabbed the phone.  
"Mom? I know it's early but I just wanted to tell you..." he paused. "How do you do that?"  
Donna raised an eyebrow. She watched Josh talk to his mother and soon he was off the phone. "She knew?"  
"My mother scares me just a little bit."  
"We should call my mother too, but I think I'm going to have to have a longer conversation with her."  
"Yeah."  
"Can we call her later?" Donna asked while she straddled him and pulled off her shirt.  
Josh just stared at her bare breasts. "Later is good."  
  
That night as Donna promised their friends came over. C.J. and Danny were the first to show. C.J. grabbed Donna and hugged her for a long time. They finally pulled apart.  
"I'm sorry, I'm just really glad to see you doing so well," C.J. gushed.  
Donna smiled. "Come in, the pizza will be here soon.  
There was another knock at the door. Donna opened the door and on the other side was Toby and Sam.  
"Hi, guys."  
Sam smiled, "You look really good, Donna."  
"You don't look so bad yourself, Mr. Seaborn. Come in, please." She held the door open for them. "Where is Andi and Mallory?"  
"Andi apologizes she had to work late and she couldn't find a babysitter, so she decided to stay home. She wishes you a speedy recovering and she says that she'll call to do lunch some time soon."  
"Yeah and Mallory is a little under the weather. She said to tell you that she'll call and invite herself to the lunch with you and Andi."  
"Great!" Donna felt a pair of hands on her hips as if to steady her. She leaned back into Josh's embrace. She noticed that everyone in the room seemed to be staring at them, studying them.  
"There's something different about the two of you," C.J. stated.  
Danny was already smiling.  
"What do you know that I don't know?"  
Danny shrugged his shoulders but he gave Donna a knowing look.  
"Different how?" Josh asked.  
"You seem in sink, you've always been that way, but ever since the abortion clinic incident it's been off some how but now you seem like you've never been more in sink than you are right now."  
"I don't know what to tell you, C.J.," Donna replied as she headed for the kitchen. "Would anyone like something to drink?"  
They called out their drink orders and a few minutes later the pizza came. They gathered around the living room talking, laughing and telling stories.  
"Seriously, something's different," C.J. claimed.  
Josh looked down at Donna. She was wound in his arms, snuggled against his chest. "Something different?" he asked.  
"I don't know." Donna reached her left hand up to hold Josh's making sure that he hand caught the light just right.  
"Wow, that's some rock, Donna!" C.J. said smiling and then her smile grew wider. "That's what's different!" she exclaimed.  
"Took you long enough," Toby muttered.  
C.J. swatted him. "When?"  
"This morning actually," Josh replied. "I want it to be made clear that I asked first."  
"You did not ask, you gave the ring as a parting gift and then this morning I asked you."  
"That's so romantic, but Donna, you have to leave the men something to do. Proposing is one of the last things they have."  
"He'll make up for it plenty, don't worry."  
"Hey, I don't like where this is leading."  
"You're realize that in life we actually have very little control, Josh," Sam replied. "But congratulations anyway!"  
Sam cell phone went off suddenly. He pulled it off of his hip and flipped it open. "Sam Seaborn. Mallory?" He listened carefully for a moment. "Slow down, I can't understand a word...no, no, I understood that. When did you? How did you? No, no."  
Everyone watched Sam have a very tense conversation.  
"I'll be there in a little bit. Just let me...yes, she's fine. She looks good. Her and Josh are engaged as of this morning. I will. Do you need anything? Okay, well just sit tight."  
He closed the phone.  
"Is Mallory okay?" asked Donna.  
"I'm not quite sure. She's pregnant which explains why she's been sick a lot lately. Not in the mornings though. It's usually right before dinner. By the way she says congratulations."  
"Sam?" C.J. asked.  
"Yeah?"  
"Mallory's pregnant?"  
"Yeah, she got the confirmation from the doctor and six pregnancy tests."  
Donna smiled and then frowned. "Can I be happy for you or..."  
"I don't know. I haven't even had a chance to tell Mallory I love her and she's pregnant and oh my god, Leo is going to hunt me down and kill me."  
Josh and Toby started laughing.  
Donna and C.J. were just ooing and awing over the idea of a baby Seaborn.  
"You should go talk with her," Donna suggested. "Tell her how you feel. You never want to wait to long for stuff like that." She leaned into Josh's touch as he squeezed her gently.  
"Yeah, I should go."  
"Sam, congratulations once the shock is over, okay, buddy?" Josh said smiling at his friend.  
Sam waved and headed out.  
The remaining five cleaned up and got their things together. Toby, C.J. and Danny said their good-byes and headed home.  
Donna closed the door behind them. "We can never just have a normal gathering. Something always has to be happening, national emergencies, engagements, break ups, pregnancies and lord knows what else."  
Josh pulled Donna into his arms. "Now that we've told people can we please set a date."  
"Josh, we haven't told Leo or the President for that matter. He's going to be upset you didn't propose and that I had to do it."  
"I knew that some how all this was going to end up my fault. Fine tomorrow you're coming to lunch and we're going to tell the President together and then you're going to sit down with me and plan a date to get married. Then we're going to talk about kids."  
"Not until you're out of office."  
"What kind of silly request is that? I'll never be out of office. Once the four years are up you know it will just be somebody else."  
"Yes, but working in the White House is the biggest more important thing you'll ever do."  
"Not more important than marrying you and certainly not more important that having children with you."  
"You say that now, but look at Toby and his kids. Look at Leo and his marriage. The only reason why you and I work so well together with all of this is because I was there for the first six in a half years. I know what it is, what it means. No kids until after you're out of the White House."  
"What if I get a job working for the next President?"  
"Well cross that bridge when we get to it."  
"You have an answer for everything don't you."  
"Yes."  
"You do realize that you wanted to wait for us to get together until after we were out of the White House?"  
Donna rolled her eyes. "It doesn't matter. Today I'm saying that we should wait, tomorrow I may end up pregnant so just relax would you!"  
"You're not going to end up pregnant tomorrow right?"  
"I make no promises, but I'm pretty sure we're good."  
"Excellent."  
"Why are you so worried all of the sudden?"  
"Because Leo's going to kill Sam for knocking up his daughter, well the President thinks of you like a daughter and so does Leo for that matter. I would be as dead as Sam!"  
Donna smiled. She leaned in and kissed him tenderly. "You know what, just shut up and take me to bed." 


	16. Messed Up

"Hi, Leo," Sam chirped.  
"What's with you?" Leo asked as he straightened his tie.  
"Nothing," he squeaked.  
"I thought Mallory was coming with you."  
"She'll be here in a minute," Sam replied making sure that there was always a good distance between him and Leo.  
"Do you know why C.J. and Danny moved up the wedding?"  
"I do in fact know why."  
"Well? Why?"  
Sam fidgeted anxiously. "Why what?"  
Leo just rolled his eyes. "Seriously, man, what is with you?"  
"Nothing."  
"Daddy, you look wonderful." Mallory's voice made Sam jump.  
"Hi, sweetheart." Leo beamed and kissed his daughter on the cheek. "Mal, do you know what's wrong with Sam?"  
"I do. He's scared of you right now."  
Leo's eyebrows furrowed. "Why?"  
"He's afraid you're going to hurt him when you find out that I'm pregnant and it's his."  
"Why would he be afraid of me...you're what? It's whose?" Leo snarled.  
"Daddy, calm down!" Mallory interjected, "Sam and I have been dating for a while now and I'm pregnant," Mallory said calmly.  
Leo just sat there and fumed for a minute. "How pregnant are you?"  
"Two months and one week."  
"Have you two talked about what you're going to do?" Leo asked while he glared at Sam.  
"Not exactly. We haven't had time to actually do that. Once C.J. found out I was pregnant and a couple of other things happened she decided that it was best to move up the wedding, that's why it's happening today and Sam and I have been doing everything we can to help with the wedding, so no we haven't talked about everything yet."  
"Leo..." Sam trailed off when he saw Leo glare at him again. "Mr. McGarry, I love Mallory, and even though I haven't had a chance to tell her that, I do, and I plan on being there for whatever decision she wants to make. Eventually I'm going to ask her to marry me, but I didn't want her to think that it was because she was pregnant that that was why I was asking. I would want to marry her child or not. So, please, sir, don't kill me!" Sam pleaded.  
"Go away from me right now!" Leo snarled.  
Sam quickly dissipated out of the room. He ran into Danny in the church.  
"How'd it go?" Danny asked.  
"The good news is that he didn't kill me, the bad news is that I'm pretty sure he's going to later."  
  
"I look good," Josh said while studying himself in the mirror.  
"You think?" asked Donna.  
"I definitely have to say that this is one of the better tuxes I've worn. I look damn good. The groomsmen are going to look good, but I look great."  
"Well in the honor of tradition I look like an idiot," she huffed.  
Josh turned around and looked at Donna who was wearing a light blue dress that seemed to be made of tool mostly. He smirked, "Donna, you look beautiful."  
"You said that last night when I was covered in pasta that you spilled on me."  
"You looked all cute and noodley."  
"Let's just get going, Joshua!"  
They headed to the church.  
"I can't believe C.J. is getting married." Donna said as she stared at the numerous photographers.  
"I can't believe she gave out press credentials."  
"What do you care? You look great! I on the other hand look like Little Bo Peep. C.J. has great taste and this is a great dress but I look awful in it."  
"I think you're over exaggerating."  
"How so?"  
"Little Bo Peep wears white doesn't she? And clearly you have no sheep."  
"Josh! You aren't helping."  
He smirked. "You look great, Donnatella. Just smile and cry and giggle like women do at these things and tell me how good I look."  
Donna just glared at him.  
They pulled up in front of the church. Donna got out and was greeted by Mallory and Andi. "Donna, come quick!" They grabbed her. Donna gave Josh a quick wave before she was pulled into the church.  
"What's going on?" Donna asked.  
Andi started, "C.J.'s, what's the word..."  
"Flipping out?" Mallory interjected.  
"Having a difficult time adjusting to her wedding day," Andi finished.  
"That doesn't sound good." Donna replied. "We need morale. We need you. You'll be able to talk her down," Mallory suggested.  
They entered a small room in the back of the church where C.J. was sitting calmly in her lingerie, stockings and heels and nothing more. Donna had to give her props, Danny was going to have a hard time talking tonight, she looked amazing.  
"C.J.?" Donna felt like she was approaching a wild animal.  
"Hi, Donna," C.J. said forcefully.  
"What's going on?"  
"I'm not sure I can do this."  
"Get married?"  
"Yes, but more importantly, I don't know if I can be a wife. I've never done it before. I could be bad at it."  
Donna smiled. "C.J., I've never seen you do badly at anything you've ever tried. You're the White House Press Secretary for crying out loud. You can do anything and marrying Danny is going to be the easiest thing to do in this life. I promise."  
"Really? Then why do I feel like I'm about to make a mistake?"  
"Because you're scared. Because getting married is a big deal and a big commitment and in this time and place not a lot of marriages survive."  
"So it's fine?"  
Donna nodded her head.  
"You're sure?" C.J. looked at Donna with worried eyes. "I don't know if I can take this kind of pressure."  
"C.J., you heard the part where I said that you were the White House Press Secretary right? You had to give a press conference when you were shot at, you had to give a press conference when the President announced he had MS and you had a camera following you around all day during a very high stressed situation, and you think you can't handle pressure? You're wrong."  
C.J. looked at her friend for a long moment. "It's fine."  
"Oh, yeah. Once you put on the dress you'll feel like a million bucks and then you'll see Danny standing at the end of the isle and it'll be the best moment of your life until the preacher pronounces you man and wife."  
C.J. looked like she was about to cry.  
"Now get dressed, before you ruin your make-up," Donna instructed.  
She nodded and stood up and headed over to the pile of white lace, tool and silk.  
  
"Why are you sitting out here?" Josh asked as he approached Sam.  
"I'm not allowed in Leo's line of vision until the actual wedding and then I'm not allowed in his vision again until he Okays it."  
"Told him about Mal?"  
"Yeah," Sam muttered.  
Josh sat down next to his best friend. "How'd it go?"  
"He doesn't want me in his line of sight, Josh."  
"You're still standing."  
"Excellent point."  
"Where's Donna?"  
"She's with the women. I came here to be with the men," Josh grunted.  
"The men are inside." He pointed to the closed door behind him.  
"Have you and Mal talked about..."  
"Don't go there right now. She's a little mad at me too right now, because I told her father that I loved her and that I wanted to marry her before I told her, so she's not speaking to me either."  
"It's just not your day is it?" Josh couldn't help but smirk a little.  
"Not so much."  
  
"Let me get this straight, you're pregnant too?" Andi asked.  
"Yep."  
"And that's why you moved the wedding up?"  
"Yep," C.J. replied.  
"That's also why you were flipping out about getting married, because you were freaking out about being a mother too?"  
"Yep."  
"C.J., are you okay?" asked Donna.  
"Not so much. I'm the White House Press Secretary, where am I going to find the time to be a mother, a wife and you know a mother!"  
"It's hard, but you'll manage," Andi replied.  
"What did Danny say?"  
"He's ecstatic."  
"That's promising," Donna murmured.  
"When are you due?" Andi continued.  
"I'm just a little over three months. I wanted to get married while I was still fitting in the very expensive dress that I bought and then when Mallory said she was pregnant it just seemed even more logical because I wanted her to fit in the dress too."  
"Gotcha!"  
The women sat in silence for a moment. Donna spoke first, "Have you and Sam talked about what you're..."  
"I'm not even talking to Sam right now!" Mallory snapped.  
"Why not?" C.J. questioned.  
"He told my father that he loved me and he told my father that he wanted to marry me before he even discussed any of it with me."  
"He loves you?" Andi inquired.  
"And he wants to marry you?" Donna squeaked.  
"Well that's what he told my father, who is now furious with Sam. He won't even look at me in the eye."  
"I thought for sure he would be thrilled that it was Sam. Leo loves Sam like a son." Donna replied.  
"True, but not as much as he loves me as his only daughter. I know he'll come around, but all of this just feels really messed up right now."  
"What isn't messed up right now?" C.J. muttered.  
Andi chuckled, "She's right." Andi glanced around the room. "C.J.'s getting married in about a half hour, she's three months pregnant, Mallory is two in a half months pregnant and the father tells her father before he tells her that he loves her and wants to marry her, Donna over here is finally engaged to the man that she's been in love with forever, it took reporters, a shooting, a car bomb, and some help from their friends to get their sorry butts together and then there's me who has twins that belongs to Toby and he's finally starting to come around and be a father to them but I can't decide if I want to take another chance with him or not."  
"Who wants a drink?" C.J. countered.  
  
"Okay, see the thing is, there wasn't supposed to be a guy good enough for Mallory."  
Sam peered up at Leo who was looming over him with a very intimidating glare. "Yes, sir."  
"I know that you care about Mallory, but don't expect me to be thrilled at the idea of you getting her pregnant at least not without being married. I'm a liberal guy but she's my daughter."  
"I understand, sir."  
"You promise to take care of her?"  
Sam suddenly felt a rush of protectiveness and pride. "With my life, sir."  
"You promise to take care of that child?"  
"Also with my life, sir."  
Leo let out a long frustrated sigh. "You're a good man, Seaborn, but if you hurt either of them, you're in big trouble!"  
"Yes, sir." Sam swallowed hard.  
Leo held out his hand. "Come here, son." Sam accepted his handshake and was surprised when he pulled Sam into a tight embrace. "Now go find my daughter and apologize for whatever it is that you did, the wedding is going to start soon."  
"Yes, sir."  
Sam waited for Leo to go back into the room before he moved. He turned and saw Mallory hovering in the doorway. She wiped away the tears streaming down her face.  
"Mallory, I'm so sorry for..."  
"Just shut up, Sam!" Mallory pulled him to her and kissed him hard. She pulled away and looked at him. "We'll talk tonight. I'll see you in a while." Then she was gone.  
Sam stood there looking dumbfounded. "I do not understand the McGarry family."  
  
The wedding reception was held in an enchanting hotel. Neither Danny nor C.J. were in a good place employment wise to take a real honeymoon, but they promised each other they would take one soon and some where tropical.  
"I can't believe C.J. is married," Donna leaned over and whispered to Josh as they watched the newly married couple moving across the dance floor for their first dance as husband and wife.  
"We would now like to invite all our other couples out here to join them," the D.J. announced.  
Donna watched the couples around her standing up and floating out to the dance floor. When she turned back to Josh he was standing holding his hand out for hers. She blushed and accepted his hand.  
"You look surprised," Josh murmured as he pulled her into his arms.  
"I am a little," she replied as they started swaying to the elegant music drifting through the air.  
"Why?"  
"First of all, Joshua, you don't dance. Second of all, besides the having sex bit, our relationship hasn't changed that much and I'm so used to being at weddings alone that I forget some times that I'm with you."  
"First of all, I do dance, I just don't like to show off," he said as he dipped Donna. "Second of all, I can't believe you forgot that you're in a relationship with me, I'm not quite sure how to take that!"  
"That's not what I meant," replied Donna as she tried to catch her breath after Josh spun her around a couple of times.  
"I know what you meant. I kind of feel like we've both been so busy with work, you finding a job, this wedding and you know work that we've hit a slump in our relationship. We haven't done much. This is pretty much the first real public thing we've had since we've become a real couple, not to mention an engaged couple. We've been so busy we haven't even set a date."  
"I know. I don't think we should worry about setting a date right now. Work is your priority right now and I need and want to find a job."  
"I hate not seeing you all the time."  
"I know, me too."  
They were silent for a little bit while the music continued to drift over them. Donna nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck. Josh rested his head against her, his fingers drawing lazy circles down her back.  
"I think you should move in with me," Josh said suddenly.  
Donna pulled back and looked at him. "What?"  
"I'm serious. I want to wake up with you in my arms."  
"You do."  
"Every morning, Donnatella."  
She smiled, "That's not what we discussed."  
"So, move in with me."  
"Don't you think we've been doing all this a little too fast?"  
"All of what?"  
"Everything, dating, getting engaged, sleeping together, and now you're talking about moving in together. It's been like six months since I got back from Germany."  
"I realize that, but I don't care. We waited six years before we had our first kiss, I can't see how this is rushing anything."  
"You're sure. You want me to move in?"  
"Absolutely." He lowered his mouth over hers and kissed her deeply.  
  
"They look happy," Sam commented.  
"I never thought they would ever get it together," C.J. replied.  
Toby scoffed, "I did."  
"I never pictured you as the hopeless romantic," Leo retorted.  
Toby turned and glared at his friend and boss. "Not hopeless, hopeful," he said finally.  
"Ah, Tobias, I knew you were a sucker for the mushy stuff," C.J. cooed.  
"If it gets out I'm hunting the three of you down first," he muttered.  
The four of them watched Josh and Donna dancing together on the dance floor. They silently wondered if they even noticed that the song had changed three times and that they were the only ones dancing on the dance floor.  
C.J. managed to find her way back to Danny and she pulled him back onto the dance floor. Leo stood in the back of the room and watched as Sam took Mallory out into the cool December night in the courtyard where he gave her his jacket so they could talk. Toby wandered back over to Andi and sat next to her whispering little comments into her ear that made her laugh out loud. Josh and Donna danced the rest of the night away in each other's arms.  
  
Donna had finally convinced Josh to come back to her place for a night. They were giggling and kissing their way into her apartment building. Donna stumbled backwards and instead of finding the hard wood of the door she found that she had run into a warm body. She pushed Josh back and turned around to make an apology but instead her mouth just dropped.  
"Ryan!" she exclaimed.  
"Hi, Donna." The man that stood in front of her was tall, dark and handsome. Josh thought he looked kind of familiar but he couldn't place the face immediately. He was sure that who ever he was Donna was surprised and not too happy to see him.  
"Josh Lyman." He held out his hand to the other man.  
"Ryan Reynolds."  
They shook hands.  
Donna stood between the two men as if to protect them from each other. "What are you doing here?" she hissed.  
"Your mom gave me your address when I told her I was coming to D.C., she thought you would be thrilled to see me."  
"My mother wouldn't do that. But my father would." Josh was surprised to hear Donna's voice so sharp.  
"You're father always liked me."  
"My father can be naïve," Donna retorted. "What do you want, Ryan?"  
"Just to tell you that I've come back for what is rightfully mine." Donna saw his gaze flicker to Josh and then back to her. "This must be the politician you've been seeing, your father told me about him."  
"Did he?" Josh asked still trying to figure out exactly what was going on.  
"Josh, go inside, I'll be right there," she said unlocking the door.  
Josh obeyed.  
Donna turned back to Ryan. "What are you doing here, Donna? Your father told me you were fired."  
"Ryan, you don't know anything about my life and I would really appreciate it if you would just stay out of it all together. You and I have nothing to say to each other."  
"We have plenty to say. Look, things were really messed up and I want to give us another chance."  
"I'm engaged, Ryan. I'm in love with Josh and I have been since before you and I broke up."  
"With that guy?" Ryan asked as if it were completely impossible.  
"That guy has more class than you'll ever have."  
  
"Donna, come on. I still love you and I'm not giving you up."  
"Where were you when I was in the hospital when the car I was in suddenly blew up? I'll tell you what, I don't know and I don't care, but I'll tell you right now, Josh didn't stop for a beer on his way to the airport to fly to Germany to be by my side. And we weren't even together then," Donna snapped.  
"Donna, you know damn well..."  
"I'm sorry, Ryan, but your time is up."  
Donna brushed passed him into her apartment. She locked the door, slipped out of her jacket, laid it on the couch and roamed into her bedroom. Josh was empting his pockets onto her vanity.  
"Sorry about that."  
Josh turned around and looked at her. "That was Dr. Freeride wasn't it?"  
Donna's gaze dropped to the floor. "Yes...it was." 


	17. You Came Back to Me in April

**Author's Notes:** _Thank all of you who have read and reviewed my story. I had a lot of fun! This was my first West Wing fan fic, in fact, it was my first fan fic. I am in the middle of a move and decided that this was a good place to end the story for right now. I have plans for a sequel but we'll see. I may try and write some other things. Anyway, thanks again, and I hope you enjoy the last chapter._

* * *

"What exactly did he want?" Josh leaned against the vanity as he watched Donna stare at the floor.  
"Nothing, Josh, please don't worry about it."  
"No offense, Donna, but you left me for this guy once already, how can I not worry?"  
"He came here for me, and I laughed at him just now. I told him to go away that he had his chance and it's over."  
"Why did he come back all of the sudden?"  
"I don't know."  
"Your father likes him," Josh stated.  
"So?"  
"Does that mean your father doesn't like me?"  
Donna sighed, "Josh, you have to understand that Ryan and I grew up together and my father thought we were going to get married. My father doesn't know you and you get blamed for me not making it out to Wisconsin a couple of times, you get blamed for Gaza and I'm sorry about that, but my mother loves you and she understands, my father is just protective of me."  
"Donna, we're supposed to be getting married and your father hates me?" Josh didn't like where this conversation was going. He was trying to keep all of his anger and jealousy in check but hearing about Donna's father and the fact that he liked Dr. Freeride was not helping anything.  
"He doesn't hate you."  
"But he blames me for the horrible things that happen in your life."  
Donna stepped forward and cupped Josh's face. "It doesn't matter what he thinks because I know the truth."  
"Donna, I won't marry you without your parents consent. Both of them."  
She let out a frustrated sigh, "Josh, my don't..."  
He interrupted, "Is this why you've been putting off calling them to tell them that we're engaged, you know that your father won't approve."  
Donna stood there silent for a moment.  
"I can't believe you! Why didn't you tell me?"  
"Josh, my father is more stubborn than you are and he's a traditionalist. He can't let go of stuff, he was mad at me when Ryan dumped me the first time around. He was even angrier when I left Wisconsin to work for the campaign. You can imagine how he felt when I left Ryan the second time around. We didn't talk for months. Then Rosslyn happened." Josh saw the emotions plague her expression. "My father asked me every time he talked to me if I was in love with you and if I was did I really think some big shot politician was going to ever love me back. He told me that it wasn't appropriate that I work for you if I had feelings for you. Imagine the scandal he said. Imagine what you would do to his career. Then it happened, that night in April when you bought me the flowers for our work anniversary. I told you what really happened, why I really came back to you, and I told you I wouldn't stop for red lights, that was the night that I realized I was in love with you. I had always sort of known, but..." she trailed off a moment. "Then MS happened and everyone was on damage control and everyone felt betrayed. I was in that room for almost forty-eight hours looking through those damn boxes. I was hurt by you, the President and I was in that room looking through all of those boxes when Ainsley came in and asked me..."  
Josh interrupted, "Why were you hurt by me?"  
"I'm not sure really. I guess because I had to hear it from Toby. You withdrew from me at that point instead of confiding in me. We sort of lost our rhythm and it was hard. So I went out on a blind date."  
"Calley," Josh stated.  
Donna nodded. "Then things between us just got progressively worse. My parents were furious that I had been called in for the deposition for the MS case. Then the diary incident happened and I didn't think I would ever see you look me in the eye again. My father blamed you for the President lying and he blamed you for the sadness in my voice after the diary. I never told them about it though, I never told a soul."  
"Neither did I. I have never hated anyone as much as I hate Calley for that night."  
"Josh, it was my fault. He was just trying to get the truth, he was a fair man and I got off easy."  
"I know, I know, but the fact of the matter is that I was so angry that you went out with him once, then I found out you saw him again, slept with him and then endangered your own well being, and then that night he got to read your diary, he got to see inside your soul, your thoughts and I was so jealous, hurt and angry I just wanted to kill him."  
Donna's bright blue teary eyes looked up to see him staring at her with an expression of possession she had never seen before. She felt consumed just standing there under his gaze. Shakily, she continued her story.  
"Shortly after you started seeing Amy I got a job offer from an old friend, I'm not sure you remember."  
"Oh, I remember."  
"Well, I deeply considered it, my parents begged me to take it. But you and I weren't the same anymore and you were dating Amy and I was dating some lawyer and I figured that there wasn't a problem anymore. We could work together and be co-workers and maybe friends again. At that point my parents backed off a little. Then something shifted again. When I started seeing Commander Wonderful as you like to call him, you started acting weird. Then the quote happened and you came to my apartment that night, throwing snowballs and I knew that nothing had changed, I was still in love with you, Jack was just a distraction from you. Then there was all the stuff in between that that freaked my family out. C.J. being stalked, the death threats I was getting, Zoey being kidnapped, the crashes and then Gaza, which led to PTSD and attempted suicide. My parents have been over protective since Lydia died in that car crash, and they would love nothing more than for me to be Ryan's housewife."  
"Donna, you just listed some very valid points that if I weren't in your life you would be safe. If it wasn't for me you would be safe in Wisconsin with you 2.5 children, worrying about PTA meetings, car pooling, girl scouts and feeding the dog. Being with me has made you..."  
"Alive!" she exclaimed. "Josh, I've made differences, I've helped!"  
"Yeah, and now you limp, have nightmares and got fired from you job!"  
"Josh, not one single ounce of that has anything to do with you," Donna yelled.  
"Yes, it does. It has everything to do with me!" Josh was yelling now too.  
"Don't do this to yourself," she whimpered.  
"Donna, the people around me get hurt, the people around me die."  
She glared at him. "The people around me get hurt, the people around me die," she retorted. "And we saved each other."  
"Maybe we should take a step back, things are..."  
"Don't do this, Josh,' Donna pleaded.  
"I can't..." He grabbed his things and left.  
  
Donna had spent the entire night pacing her living room trying to figure out what she was going to do. Finally around seven o'clock in the morning she picked up her phone.  
"Josh Lyman's office."  
"Hi, Mike."  
"Hi, Donna," he said nervously.  
"Is Josh around?"  
"He's in a meeting."  
Donna shook her head. Did Josh really expect her not to remember his old tricks. "Michael, I know he doesn't want to talk to me. I just want you to tell him that I called and that I'll be calling once an hour on the hour."  
"Okay." Mike took a breath. "If it's any consolation, I told him he was crazy."  
"Hey, he's confiding in you, that's great! You two must be doing well together."  
"Better. I think he likes me more than he leads on."  
"That's Josh for you. You're doing well." Donna sighed. "Tell him I called."  
"I will."  
Donna hung up the phone and started pacing again. This time her buzzer sounded. She knew it wasn't Josh, so who could it be. She punched the intercom. "Hello?"  
"It's Ryan."  
"Go away!"  
He buzzed again.  
"What?"  
"Five minutes."  
"Go away!"  
He buzzed again.  
And again.  
And again.  
Donna stormed into her bedroom and slammed the door shut. She turned on the radio and crossed her arms over her chest in defiance as the buzzer echoed through her entire apartment.  
  
Josh was pacing in his office when there was a small tap. Toby peek his head inside the door. "What are you doing?"  
"I'm pacing."  
"I can see that, why?"  
"I really don't want to talk about it with you."  
"Why not?"  
Josh stopped pacing and looked up at him. "You'll yell at me."  
"What did you do now?"  
Josh continued his pacing. Mike peeked his head in the door. "Josh?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Donna made her ten o'clock phone call."  
Josh stopped and looked over at his assistant. "What did she say?"  
"She said that she was making her ten o'clock call and that she'd talk to me in an hour."  
"Okay."  
"Do you want me to say anything to her?"  
Josh crossed his arms over his chest and let out a long sigh. "No," he said finally.  
Mike nodded and left the office.  
"Why is Donna calling you on the hour?"  
"We had a thing last night."  
"A fight?"  
"Not so much of a fight as it was finding out that her parents hate me and that I continuously endanger her life."  
"You're an idiot."  
"I'm really not in mood for a beating, Toby."  
"Well get in the mood, because C.J., Sam, Leo and the President are not the only ones who are over protective."  
Josh looked a little taken aback.  
Toby sat down in Josh's visitor's chair. "Start from the beginning."  
  
"That's it," she huffed. Donna grabbed her cell phone, keys, and her coat and headed outside. She stomped down the stairs to the outside stoop. "Stop it!" she snarled to Ryan as she opened the door.  
He looked slightly surprised. "Hi." He smiled.  
"No, me coming down here was not a good thing. Go away, Ryan. I love Josh, I will always love Josh."  
"You don't know that. There was a time you thought you'd never love anyone but me."  
"There was a time I thought you were a decent guy. We grow up and we learn to tell the real thing from guys like you."  
"Donna, your parents hate you being here. They want you closer to home. They want to know that you're going to be safe."  
"I am safe."  
"A car bombing in Gaza? Wasn't Josh shot too? I mean you call that safe?"  
"I'm alive. I'm healthy. Things are good for me. Ryan, I like who I am, what I've been doing. My life is good." She glanced at her wristwatch. "Hang on."  
She flipped open her cell phone and punched speed dial number 1. "Hi, Mike. Just making my eleven o'clock call. Anything new?" She paused. "Okay, well I'll talk to you soon." She closed the phone and turned her attention back to Ryan.  
"Why are you here, Ryan, after six years?"  
"Because I do love you. I love your family and I miss you. Six years and I can't get you out of my mind. Six years and I just want to hear your voice and see your face."  
Donna chuckled, "Go home, Ryan, I promise you'll find someone better. Someone who would make a good housewife."  
"I don't want a housewife."  
"Ryan, you've always wanted what you couldn't have."  
Donna stalked passed him and trotted down the steps.  
"Donna!" he called after her. They both stepped down onto the sidewalk at the same time. Ryan pulled her around to face him and then pressed his lips to hers. The more she struggled the more he tightened his grip.  
Donna pounded her fist against his chest and then suddenly she felt their bodies being yanked apart. She stumbled backwards and felt an arm snake around her waist to hold her steady while Ryan stumbled into a snow pile behind him. Donna turned to see Josh holding her in his arms.  
"You had your turn, Dr. Freeride, and you blew it," Josh stated.  
"Isn't that Donna's decision?" Ryan said getting to his feet.  
"You're right. Donna?" Josh looked down at the blonde beauty in his arms.  
"You had your turn, Dr. Freeride, and you blew it," Donna reiterated.  
Josh smirked smugly as he watched the man slip and slide down the sidewalk. Donna turned to Josh. "Not that I'm complaining but what are you doing here?"  
"The last fourteen hours apart were hell for me and I don't want to be away from you that long ever again. So, I think you should move in with me as soon as possible."  
"What changed your mind?"  
"You did." He wrapped his arm around her tighter. "Plus, I've decided that I'm going to be selfish and keep you. Your father will learn to like me and your family will trust me. But you have to promise me that you'll never leave me."  
Donna looked up into Josh's deep brown eyes. "I'll never leave you," she murmured and lightly brushed her lips against his.  
"Toby yelled at you didn't he?"  
Josh shrugged, "That man has a force to be reckoned with and I'm certainly not going to be the one who defies Toby. Plus he's generally right about these things. Oh and he found you a job by the way. You'll be back in the West Wing."  
"What? How?"  
"Let's just say he's got connections. Turns out he knows the President of the United States," Josh gloated.  
Donna giggled. "You're the best."  
"Just so we're clear, I love you and if you'll still have me, I very much want to get married."  
"Excellent, because I think I have the perfect date."  
"Yeah?"  
"April 2nd."  
Josh smiled, "Really? How so?"  
"Well you see I left you February..."  
"And came back to me in April."  
"That's right."  
"Can we call your family?"  
"Sure, but let's go inside, it's freezing out here." Donna cuddled up to Josh's side and wrapped her arms around him. They held on to each other and headed inside.  
  
"I can't go out there," Donna stared at the crowd of people in the Rose Garden of the White House.  
"Of course you can. Josh is waiting," C.J. replied.  
"This was a bad idea."  
"Why?" Andi asked.  
"Getting married at the White House?" Donna shrieked.  
"You can't say no to the President," Mallory grinned. She stroked her protruding stomach as the baby kicked inside of her. "This kid is definitely related to Sam, she fidgets just as much as he does." Mallory looked alarmed all of the sudden and turned to C.J. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't be complaining when..."  
C.J. shook her head. "It's okay. Don't worry about. Being pregnant isn't an easy feat, and if I was still pregnant you better bet your ass I would be complaining and blaming Danny."  
"I really am sorry."  
"Miscarriages happen, Mal, honestly I'll get another chance." C.J. smiled a sad smile, she was sad that she wasn't pregnant but she knew that she and Danny were plan on trying again very soon.  
Mallory in all of her over emotional state grabbed C.J. and hugged her.  
The First Lady entered the Oval Office. "Donna, what's going on?"  
"They're having a moment and I can't seem to make myself go out there. I don't know what the hell anyone was thinking letting me walk down the isle in front of a crowd. I'm a klutz. I leave my underwear in front of reporters, I messed up my election ballet and I was surrounded by the press at an abortion clinic, I'm pretty sure if I take one step I'm going to make a fool out of myself."  
Abbey Bartlett laughed. "Oh, honey, you and Josh really are a match made in Heaven."  
"Donnatella Moss, what is going on in here?" Donna's father entered the room looking stern and anxious.  
"I can't go out there."  
"Donnatella, I dragged my sorry ass out here all the way from Wisconsin, excuse my language Dr. Bartlett, and I'm finally getting the chance to have the son I've always wanted, but if you stay in here, Josh won't be my son-in-law which is what I thought you wanted so bad."  
"Came around to my side of thinking, did you?" Donna smirked.  
"Truth be told, no man will ever be good enough for my Donnatella but he's the best one I've met, so let's get you out there."  
Donna kissed her father on the cheek and allowed him to walk her outside to the path. Donna found Josh waiting anxiously at the end of it. The music started and the audience rose and watched as Donna walked down to her Josh.  
Mr. Moss gave away Donna to Josh and then he went and sat down by his wife to watch the ceremony.  
Donna glanced over at the groomsmen to find Sam, Toby and Danny beaming at her. She smiled back. Donna turned her attention to Josh and when she looked into his eyes she had found her future.  
"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."  
Josh lifted the veil and lowered his lips over her waiting mouth. They sealed their nuptials and parted with a blissful applause. Hand in hand they took their first steps as Joshua and Donnatella Lyman.

**_The End._**

**_  
_** _See the thing about happy endings is that they're usually just the beginning...  
_


End file.
